Forever is a long time
by Gina Callen
Summary: Sam/Callen story. D/S (You have been warned.) Callen needed to learn how to accept love, to learn that he wasn't alone. But how did he do that? How did Sam get past his defenses to help his is Story is Rated *M* for: hints of Child Abuse, Sex with a Minor, M/M Slash, D/S Relationships
1. Chapter 1

**A/N OK so Warnings first. THIS IS A SLASH D/s Story. If this is not your thing please leave now and enjoy your day. This is not BDSM but is D/S and YES there is a difference. So if any guest reviews want to tell me that I have no idea...hehehehehe you don't know me very well.**

 **Thank you to SnoopgirlZ for beta reading this story, it is out of her comfort zone and she is doing an awesome job.**

* * *

 **Forever's A Long Time.**

Chapter 1

Callen rocked back on his knees and heels, relishing in the safe feeling he was in right now as he was enveloped in subspace. It had been an intense few weeks. Losing and then finding Arkady, dealing with the things Hetty had thrown at him and going to Russia where he found out that his father was dead. He had just about hit his limit.

Hetty was avoiding him everytime he tried to ask her a question. Kensi was livid when she had left today as he had hidden her twinkie stash because she had 'borrowed' his Tootsie Pop stash. Even Deeks had snapped at him.

Sam had looked up from his desk as Callen stormed out to the gym to work out some of his frustrations. He was withdrawing from everyone and everything.

Kensi snatched the bag off her desk and shot a look of anger at her partner.

"That's it! I'm done for the day. I'll see you all Monday barring any complications. You need to talk to him Sam. You always seem to be able to get through to him. Work your _magic_." She let out a heavy sigh. " _Please_ , it's getting unbearable around here."

Sam sighed and rolled his eyes, "I don't know what you think I can do...but sure, I will talk to him." He smirked as the others nodded and headed for the door.

Sam made a phone call and smiled as his wife agreed that it was time for him to be there for his partner. She promised to have a nice time as she told him she would make arrangements for Kamran and her to visit her sister for a few days.

"Keep him safe and bring him back to us," Michelle said.

"I will, I always do," Sam agreed."Thanks baby."

"I love you Sam. Call me when you're done. We'll have a good time and see you both when we get back." Michelle hung up on him and Sam grinned. It was times like this he realized what a wonderful woman he had married.

* * *

Spending another hour on paperwork and watching everyone else leave, Sam stood up as Hetty grabbed her purse and headed for the door.

"Goodnight Mr. Hanna," she called.

"Goodnight Hetty," he replied, reaching for another folder.

Hetty stopped and turned to him. "Cameras are all off, and the building is empty. Go and give our boy what he needs," she said quietly.

Sam nearly choked, "W... _What_?"

"I have known for years it's what Mr. Callen needs. I have known that you've been helping him for the past few years," she told him, setting her purse on the desk and looking him in the eye. Hetty smiled, "I've been watching out for him for a very long time. I promise I won't do anything to compromise either of you. Mr. Callen's and your welfare is paramount to me. Now go...make him feel better and I will see you both back here Monday.

Sam nodded, "Thank you Hetty."

She turned and walked out with an all knowing smile on her face.

By the time Sam made it to the gym, Callen had worked up a huge sweat.

He was pounding the heavy bag blow by blow and hadn't even noticed the sun go down. Sam leaned against the wall, watching as Callen silently pounded out his frustrations. He stopped and grabbed the bag, wrapping his arm around it as he sobbed as quietly as he could, not wanting anyone to know he was breaking. But _Sam_ always knew when _his_ boy was hurting.

"G…" Sam's low voice rumbled through the gym.

Callen ignored him, keeping his back to his partner.

"G, you need to talk to me," Sam insisted.

Callen turned and grabbed his towel to head for the shower.

He took four steps when Sam stood hands behind his back and shouted,

" _BRAT!_ "

Instinctively Callen dropped to his knees, his head bowed, breathing heavily.

Sam strode across the gym, checking out Callen's stance and movement.

"Good...Good boy…" he stroked his hand gently over the stubble on Callen's head.

Callen shot a confused look up at Sam.

Understanding, Sam continued to pet Callen, "It's ok, everyone has gone and the camera's are turned off," he informed the younger man.

Callen let out an audible sigh of relief and waited as his 'SEAL' walked around the front of him. Sam had never liked the terms _Master and Slave._ as they were triggering issues for the both of them.

Sam was Callen's SEAL and in turn, Callen was Sam's Brat.

It had been that way for _years._

The first time it happened was when Callen was recovering from his shooting. Sam had sat for hours after Callen had been taken in for surgery. He was surprised when Macy and Nate turned up at the hospital and waited with him for the doctor inform them of Callen's prognosis. Macy stood up as a smaller woman arrived in the waiting room. Sam looked over at her - four foot nine he guessed and with the worried look on her face, maybe she was Callen's mother?

Macy walked over to her, "Agent Lange...I…"

"You have an excuse for _this_ Ms. Macy?" she glared at the taller woman.

"No...No ma'am."

"Director Vance is expecting you in Washington as soon as possible - for _reassignment._ "

"This isn't my fault," Macy hissed at her.

"You were the Operations Manager and everything that happens to your agents, _is_ your fault. When Mr. Callen came to you last month and told you he thought he was being watched, did you have his claims checked out?" The smaller woman asked.

Macy stalked to the corner of the waiting room, keeping her voice low.

"I looked into it. I just thought Callen was being paranoid. I mean he never stays in the same place for more than a few nights. How was I supposed to know?"

"Because Mr. Callen knew. He is your Agent and you should trust his judgement." Macy moved back as if struck by the woman's words.

"You need to leave," Hetty Lange said bluntly.

Macy looked visibly shocked but with Nate moving to stand near the smaller woman, she nodded and left.

Sam watched with interest as Nate walked over to her.

"He's going to be alright," he said to her, keeping his voice low.

Hetty turned to him, "I know Mr. Getz, I am, after all, his medical proxy."

At that Sam looked up with interest. _So she was related to G?_

"Of course, you are...are you staying?" Nate asked.

"I am taking over as Operations Manager at Special Projects."

Nate raised an eyebrow in surprise.

"Does he know?" he asked.

Hetty shook her head, "No...this incident necessitated my move from my last posting."

Nate grinned, "He's not going to like it. Can I be there when you tell him?"

Hetty smiled, "Of course Mr. Getz." She turned and walked towards Sam.

"Mr. Hanna, I would like your report into the incident before the end of the day please."

"I'm waiting for G's family to show up, I need to talk to them," Sam replied stubbornly.

Hetty blinked her eyes in surprise, "I thought you knew Mr. Hanna...Mr. Callen has no family."

"Then I'm staying, everyone needs someone."

Hetty stood looking her new Agent as if sizing him up, "I take it you are Mr. Callen's partner."

Sam nodded. "Six months now," he affirmed.

"Ummm….Good," She replied. "You may be just what he needs." She walked to the desk and signed the paperwork for Callen's surgery.

"Special Projects is on stand down until further notice. We will be relocating. I will have Mr. Beale send you our new location. You may be with your partner, but please, if you find he or you needs _anything,_ call me."

She handed Sam her card, "Henrietta Lange, Operations Manager, NCIS. Thank you Ms. Lange."

Hetty smiled, "You may call me Hetty, Mr. Hanna."

* * *

Months later, Sam would recall that meeting to Callen, telling him how she seemed to know both him and Callen inside and out and all Callen did, was smile. He never told him how he had known her or for how long. The only thing Sam knew was that now both himself and Hetty were Callen's medical Proxies.

Callen had regained his strength, and once a week he would disappear off the grid, just for a night, well off of Sam's grid anyway and he would come back without a word. Sam asked him once, but all Callen would reply was he needed one night a week to himself he was repaying an old debt. He reassured Sam that he wasn't in any trouble and nothing seemed to come from it, so Sam never pushed. Whenever Callen was in trouble though he and Sam would talk about it over a beer and they became stronger partners for it.

This time however, something was wrong. Something Callen was keeping to himself. He would still disappear weekly, but since he had left the hospital he hadn't come to see the new location for Special Projects. He wouldn't go to meet the team after work and he didn't even return Kensi or Mike's calls.

Callen was withdrawing. Even Hetty was beginning to look worried as she shot glances across from her office to the new bullpen, her eyes straying to the missing Agents desk.

Sam pulled up at the motel Callen was staying in and resolved to fix it.

He was a SEAL, they _**never**_ left a man behind. He had talked it over with Michelle. She understood and gave him the go ahead to do what he felt he needed to do to help his partner. She had arranged to take Kamran to her sister's for the Summer and Aiden was going to stay with friends from the academy. With the house being empty for a month, he booked off a week of vacation and set his plan in motion.

Walking up to the door to Callen's room he held down the urge to vomit at the state of the place his partner had decided to call home for a while.

The room next door was noisy. Bass from bad rap music filled the corridor and the smell of smoked marijuana was overwhelming. Sam knocked on the door and he waited as the door opened and a bleary eyed Callen looked surprised at seeing his partner there.

"Grab your stuff, you're moving," Sam _told_ him.

Still half asleep and not thinking, Callen nodded and moved to comply which told Sam all he needed to know. Silently, they packed up Callen's few belongings and left.

Callen looked surprised as Sam pulled up outside a well kept house.

"Who lives here?" he asked.

Sam grinned, "Me," he replied.

"Ok, so you want me to wait in the car?" Callen asked, unsure of what he was doing there.

"No. Michelle and the kids are away for a month, you'll be staying with me," Sam said, his tone leaving no room for argument.

Callen was too tired to argue anyway so he grabbed his bag and followed Sam to the one floor home. Sam took Callen's bag and placed it in his room.

"I'm not taking your bed. I won't put you out of it," Callen argued.

Sam smirked, "You're right, you won't."

Callen looked around the home. "It's nice," he said keeping his voice and body language as neutral as he could.

"Thank you. I have a casserole in the oven. Michelle made it before she left. She said to make sure you eat it."

"Is she ok with me being here?" Callen asked, mentally looking for all the weak spots and exits.

"She is ... it's not my first time," Sam said his voice dropping an octave.

For a second Callen's eyes flicked up and Sam caught the look.

 _Was it worry or hope?_

Sam smiled slightly.

"Not your first time doing _what_?" Callen asked as Sam stepped closer.

"Giving someone what they need," Sam replied.

Callen gulped and stepped back worried, "Sam...I'm not...I …"

"Shhh...It's ok G…." Sam sighed, "I know…"

Callen looked to find his bag. He wanted to run away from what he was feeling. He knew it was wrong and he had been told more times than he cared to remember that it was wrong. He knew the last time he'd let his guard down, it had hurt him. _She_ had hurt him and he had to leave the CIA because of it. He was dizzy and tired and his defenses were down, so he couldn't stop the tears that fell. He turned to hide his face, his shame, and braced himself for the reaction from his partner. He jumped as Sam's hand landed gently on his shoulder and as he turned him to face the taller man, he was pulled him into his arms.

"It's ok….let it out…" Sam said rubbing Callen's back comfortingly.

He moved them to the couch and that first night Callen fell asleep wrapped in Sam's arms as he cried himself to exhaustion.

Callen woke up the next morning feeling safe, a feeling he hadn't felt in forever. He stiffened as he realized that he was in someone's arms and that someone wasn't a woman.

"Shhh G," Sam said as he felt Callen stir.

"Sam?" Callen all but jumped out of Sam's arms.

Within seconds Sam was fully awake.

"Callen...stop…" he ordered.

Callen stopped moving and stood still.

"It's ok G, this...this is not is not you being vulnerable, or you being less in my eyes. It's about you being my partner and me giving you what you need."

"I'm not gay Sam," Callen growled, his shoulders shaking in anger, or was it frustration?

"Not saying you are," Sam snapped back. "Turn around."

Callen turned, his jaw set stubbornly.

"I can give you what you need G, no strings attached."

"No...no you can't. _No one_ can…" Callen trailed off as he turned away again.

"Sit down," Sam said and waited as Callen sat on the couch. Sam moved himself to the coffee table and sat with Callen's legs between his. "What you need is someone who can look after you, take the pressure off and love you."

Callen looked away ashamed.

Sam reached out and lifted Callen's head, "You've been through a lot, physically and mentally. You need to learn to let go."

"Can't...can't let go...no one...I have no one to…"

"I'm your partner, I'll catch you," Sam replied praying that Callen would look him in the eye.

"I can't...never have had anyone…"

"You have me now, I care...let me care for you."

" _ **You're**_ not gay Sam, you can't know what I need...How can you know what I need when I don't know what I need?"

Sam smiled indulgently, "Like I told you G, not my first Rodeo."

Callen let out a sigh as Sam rubbed his hands on the tops of his legs gently above the knee, not going any higher, not pushing….just comforting...just there.

"You need to have someone you trust to have your back G. Someone who will do what they can to care for you. Do you trust me like that?"

Callen looked into Sam's face and gulped at how close they were. "Of..of course I trust you, you're my partner."

Sam smiled. "I won't hurt you. I won't betray you and I won't ever tell or not be available if you really need me," Sam promised.

Callen didn't believe him but he nodded.

"We need a contract," Sam stated.

Callen flinched.

There won't be anything on paper. Just us, here and now. As your Dom, I will take care of _all_ your needs and respect you.

An unwanted memory entered Callen's mind. "I can't call you Master. I am _not_ your slave. I _won't_ do it."

"I don't really like the Master thing," Sam admitted. "I can be called something else but not Sam. We will save that for when we aren't alone. You are my partner and a bit of a brat, but not my slave." Sam smiled as Callen looked him in the eye and smiled.

"Yeah G...you are my Brat."

Callen laughed, "And you're going to be my SEAL?"

Sam nodded, "Damn right."

Callen's smiled faded "But...what if...what if I'm not into what you want to do to me?"

"Do you know about safewords?" Sam asked.

Callen shook his head.

A true Master/Slave relationship would have had safewords. He felt the pit of his stomach tighten as he realized that the man before him had been a victim and not a willing participant. "A safe word is used when either of us is uncomfortable with what is happening. _Everything_ stops when we use our safewords. No exceptions. My safe word is _clowns._ "

Callen looked up with a smirk, "Clowns?"

Sam laughed nervously, " _Hate them!_ " He admitted.

Callen looked worried, "Does it have to be something I hate?" he asked.

Sam shook his head, "Na...something that is guaranteed to not be used between us in any other context when we are together like this."

Callen thought about it, "Hetty." He said with a grin.

"The new Operations Manager?" Sam asked.

Callen laughed, "Yeah, would _you_ think about _her_ in the bedroom?"

Sam smiled shaking his head, "No...no I wouldn't."

"That's good to know." Callen listened as Sam continued but he suddenly felt the genuine smile on his lips caused by Sam's heartfelt words spread the warmth to the rest of his face. And it didn't go unnoticed by Sam. " _What?_ "

"You have a beautiful smile. You should do it more often. "And _I_ intend to put many a more smiles on your face."

Before he knew it, Sam had leaned closer and gave him a chaste kiss. He pulled back waiting to see what Callen would do. Would he run? Hit him? Or accept what it was that Sam was so desperately trying to offer?

For a second Callen was tempted to run, but Sam was _so_ close he closed his eyes and let go, praying that Sam would keep his word. And he did.

* * *

Now five years later Sam was _still_ his SEAL and Callen was _still_ Sam's Brat. Though _**never**_ at work. Not until today.

Callen waited as Sam explained that they were alone in the building, that it was safe. Only then did he let go.

He allowed Sam to work his magic, and take him in the way only Sam could. Floating in subspace,he waited for his SEAL's touch to ground him and let him know it was ok to feel and ok to move on.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N So a great many people to thank who helped me with getting this chapter right and helping me realise that sometimes less is more. So Thank you to all at the facebook fanfiction concrit group for tackling this with me and a very special thank you to SnoopgirlZ who read through the whole thing even though the subject matter is dark.**

 **That brings me to this warning...TRIGGER WARNINGS IN THIS CHAPTER...There are mentions of Non-con and Child abuse in this chapter, if this will trigger you please avoid.**

* * *

 **Chapter 2**

In the silence of the gym Callen waited as his SEAL walked around him.

"You broke a rule Brat," Sam said, his voice rumbling in the silence.

Callen didn't want to reply, but he knew that vocal responses were required.

"I don't think so sir," he replied.

"You don't think so Brat?" Sam snapped.

"No…" Callen mumbled.

Sam placed a slap on the back of Callen's head.

"Strip," Sam ordered.

As fast as he could Callen removed his gym clothes and stood there, his head bowed, trembling in anticipation.

"You don't think so Brat?" Sam asked again.

Callen didn't reply so Sam slapped his ass.

"Sir...NO SIR!" Callen yelled, tears of frustration rolling down his face.

"You broke a rule. You needed help, you were hurting and you _**didn't**_ come to _me_!" Sam said.

"I...I…" Callen dropped to his knees again, sobs tearing from his body.

"You needed to grieve G. It's ok to do that." Sam walked around him stroking his head.

Callen shook his head still sobbing.

"Shower now," Sam ordered.

Callen ran into the showers and stood under the spray allowing his tears to mix unchecked with the water. Sam joined him, lathering soap all over his body and massaging his neck and shoulders, allowing all the tension to wash away with the water flowing down the drain.

Sam felt him shudder, "That's it...that's my boy...let it go...just let it all go…"

Callen smiled slightly at the familiar words, remembering so long ago when that had first been said to him, and how he thought he had felt loved.

* * *

He closed his eyes as he remembered. He was ten...nearly eleven and was living with the McPherson's in Bakersfield. He had been so small then….

Callen's social worker pulled up outside a small home where a rusted pick up truck sat in the driveway. He held onto his bag as his social worker got out.

"Come on Callen, we don't want to keep Mr. and Mrs McPherson waiting. You'll like them, they own a trucking company. I remember you said you liked trucks. Mrs. McPherson also works in the local diner as a waitress. Now we have to hurry as Mrs McPherson has to be at work in an hour."

The man called brightly as he opened the door waiting for Callen to get out. He got out and hoped there were no bigger kids here. He'd just left the group home where he'd been bullied for being small so he hoped he could just be left alone.

Alone was his safety default. No one bothered him and as long as he wasn't being hurt, he didn't mind. He hated being bullied for his weird voice, which he had managed to hide after practicing his words for hours and not talking for four months in public. None of his caseworkers had noticed he wasn't talking. He overcame that hurdle, but being blond and blue eyed apparently was a bad thing amongst kids in the system.

It caused a lot of jealousy amongst the other children, the children who didn't fit everyone's expectation of a perfect child. So more often than not Callen would find himself bruised, bloody and beaten by children who wanted a chance at being adopted. Because when it came to adoption day, the blue eyed, blond haired children were always picked first.

All except him.

He was never asked to meet the parents on Adoption Day, as he was usually kept in the medical room, or in his bed, with a sore lip or bloody nose.

This time, his beating had been seen by his caseworker, and it was decided that if Callen was this much trouble, he should be moved from the group home and on to a 'one to one setting' as the caseworker had put it. This necessitated the long drive from Los Angeles to Bakersfield, or in his caseworkers' words, 'as far from trouble as he could get'. So he timidly followed the caseworker to the door and stood behind him as he knocked.

* * *

Mrs McPherson opened the door. She had a kind face and smiled at him.

He liked her. She motioned them in while getting her coat on.

Sometimes Callen would make an instant judgement when entering a home. Mostly it was a gut feeling that would tell him not to stay or not to relax. He had learned to trust that gut feeling as it was all he had when coming face to face with _so many_ people in his life.

 _This might be a nice place_ , he thought.

"I'm so sorry, but my shift starts at the diner in an hour, I do the night shift, but, Callen is it?" she asked and he nodded, "Well Callen, I will be home during the day and I look forward to us getting to know each other. I hope you like your room and enjoy your stay with us." She smiled and ruffled her hand through his shaggy blond hair.

The caseworker looked up, "I will catch up with you in a few days," he said.

A man walked in with two mugs of coffee. "Mr Parkins?" He asked.

The caseworker turned to him, "Mr. McPherson, how's the trucking business going?"

"Business isn't brilliant, but we are getting by," Bill McPherson replied, before taking a look at the small blond headed boy behind the social worker.

"Garden is looking nice," Mr Parkins stated as he took the chair Mr. McPherson was offering and took out Callen's paperwork.

"Yes the wife does a good job with that," Bill admitted.

The social worker smiled and nodded in Callen's direction, "This here is Callen. His first name is just G...it kinda got lost in the system." He laughed offhandedly. "But he usually just comes to boy anyway."

Bill McPherson looked up at that and shot Callen a leering look which the social worker missed, "Really?" he laughed as Callen looked down at his feet in embarrassment. He hated it when the subject of his name came up. Just for once he wanted someone to pick a name for him.

Parkins finished the paperwork and handed a piece of paper over for McPherson to sign. "Just sign here and he's all yours," he said cheerfully. "It's nice here Callen, there's a good school just down the road."

McPherson looked up, "I thought you knew we home educate. I have a state certified tutor come in once a week to check everything is good. We have a very good report so far."

Parkins looked down, "Oh...yes I see. That will be good then. Hopefully Callen may settle here, make some friends."

McPherson nodded, "There are some unsavory elements at the local school and we are a very religious family. Wouldn't want any drugs or cussing to come into our household." He turned addressing Callen for the first time, "You don't cuss do you boy?"

Callen shook his head and McPherson gave him a stern look. "N...No Sir." he said quietly.

"I hear a faint accent. You sure this boy isn't Mexican?"

Parkins shook his head, "Nope. We think it was due to the trauma he might have witnessed as a child. No one knows for sure. He had an accent when he arrived but it seems to have all but gone."

McPherson studied him looking up and down, "Looks All-American to me...Ok, we'll take him."

Parkins nodded and grabbed his paperwork. He hated racists. And even though he knew McPherson was one, he had worked hard finding a placement for Callen and wasn't going to argue with the man.

"I'll be back in a few weeks, sooner if you need me." He shook Bill's hand and headed for the door turning to Callen. "You do everything you are told Callen. I don't want to hear bad things about you now, ya hear?" Callen nodded and watched as Parkins left and shut the door with a bang that made him jump.

"Ok Boy. Let's get you to your room. Take your shoes off. We don't allow shoes in the house. I'll get you some clothes."

Callen blinked for a second, _clothes_?

"I...I have clothes sir," he said.

Bill stopped and turned to him.

"We don't have back chat in this house. You a Christian boy?"

Callen looked at him and blinked again, he didn't know what that was. "I...I dunno sir," he admitted.

"So you're a heathen." He took Callen's bag from his hand and as Callen opened his mouth to object, Bill pushed him to the wall.

"You are a heathen and we are a God fearin' household. You will do as I say and I will show you the love that God gives good children."

"I...I wanna be good," Callen said. This was the first time a foster family had offered to give him love. He had heard about love in schools and how it was special and he really, _really_ wanted it.

Bill stopped and ran his hand through the small boy's longish blond hair, "Good...good boy." He smiled and placed his hand on the middle of Callen's back as he led him upstairs.

* * *

The room Callen was given was plain in the extreme. It had a bed, nightstand, desk, chair and a lamp. The bed had two sheets, a pillow and a thin blanket covering it. It all sat on the bare wood floor. There were no toys, no pictures on the walls and no rugs. Just one big book on the nightstand.

"That's your bible. You will be expected to read and study it at all times you aren't doing something else."

Callen looked at the book, wanting to touch it, but wasn't sure if he was allowed to touch it just yet.

"You can look boy. The way to love is in there. Through the Lord's and _my_ teachings, you will learn how to be worthy of love." Bill smiled at Callen as he thought about how Callen's soft skin would feel under his hands. _oh yes, I will enjoy teaching you all about love,_ he thought.

Callen carefully took the book and opened the thin pages. It wasn't like the books he'd seen in school. They all had pictures and he knew he was going to have trouble with some of the bigger words.

Bill smiled at the boy's attempts to look at the bible. "You may be good enough yet." He sat on the bed and patted the blanket beside him, "Come sit here. Bring the book and we can look at it together."

Callen eagerly clambered up beside his new foster father and held the book out. He had often envied other children when he saw them being read to by an adult or older kid. He desperately wanted someone to read to him. Bill held his arm out, "Come closer and pay attention as I read boy," he directed.

Callen moved closer and Bill put his arm around Callen as he read to him. Softly and slowly, the older man rubbed his arm up and down the outside of Callen's leg. The words were comforting and the warmth of the man's arm made him feel so safe that Callen fell asleep listening to the Lord's words.

He woke up with a jolt as a pain pushed through his body.

"NO!" he yelled.

" _Shhhh,_ it's ok boy. Remember, it's God's love and you gotta be punished for your sins before you can be saved," Bills crooned.

 _Sins? What's a sin? I'm just a kid, we haven't learned that in school yet. I didn't do anything, I'm sure I didn't?_

Callen cried as he felt the man's weight pin him face first to the bed. A blinding pain shot through him as he screamed and then passed out.

When he woke up, he felt a warm, wet feeling encompassing him.

He cried, but stopped as Bill's voice came again, "I love you boy, you are my boy...you're my _good_ boy, That's it...that's my boy...let it go...just let it all go…"

Callen sniffed as Bill cleaned him up, "You...you do?" he asked.

Bill smiled at him, "You keep being this good and doing as I say, and yeah I will love you." He handed the boy a towel, "Dry yourself off Boy."

"Yes...Sir…" He stopped as Bill hit him.

" _No!_ _Not_ sir. Not _here._ Here I am your Master. Only here and only with me will you ever say that word. You will _never_ say it outside of _this room._ You will not leave this room without my permission and you will _NOT_ talk to anyone else without my permission. _**Do you understand, Boy?**_ "

Callen looked confused, Bills face softened and he pulled Callen in and kissed him gently. "Boy you are mine and this is how you earn my love _and_ God's love. You follow the rules, you behave and that way we can love you. You want to be loved don't you?" Bill asked, feigning a look of being upset.

Callen wiped the tears from his face, "I...I want to be loved...M...Master."

Bill kissed him again and Callen tried not to gag as he forced his tongue inside the child's mouth.

"I love you boy."

"But...Master, it hurt...Does love always hurt like that?" Callen asked innocently.

Bill nodded gravely, "If you have evil in you it can hurt, but if you follow the rules and are well behaved, it can be pleasurable for _both_ of us. You want that don't you boy? Your Master to love you without pain?"

Callen wanted to be loved and be a part of family more than anything and if this pain Bill gave him came along with it, he would take it. So he nodded. "Yes Master."

And so the "loving" continued.

* * *

Callen enjoyed his time during the day with Mrs. McPherson as she helped him with his writing, reading and math. She always found a way to make Math fun, whether it be sorting out seeds they would eventually plant in her garden or figuring out the weights and measures to make a chocolate cake.

They cooked together and when Bill came home at the end of the day they all ate dinner together. He talked to his wife about the trucking business and she about her day. This was done while Bill, always sitting right beside Callen, rubbed his hand slowly up and and down the inside of the young boy's thigh. Callen smiled happily at his foster father while his foster mother, oblivious to the happenings under the table, talked and chatted with her family.

Bill would turn and tell Callen he was a good boy and proud of him, Sheila beaming with delight that her men were getting along so well. It didn't matter what Callen was doing with Bill, the older man always found a way to add a sexual context to the situation. One of his favorite pastimes was brushing up against the young boy as he reached for the dishes while they did the washing up after dinner.

When Sheila went upstairs and get herself ready for work, Bill would take Callen out into the garden to play football. They tossed the ball around and then Bill would get him to bend over to hike the ball. Grabbing him from behind, Callen would squeal as Bill lifted him up and would quickly place a small kiss on the back of his neck. He'd then place him back on the ground and with a small swat on the butt, send him running back to the house.

"Go boy, say goodnight to your foster mother so we can watch a movie before bed."

Callen smiled and ran for the house.

Sheila came down the stairs, "You boys ok?" she asked.

Callen nodded, "Bill said we can watch a movie." he said.

"Ooh sounds good, did you go to the video store Bill?" she asked.

Bill nodded, "Popped in on my way home," he said picking up a video for her to see.

She looked at the case. "Ooh Pete's Dragon. That's a good movie. Well, you boys enjoy yourselves and I'll see you in the morning."

Bill kissed his wife goodbye and Callen sat on the couch with his hands in his lap.

Bill turned to Callen, "You go and get your pajamas on and I'll start the movie," he said and smiled as Callen ran upstairs to put on the new pajamas that Bill had bought him the first week. Bill got out a the movie and put it in the video player.

As the adverts started Bill sat next to Callen on the sofa. "Sit here," he instructed as he patted the couch right beside him.

Callen crawled over to be closer as the movie started.

"What's it about?" he asked.

"An orphan boy, just like you who finds himself a family in a small town. He has a friend who is a dragon." He wrapped his arm around Callen whose eyes slowly started to droop.

Bill rubbed comfortingly up and down Callen's leg, every once in a while his hand getting closer to the hole in his pajama pants.

Sleepily, Callen tried to focus on the movie as he knew Bill would get him to tell Sheila what the movie was about and not focus on what Bill was doing to him as his hand slipped inside his pants.

Although he felt uncomfortable when Bill was touching him and was certain that some of the words Bill used when they were alone were 'cuss' words. Callen was reassured by Bill that it was alright and that this was real love and _no one_ could take it away from him.

That was all Callen had ever wanted, _real love._ So there was a bit of pain, how many times in his life had he been subjected to pain...this was just another time, but he _now_ was hugged, touched and kissed. Kids at school had talked about when they were hurt that their mommies and daddies kissed them, so it was normal right?

Bill said it was normal and Bill was smart. He knew all about God and Jesus who hurt so that other people could be happy. Just like him, he hurt so Bill could be happy. It was real love. It had to be because it was _God's love._ He was loved!

All the while Bill was telling him how he was a good boy and how this was their secret. This was, Callen thought, how love was meant to be. After all just that morning Sheila had been in the kitchen singing along with the radio about a secret love. He wondered if he would ever be loved enough to shout out from the highest hills like Doris Day wanted to do in the movie that Sheila watched sometimes. Sometimes Bill would shout when he was loving him, maybe that was what the song meant. It wasn't an angry shout after all. Bill said it was because God made his heart sing so much and that this was how he thanked God for sending Callen to them.

* * *

Callen was at the McPherson home for six weeks. He would have stayed longer had Shelia not caught a cold and been sent home from work early one day.

When she walked into the house she became concerned as all the lights were off downstairs and only her foster son's light was on.

"Hello?" she called out after hanging up her coat and pulling a handful of tissues out of her pocket.

She shrugged at the lack of reply and headed into the kitchen for a glass of water and some Tylenol. It was eerily quiet that night, unlike when she usually came home to find Callen and Bill watching TV. She shrugged it off figuring that maybe they had gone out for a bit. She climbed the stairs and went to her room. After putting her purse on her bed, she sat down and removed her shoes. The silence was disturbed by a noise and she was certain it was coming from Callen's bedroom. It was a small cry, followed by some shushing … from another person's voice.

Worried that her foster son had come down with a cold as well, she put on her slippers and went to the bathroom to grab the bottle of Children's Tylenol just in case he had a fever.

Opening the door to Callen's room shattered her world. For a moment she stood there dumbly, her brain not registering what her eyes were seeing. Her husband sitting on their foster son's bed, his eyes closed, pleasure washing over his face and lacing his voice, as he whispered words of encouragement to the boy who was on his knees between the older man's legs.

"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?" She screamed at the top of her lungs.

Callen moved quickly away from Bill as his wife continued screaming and started throwing things.

"Mrs...Sheila?" Callen asked scared at her actions.

She stopped and tears filled her eyes as she ran over and hugged him, "Oh you poor boy, I am so sorry…" she cried out, then she turned to her husband.

"GET OUT! I'm calling the police."

He stood up hastily adjusting himself and glaring at Callen, "He made me do it, he was possessed. Sheila, you know I'm not like that, it's a mistake."

Sheila stood between Callen and her husband, "And how many more _mistakes_ do you intend to have?"

Callen flinched. He had liked her a lot and now she was saying he was a mistake. Maybe he had done something wrong. He didn't want to leave as he was certain he wouldn't be loved anywhere else.

" _Please_ …" He whispered as Bill strode out of the room without looking at him.

"Stay in your room Callen sweetie. I'll have your social worker pick you up in the morning," Sheila said, staring at her husband's back before she glanced over at him sadly with tears in her eyes and closed the door.

As soon as it shut Callen curled into a ball on the bed and started sobbing. He figured that was probably all the love he was ever going to get. _But what did he do that was wrong that had Mrs. McPherson sending him away._ If Bill wouldn't love him then God wouldn't love him...maybe he would have to die like that Jesus man that Bill kept talking about. Maybe he would never be worthy of love again.

For him it was a _long_ time before he found that kind of love again. Three years to be exact.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N Again my thanks to the awesomeness that is SnoopgirlZ my beta, and there may be trigger warnings in this one too.

* * *

Chapter 3

At thirteen G. Callen was being moved _again_. He'd done another year in a group home. He had never talked about the McPhersons. He had been questioned by the police and his social worker. But he wouldn't say anything. Mrs McPherson had had a mental breakdown and in between sobbing uncontrollably all she had been able to say was that her husband had hurt the child. Hoping still that the social worker would change his mind and send Callen back to the home where he had felt love for the first time, he admitted that he had hit Mr. McPherson with a broom. As it happened he had done just that a day before they had been discovered albeit not as hard as he stated, but he thought that at least he wasn't lying. However, to his despair, he had been told he could never go back to the McPherson's again.

After that he had refused to go to another foster home and had insisted on only staying in group homes. He refused to participate in any activities and apart from going to school, he started hanging out with what he knew Mr. McPherson would call the wrong crowd and he 'cussed' every chance he got.

Over the next few years Callen became a loner. He didn't hang with anyone else in the group home, he would answer back and constantly be late coming home from school, smirking as the house manager grounded him.

Mr. Parkins, his social worker, despaired at Callen ever becoming a useful member of society and would frequently mention this in case meetings.

Callen, now thirteen, sat at the end of a long table while his social worker sat the other end with education welfare, his school principal and the chairman of this particular meeting, an independant social worker.

Jon Lennox, Chairman on this occasion had watched as Callen had slunk into the room and slumped in the chair as far away from the others as he could get.

"Well," he said brightly. "Welcome to today's meeting. I am glad you could all join us."

Callen rolled his eyes and leaned back, putting his feet on the desk.

"Callen, sit up, we are here for your benefit so you may want to pay attention," Lennox said.

With a heavy sigh Callen dropped his feet to the floor and leaned forward, "Why you never listen to anything I say," he grumbled.

"Callen we are here for what's best for you and we are concerned about your attitude."

Callen threw back his head and laughed, "Tell it to my parents, maybe they'll send me to my room….Oh wait yeah, I don't have any and none of you give a damn where I am."

Parkins looked up, "Callen that's not true. We do worry, that's why we are here. You've been skipping school, lying, coming home after curfew and I now hear from your principal that you have been caught smoking at school."

"So…?" Callen took a pack of cigarettes from his pocket and went to light one up as his social worker stood up and pulled the offending item out of his mouth and put it out.

" _ **HEY!"**_ Callen shouted annoyed, "Those are mine."

"Why are you behaving like this G?" Ms. Harley his principal asked.

"Like _what_?" Callen wouldn't meet their eyes.

Jon, realizing that Callen was pushing his boundaries, turned back to the others, "G. Callen's last placement in a foster home was three years ago am I right?" he asked.

Parkins looked at his records and nodded.

"How was his behavior in that placement….the McPherson's?" Lennox asked.

"I was good!" Callen snapped, "I was loved there and you pulled me away from it. You made me leave!"

Lennox looked at his notes, "I see...so you liked it so much you refused any more home placings."

"I wanna go back there, I don't want anywhere else." Callen blinked back the tears that threatened to fall. "I don't wanna go to any other placements."

Lennox looked at Parkins, they had been trying for months with therapists to get him to open up.

"Callen…"

"I don't care, you don't care about me. All you care about is me turning up to school and getting marks in your books. You won't teach me the stuff I learned before…"

Parkins looked up surprised, "What stuff Callen?" he asked.

Callen shook his head and grabbed the cigarettes from the table in front of his social worker and ran out the door. The others looked concerned and Lennox touched an intercom unit to alert security.

"It's alright Sir, I can see the boy, he's sitting on a low wall, smoking in the parking lot. I'll keep an eye on him sir," the guard replied.

* * *

They went back to their meeting and an hour later Parkins came out and walked over to where Callen was sitting on the wall.

"You all done deciding my fate?" Callen snapped, not looking at the man.

"Yep." Parkins smirked at the boy.

Callen took a large drag on his cigarette and blew the smoke deliberately into Parkins' face, "Well?" He asked.

Parkins coughed but ignored him.

"We are putting you into a foster placement."

" _ **WHAT NO!"**_ Callen jumped up but Parkins grabbed his arm.

"It is a single parent home, Sara Martin, she has two sons, Jake and Pete, both near your age. You need to learn to behave."

Callen glared at him.

"I won't go," he snapped.

A car pulled up and he watched as a woman and two boys got out. Callen forgot what he was saying as he clapped eyes on the oldest boy. Actually he _looked_ more like a _man_. He was, in Callen's eyes a hunk! Callen blushed as the boys looked at him and smiled.

"Mr. Parkins?" The woman said, "I'm sorry I'm late, we got stuck in traffic. I've been picking stuff up for Jake's trip."

Parkins stood up and walked over to greet her, "Sara Martin, nice to see you again, this is Callen," he said nodding towards the boy.

Sara turned to her boys, "Jake, Pete come here and meet Callen. He's the boy I was telling you about and he's going to stay with us for a while."

Callen's jaw nearly dropped as the kid he had been looking at...well drooling over would be more accurate, turned and smiled at him. His deep brown eyes looking straight into his soul. Feelings he hadn't felt for a long time reawakened and he realized with embarrassment that his pants were growing tighter. He pulled off his jacket and sat back on the low wall as if not interested. Pete, the brown eyed boy in question, smiled and looked him up and down.

Callen felt guilty feeling this way for someone else other than his master, but in the three years since he had been taken from the McPherson's he hadn't had anything more than a kiss or a half assed (in his opinion) fumble with other boys who had no idea what he needed from them. What he needed was a new master. After all, in his own way, Callen still cared for his 'master' and didn't want to be 'loved' by another. Callen grabbed his bag and after Ms. Martin had signed the appropriate paperwork he went home with them.

* * *

This foster mother was a busy but kind person and Callen fitted in right away. She had two older sons who were just a few years Callen's senior. Pete and Jake Martin were both sporty kids loving the outdoor life and were pleased to meet Callen.

Jake came downstairs the first night with a large bag in his hand. "I'm sorry I can't stay G, I have a camping trip with the Scouts this week." He turned to the stairs and called up, "I'm ready to go Ma."

Sara Martin ran down the stairs, "Ok I'll get my keys." She turned to the two boys, "It's a long drive for me Pete, so I'm going to get a motel room and come back in the morning. Will you be alright with Callen?" she asked.

Pete smiled at Callen whose heart did flip flops as his face turned red.

"Sure mom. I don't have to go to work tonight as the Garage is closed so I can help out," eighteen year old Pete said his, brown hair flipping over his eye again as his mom brushed it out of the way.

"Ok I'll call you before I head back tomorrow. There is food in the fridge and you boys make sure you get to bed at a decent hour ok?"

Callen and Pete nodded as they stood at the door, Pete's arm resting lightly on the younger boy's shoulders.

Sara kissed her son on the cheek and ruffled Callen's hair, "Be good you two," she ordered and she headed to the car.

* * *

Watching as she drove away Callen waited for Pete to turn and push him or hit him, but Pete did none of those things.

"Pizza?" Pete asked as he turned and walked into the house.

"Sure," Callen replied following him.

He sat at the table watching as Pete prepared the meal. Pete gave him a can of Pepsi and they chatted about what Callen liked and didn't like, school, anything thing that interested him. All the while, Callen was blushing as no one had paid him this much attention to him in _years_. After dinner, Pete and Callen washed up together, laughing and joking around.

"OK so I suppose I had better show you your room," Pete said as he put the last plate away.

Callen nodded and followed as Pete grabbed Callen's bag and walked up the stairs, "You get to share with me." Pete smiled at the prospect of sharing his room with the young man who had such piercing blue eyes. Even if, unlike him, Callen wasn't gay, he knew his dreams would be full of the things he wanted to do to the younger boy.

He put Callen's bag on the spare bed and opened the top drawer in his dresser, "This is for you. If you need more space let me know, ok?"

Callen nodded and unpacked his stuff, all of which fitted in the one drawer. He turned and Pete was gone. Callen shrugged figuring he had gone downstairs so he decided to see if he could find the bathroom.

Walking down the hall and trying doors, he found two other bedrooms and a linen closet. When he tried the last door it opened and he was hit by a cloud of steam. After his eyes adjusted to the steam, he noticed a silhouette behind the shower curtain. Pete was in the shower, standing and making groaning noises. Callen, recognising those noises stopped dead.

For a moment Callen stood still, transfixed at the sight before him, hoping Pete wouldn't turn around. The water sliding down the back of his muscular body, mixing with soap, made him instantly hard and he wanted to touch himself. He felt embarrassed that if he were to be caught, there was _no way_ Pete would think of him like _that._ And he was angry with himself because he felt he was betraying Bill.

Pete shifted in the shower as he neared his climax.

"G!" he groaned as Callen watch white jets of cum spurt from the older boy.

In shock he realized that Pete had been thinking about him. _Pete had just jacked off in the shower thinking about him!_

Then as he turned to leave, his sneakers slipped on the wet tiles.

"Who's there?" Pete stuck his head around the shower curtain and blushed as he saw Callen staring at him. "Hey G, I didn't hear you. Did you need anything?" he asked, r _eally_ hoping Callen hadn't heard him.

Callen blushed even redder and fled the bathroom, not noticing Pete's smile as he did so. _He had heard him_. Five minutes later, with a towel slung low around his hips, Pete walked into the bedroom determined not to waste this opportunity.

* * *

"You all settled?" Pete asked him.

"Yeah," G replied, not looking in his direction.

"You want something to read?" Pete asked with a grin laying on his bed.

He picked up a magazine and threw it at G.

Callen opened it and his jaw dropped. It was filled with naked men.

"I...it's...I…"

"It's ok G. I saw you looking at _me_ ," Pete said as he moved so he was exposed on the bed.

Callen sat up and glanced shyly at him.

"You ever been with a boy before?" Pete asked.

Callen nodded. "I was loved once," he replied looking sadly at his feet.

"Once?" Pete sat up and looked over at the teenager.

"I was bad so they sent me away." Callen's heart broke at the fact that he missed his master so much. Finally, with no one but Pete there, he cried.

Pete moved to sit next to Callen and wrapped his arms around the now sobbing boy.

"It's ok Callen, it's ok...you're here with us now. We'll love you... _I'll_ love you," Pete said trying to stop the beautiful boy from crying. He couldn't believe that someone so kind and beautiful as Callen was not loved by anyone and he wanted to do anything he could to fix that.

Callen looked up at the older boy with so much hope in his eyes that Pete's heart broke.

"Really?" Callen asked, his bright blue eyes full of hope.

Without even thinking, Pete kissed him.

Callen wrapped his arms around Pete's neck, deepening the kiss.

That night Pete showed Callen what being loved was truly like. He was delighted how Callen wanted to do all he could to please the older boy. They both came together and lay intertwined on the bed.

Callen woke up the next day at peace. Pete kissed him gently.

"That Callen, what happened last night, is being loved."

Callen smiled, "I like it," he admitted. "Will you be my master now?"

Pete looked at him in surprise, "Master? You know about Master's and Subs?" He had heard about them in conversations in the locker room. A friend of his had been into that with girls and he'd like the idea, but only with boys.

Callen nodded, "I had a master, and he loved me, but I had to go away."

Pete shrugged thinking it must have been some childish game or twisted thing in one of the group homes Callen had been in. "If that's what you want. You will have to do _everything_ I ask of you," he ordered, testing the ground.

Callen nodded happily. _This_ he knew how to do.

Pete started to talk to him but the phone rang, "Hold on, we'll start when I get back."

Sara Martin called from the motel she was at. Her car had broken down and it was going to take three days to get the parts. She was worried for the boys but her son informed her that he could get time off work and they had enough food, so they would be fine. She laughed and just made him promise that they would behave. After Pete reassured her, he grinned from ear to ear as he put the phone down. Three whole days with his beautiful boy who wanted nothing more than to please him. He was in teenage hormone heaven. He ran upstairs and found Callen lying in the bed.

"Slave, kneel," Pete ordered.

Callen looked up at Pete and for a moment the older boy saw a look of worry on the younger boy's face. The thought of getting a new master scared Callen and it showed. "Trust me, I'm your Master and we have three days, just you and me - you're gonna love it."

Callen stood up and then he knelt, Pete showing him how to do it properly by leaning forward so his naked ass was just above the ground. And by leaning forward, _everything_ Pete wanted to see was on view.

Pete's lips curved into a slow smile of satisfaction as he pulled Callen up and took him in a bruising kiss.

"Have you ever given a blow job?" Pete asked and his eyes widened in shock as Callen nodded.

"Oh my God you are perfect!" Pete sighed as Callen smiled. Eager to please his new master, Callen went ahead and with his mouth, showed Pete just how much he knew.

The knowledge Pete had came from a magazine he had found on the way home from school. _And_ an experience with a boy who had babysat him as a child and a few dates with boys from the football team. He put that knowledge to good use and found that as long as Callen thought he loved him, he could get all he wanted. Callen was a _willing_ slave. For three days Pete kept him naked and had more sex than he had ever had in his whole life.

Callen enjoyed it - _a lot._ Pete made him cum more times than he had ever been able to by masturbating. At one point he hit what was called "Subspace". He'd found himself completely relaxed and loved. All the fears and tension he'd been holding inside dissipated as he collapsed in Pete's arms, tears of happiness welling in his eyes.

"I love you so much!" Callen panted as his own orgasm dissipated.

Pete pulled the younger boy to his breast, "I love you too. This is real love Callen. What you are feeling is the only real love there is. The _only_ way to finding peace."

Callen nodded in agreement.

Maybe it was wrong, maybe it wasn't, but in Callen's mind, "Subspace" was his goal to be able to totally reach his joy, his nirvana. To him that was love.

He had hated it when he had been moved again. He and Pete had kept in touch until Pete had been arrested. There had been questions again about his time with the Martin's, but Callen assured them that Pete treated him well and he had felt loved with them so nothing was followed up on.

* * *

Now, he had Sam. Sam knew what he needed and the quickest way to get him there. But Sam had different rules. Sam's rules had been for the both of them, and although Sam had shown him that love came in many different forms, for Callen, Sam's love was genuine. _Their_ love was genuine. And reaching "Subspace" was a way to finding his true self.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Callen walked into NCIS looking at the piece of paper in his hand.

"I'm looking for Director Tom Morrow," he said, his skepticism at the name all too apparent.

"And you are?" The security guard asked.

" _ **CALLEN!**_ " Gibbs' voice cut through the hubbub at the NCIS Navy Yard in Washington D.C.

Callen turned around as the guard's hand went for his weapon just in case but then he relaxed as Gibbs clasped a shoulder on the young man's back and pulled him into a quick hug.

"Gibbs." Callen's smile was genuine as he looked at his friend, "How you doing?" He asked.

"Good good. What you doing here?" he asked, handing a bag to a younger man that came up behind him. "Take those to Ducky, Steve."

"Stan…" The younger man grumbled as he took the bag, "Yes Boss," he said louder and walked through the metal detector.

Callen raised his eyebrow, suppressing a smirk at the younger man as he left.

"Jethro?" He growled good naturedly.

" _What?"_ Gibbs replied the voice of all innocence, "Gotta keep him on his toes," he laughed as he stepped around the metal detector flashing his badge.

Callen stepped through and stopped as the detector went off. The security guard drew his weapon and pointed it at Callen.

"You'd better be prepared to use that," Callen growled.

" _G!"_ Gibbs snapped, "You're carrying?"

Callen nodded, "Yeah."

Gibbs grabbed a tray and held it out for the younger man, "Spill," he ordered.

Callen took his gun from the small of his back, his back up piece from the holster at his ankle, three knives, a small aerosol can and a matchbook from his back pocket. Gibbs laughed as he handed them to the guard.

"I feel naked," Callen complained as he showed the guard his letter and signed the visitors book. "Can I just take one gun?" he asked hopefully.

The guard shook his head, "I'm sorry sir, until you are cleared we should hold you."

Gibbs glared at the man who started to shake, "He has an appointment with Tom, Harry. Let him in."

"Fine Special Agent Gibbs, if you are going to vouch for him that's fine, but the….arsenal... stays here," Harry replied, staying firm.

* * *

"OK… Come on G." Gibbs steered him to the elevator and waited until the doors closed. He then pulled a knife out of his belt and handed it to the younger man.

"Keep it until after your meeting. I want it back before you leave," he ordered.

Callen smiled, "Thanks Jethro... You sure this is a good idea? I mean, me working for NCIS?"

"I wouldn't have recommended you if I thought it wasn't," Gibbs replied.

Standing silent for a moment Gibbs leaned over and pulled the emergency stop on the elevator.

"You wanna tell me what happened?" He asked.

Callen shifted and moved his back to the corner of the elevator. "No."

"You call me at 2am, tell me you just quit the CIA, where you were on course to being an SIC within another year and then you asked me for advice," Gibbs said. "Well, I gave it and you took it, so tell me G, why did you quit?"

"I got married," Callen said gripping the handrail in the elevator so tightly his knuckles went white.

" _And_ …." Gibbs prompted.

"It was for a case, but I needed….damnit Jethro, you know what I needed. We did the bust, she disappeared on me. I found her back at the safehouse drinking tea. I told her what I needed to bring me down…" He turned and hit the elevator wall, the metal reverberating in the small environment. "She laughed at me. Told me that it was wrong and that I was…" Callen turned away from his friend.

Jethro pulled Callen in for a hug. There was no lust or ulterior motive, just a friend giving comfort. Because for Callen, Jethro was just that. A friend who had known what Callen needed. He didn't tell him he was wrong, he didn't question it, all he did was support his friend.

"You'll be ok G."

Callen nodded. "But I swear to God, it'll be a cold day in hell before I trust Tracy Keller again," he vowed.

"You ready for your interview?" Gibbs asked.

Callen composed himself and nodded.

"You think he'll take me?"

Gibbs smiled, "Sure, I recommended you."

"I'm not gonna work with you, am I?" Callen stepped back worried.

Gibbs laughed, "Nah...you'd drive me crazy within a week….Just like Moscow."

Callen rolled his eyes and composed himself, "Nope, that was Leningrad," he replied as the doors opened.

* * *

They walked into the bullpen and Gibbs placed his coffee on his desk as a red headed woman looked up.

"Stan's not back yet," she told Gibbs.

"Stan?" Callen asked.

"Steve," Gibbs clarified.

" _And you are_?" Vivian Blackadder asked looking up at the newcomer in the bullpen.

"Late," Tom Morrow said looking over the balcony. "Jethro...Callen, we had a meeting five minutes ago."

"Elevator got stuck." Callen smirked, shooting a look of amusement at Jethro.

"Sure it did." Morrow's Australian accent was laced with skepticism and tinged with humor. "Come on then." Nodding in the direction of his office he turned, indicating to the two men to follow him.

"Nice to meet you, _late_." Vivian smirked as the two men jogged up the stairs to the director's office.

* * *

Callen sank into the chair that Morrow indicated to and waited as the older man looked through his file.

"So, Jethro called me this morning and said you might be the man I'm looking for."

Callen shot Gibbs a suspicious glance but said nothing.

"I'm starting up a new branch of NCIS, based in Los Angeles, have you ever been there?"

Callen smirked. "Once or twice," he replied cryptically.

"Good, then you know the area. You'll be needed mostly in the field. I grabbed your jacket from your last director. He says you are an incredibly talented undercover officer. I was hoping we would be able to tempt you into joining us."

Morrow handed a file to Callen, "These are the sorts of cases you would be dealing with. Do you think you could handle that?"

Callen read through the file. "You want me to be a _legend_?" he asked. Working for the CIA he had heard of people being hired to be a legend. However he had never thought _he_ would be one.

"Jethro said if anyone could do it, you could," Morrow replied.

Callen laughed, "I could."

"I am hand picking a team and we can find you a home in Los Angeles with an excellent relocation stipend."

"I'll take the money, but not the house. I don't stay well in one place. I prefer hotel rooms."

Morrow shot a worried look at Jethro but he shook his head and carried on.

"Very well, are you in?"

"I take it my whereabouts will be confidential?"

"Of course. I assume that you would want your last director to know where you are though to send your final check."

"NO!" Callen jumped to his feet. "I mean no...please, get them to send the check to Gibbs. He'll know how to find me."

Tom nodded, "If that's what you wish. Welcome to NCIS. Just one question, your first name, it seems to be missing from your paperwork."

"No, it's not missing. My first name is just G. And no, it's not short for anything." He paused a moment as it never got easier when saying the next words. "I _don't know_ what my first name is."

Tom smiled, "You've been asked that a lot then." He extended his hand and shook Callen's. "Welcome to the team. I have a plane ticket here for you, So if you don't want a house I will have my secretary make reservations for two nights at a hotel until you find something more to your liking. It will be ready for you on your arrival in Los Angeles."

Callen had settled in well at NCIS. Morrow keeping his word by not telling anyone from Callen's old life where he was staying. Callen had effectively made a fresh start.

* * *

Coming back after his weekend with Sam, Callen had been reminded of his first year at NCIS, his shooting and his subsequent hook up with Sam. His weekend with Sam had straightened his head out. He felt complete, loved and ready to live. And it was Sam's love he had to thank for that. He walked into the building and put his bag down as Sam smiled at him.

"You better this morning Brat?" he asked quietly.

Callen looked around.

"Hetty sent Kensi and Deeks on a coffee run. I figured you could use a bit of time to acclimatize after the weekend," Sam informed him.

Callen slumped down at his desk, "I'm fine Sam...thank you…" he replied quietly.

"We need to talk sometime, maybe later?" Sam asked.

Callen looked worried. "Are we ok?"

Sam nodded, "Of course."

Callen felt relaxed even as the main doors opened and Kensi and Deeks came in bantering about Kensi's taste in doughnuts. They put the box on the edge of the desk as Deeks put a paper cup of tea down on the desk for him.

"Hey Callen, figured you could use this," Deeks said with a smile.

He picked it up and sipped it cautiously. It was _good_.

"Thanks Deeks."

Deeks nodded and shot Sam a questioning look which was returned with a curt nod. There was a shrill whistle from the balcony and they all turned to see Eric standing there.

" _ **CASE ON DECK!**_ " He called and they filed upstairs to see what the techs had for them.

Hetty stood silently at the doorway of her office and watched as the team filed upstairs. She was pleased to see that Callen seemed to have worked through his demons. And she smiled back at the man she had come to care for greatly as a son as he smiled back at her on his way up the stairs.

* * *

"Gunnery Sergeant, Geoff Wilson, thirty-five, was found by his wife in their home in Marina Del Rey this morning. He was working on a project to test new weapons for the Marine Corps. He had two sons, Greg, nine and Geoff Junior, eleven. Both boys are missing," Eric said, putting pictures of the two blond haired, blue eyed boys on the screen.

"Kensi, you and Deeks head to Camp Pendleton, see if you can find out more about this project Wilson was working on. Sam and I will go check out the crime scene and talk to the wife," Callen said. He turned and jogged down the stairs to inform Hetty.

"And he's back," Deeks quipped with a grin as he turned to high five Kensi who sniggered and walked past him heading to the stairs. "Where's the love?" Deeks moaned following her down and out to the car.

* * *

Pulling up outside the house Callen noticed the curtains twitch on a few of the houses. He climbed out of the car and waited for Sam to join him. "We good?" Sam asked.

Callen nodded, "I'm good, let's go interview the wife." He looked at the house, the neatly kept garden, the perfect flower beds and the small wooden crucifix on the lintel of the front door. "I don't like it," he said to his partner before they knocked.

Sam pulled his gun, "What?" he trusted Callen's gut before anything.

Callen shook his head and motioned for Sam to put his gun away, "The house is too perfect, something has to be wrong here."

"It's called home ownership and pride in your home. Something you would understand if you had anything in your home." Sam gave an exaggerated sigh and knocked on the door.

A small woman answered, her blond hair looking slightly frizzy and she seemed scared. Callen picked up on it immediately shooting Sam a 'did you get that' look to which his partner gave a short nod.

"Mrs Wilson?" Callen asked.

She nodded, "Yes?"

"Agents Callen and Hanna, NCIS. We have come about the death of your husband."

"I already talked to the police about it. I'm sorry I have things I need to attend to...I have to pick the boys up from their grandfather."

"Please…." Sam's smile disarming her, "Just a few minutes, it would help us greatly.

She nodded and opened the door. For a few moments Callen took in all of the religious paraphernalia that appeared to dominate the home. It didn't take more than few seconds after that to have memories fill his head. It couldn't be the house from his past. _Could it?_

"So...where were you when your husband was killed?"

She looked sadly at them as she sat down, "I was taking the boys to see their grandfather. We had a row and I left early."

"You and your husband _fought_ before you left?" Callen reiterated.

Wendy Wilson nodded, "Geoff was raised by his mother and he didn't meet his father until a year ago. All I know is that his parents split up before he was born and his mother, Sheila, never talked about his father." She picked up the pictures of her son's. "These our our son's, Geoff Junior and Greg, our youngest. They don't know about their father yet. How am I going to tell them?"

"Have you called his father?" Callen asked.

"No, he doesn't have a phone. Bill doesn't like them. He's living near the beach and the boys enjoy spending time with him. Geoff met him and for a while they got along great, then he mentioned it to his mother. He started getting angry at the boys for spending time with him and they had a huge fight. I never knew what it was about, Geoff wouldn't tell me."

"Do you have an address for his mother? It might help to find his killer if we know what he and his father argued about."

"I'm sorry, I don't….But his father might. I have to go and pick up the boys...please, I'll miss my bus."

She turned to Sam who smiled at her, "We'll take you if you want."

She nodded and handed over a piece of paper with an address on it.

Callen sat in the passenger seat as Wendy gushed about the boy's grandfather and how he was so kind with them. Telling them how Geoff had missed having a father figure in his life and that this was supposed to be a new start for each of them. He was interrupted in his musings by his phone ringing.

* * *

"Callen," he answered.

"Hey, it's Kensi. We're just about to leave Pendleton. We've been talking to the MP's and apparently Geoff Wilson asked them to launch an investigation into his father."

"OK, _why_?" Callen asked keeping his reply vague.

"Something about his mother telling him his father was a pedophile and his children being in danger. He wanted us to find out if his mother's allegations were true."

Callen's gut clenched. He hated crimes against children, "And _were they_?" He asked as Sam chatted to Wendy about his daughter and their children's similarities.

"Yeah, apparently Wilson's father did a ten year stretch for sexual abuse on foster boys in his care in the early 1980's."

Callen clenched his teeth and looked over at Sam, seeking support in his presence. Silently knowing what his partner needed, Sam gave him a small nod and for a fraction of a second, touched Callen on the leg. After they pulled up outside the house with the address Wendy had given them, Sam got out and put his hand on the back of Callen's neck as they watched the woman walk up to the house.

"You ok?" Sam asked quietly.

Callen shook his head, barely a fraction of an inch, but it was there.

"Something's not sitting right," he admitted and then filled his partner in on what Kensi had told him.

"Damn! Do you think she knows?" Sam asked, looking over at Wendy.

"I don't think so. It seems Wilson had just started looking into his father's past."

Callen took a deep breath, his fingers touching Sam's arm briefly, moving as Wendy turned back.

"He's not answering. He _is_ there...I heard him."

There was a crash and what they were certain, was a child screaming.

Callen and Sam headed past Wendy with their guns drawn, "Wait in the car," Sam ordered to her. Wendy quickly nodded and moved to comply.

* * *

"NCIS!" Callen yelled as Sam kicked the door down.

A door upstairs opened and a boy came running down towards the two men. "Help my brother! _Please_. Grandpa has gone crazy. He keeps calling Greg " _my boy"_. I'm scared." Geoff Wilson Jr. managed to get out between sobs and tears.

"Go to the car son, your mother's out there. We've got this." Sam informed the boy who nodded and headed for the front door.

"You ready?" Sam asked Callen as they headed towards the door the boy had pointed to.

"NCIS, Mr. Wilson. Let the boy go and we can talk," Callen called.

"No! I haven't touched him. My wife is a liar. She took my son from me. I didn't mean to kill him. He was my boy and I loved him. She turned him against me. You don't raise a boy in a heathen household."

Callen's hand shook slightly at the words the man was using.

"Mr. Wilson...let your grandson go, no one needs to get hurt. Just open the door now and let us see that he's safe."

"I do that and you'll shoot me." The man's voice shook from behind the door, "Tell them you're safe Greg...my boy... _my G_ …."

"HELP ME!" Greg Wilson screamed and then there was a thud as something hit a wall with a resounding smack.

With a nod of agreement, Callen walked to the door and tried the handle.

Opening it slowly, keeping low just in case he was shot at as he entered.

A gray haired, older man was leaning over the still body of a child. His hands holding a cloth to his head.

"I didn't mean it….you sinned boy." He whispered to the boy's still form, "I just wanted to show you God's love."

Callen's body _literally_ shook as the words filled the room.

"Mr. Wilson...step away from the child and show us your hands," Callen ordered.

The old man stood and started to turn, concealing the gun in his hand.

"Well hello boy." His face went from that of a worried old man to a lecherous leer in less than a second. "G. Callen...welcome home."

Sam looked over at Callen's white face.

" _Bill?"_


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

"Bill?"

Callen lowered the gun, not wanting or not willing to shoot him.

"G?" Sam called worried for the change in his partner.

"Take the boy Sam, get him to safety." Callen said his voice flat as he turned to Bill, "You'll let him go now won't you?"

Bill hadn't taken his eyes of G the entire time and nodded, "You can tell them can't you boy, you can tell them they were wrong."

"Go Sam," Callen said softly.

Sam grabbed the injured boy on the ground and carried him outside to his mother, looking back only once, as the door closed behind him and the lock clicked.

* * *

With every step he took away from the house Sam felt more and more helpless. "Eric, I need an ambulance, and information on Bill and Sheila Wilson, we need an address for her, and get Kensi and Deeks to pick her up."

The boy in Sam's arms started to stir.

"Mommy?" He called.

"Greg...baby. It's ok Mommy's here." Wendy called as she climbed out of the car and went to him. She looked at Sam with tears running down his face, "I didn't know I swear! He seemed like such a nice man. How could I not have seen this?"

Sam gently lay Greg down as Wendy rolled up her jacket to use as a pillow for her son's head.

"It's not your fault." Sam said, "Stay with him an ambulance is on the way."

"Is he dead? Bill I mean." She asked looking back at the house.

Sam shook his head, "Don't worry about it, Other Agents are looking for your mother in law, you just concentrate on your boys, go with the paramedics when they get here. we'll contact you later." Sam reassured her, then resolutely he turned and walked into the house.

"Mr. Hanna," Hetty's voice interrupted him as he was about to climb the stairs again. "Where is Mr. Callen, he is not replying to his com."

"He's with the suspect, he sent me out with the boy to get him medical help." Sam tried keeping the worry out of his voice but Hetty heard it nonetheless.

"You need to get him out of there as soon as possible. Do not leave him alone with the suspect any longer than you have to. Do you hear me Mr. Hanna?"

"I'm on my way back there now. But he's an old man and it's only been about three minutes he can't hurt him."

Back in ops Hetty shook her head sadly, "He already has Mr. Hanna."

She waited pulling up Nell's empty chair and sitting down as the duo busied themselves around her, not wanting to be further from her boy than needs be. She had hoped that this part of his past, the part which had warped his sense of right and wrong, in the sense of he didn't understand real love. Could have been kept where it belonged, buried in the past. She had watched from the sidelines as Callen had gone down the slippery slope towards oblivion culminating in his stint in Juvenile detention, before she had found it necessary to intercede on his behalf to save him.

She had sat many a night listening to him scream down the hall, once or twice calling Bill's name and begging for forgiveness. Not once had he opened up to her or told her about it. She had tried, she had paid for therapists to try. But on the subject of his stay with the McPherson family Callen had remained silent. When he was awake anyway. His fervent cries of apology to Sheila, his pleas and apologies, begging for Bill to come back and love him broke her heart at night.

Now she was faced with the knowledge that he was facing the man who had hurt her boy and she wasn't there.

* * *

"Bill." Callen said again as the man turned his sidearm dropping from his hand in shock as Bill looked over following Sam to the door, closing and locking it.

"Don't go." Callen heard himself say before he could stop it.

Bill smiled, after all these years the man was even more beautiful than the boy had been, and still had that current of insecurity. It was hidden well, but it was still there.

"I am not going anywhere." Bill promised, "It's been a long time boy, let me look at you."

Callen flushed as Bill looked him over. He knew, somewhere deep down inside he knew what Bill had done to him was wrong. If it had been another child he would have said that. But Bill was special, Bill loved him...didn't he?

"You need to come with me." Callen said, trying to make his hand move and pick up his gun. He had never, ever dropped his gun before, what the hell was going on?

"Maybe later," Bill replied with a leer. "Is that how you address me when I am alone in a room with you boy?"

Callen swayed, he wanted to please Bill more than anything, but Sam...Sam was his SEAL...Sam was his lifeline, what he had with Sam was love...this...this with Bill was wrong. It was wrong? It had to be wrong? But why did it feel right?

"I...Master...I…"

Bill smiled, it was still there. Callen had been his best. The last one he had had in a long time after that bitch of an ex-wife caught him. But none he'd had since had measured up to the terrified ten year old who was longing to be loved.

"Kneel boy, remind me how much you want me to love you."

Callen dropped, his body instantly reacting and his mind swirling. He started to rise but Bill had picked up Callen's gun and placed it against his head.

"You grew up boy, you think you've learned somethings….but you will always be my boy."

Callen shook his head, tears he couldn't hold falling. He was _**not**_ Bills boy, he was Sam's Brat...Sam was his SEAL. They had both wanted it, it had not been forcibly taken...like…

"You...you _raped_ me!" Callen actually realized that Bill had forced him and it wasn't, hadn't been his fault.

"You asked me too, it wasn't rape boy, you asked for my love. I gave you what you needed, what you still need." Bill snarled.

Callen shook his head, " No Sir, I don't need you." The unspoken but I need Sam, plea when across his mind.

" _No!_ _Not_ sir. Not _here._ Here I am your Master. Only here and only with me will you ever say that word. You will _never_ say it outside of _this room._ You will not leave this room without my permission and you will _NOT_ talk to anyone else without my permission. _**Do you understand, Boy?**_ " Bill snapped pulling Callen instantly back to his childhood and that room.

Callen was fighting the emotions that were overwhelming him and his body was sweating and shaking from the exherstion of it all.

Callen looked confused, Bills face softened and he bent down to Callen and kissed him gently. "Boy you are mine and this is how you earn my love _and_ God's love. You follow the rules, you behave and that way we can love you. You want to be loved don't you? He liked the fact that his past was replaying again and Callen seemed to be falling for it.

* * *

For a moment he did, till the movement of the floorboards underneath him bounced with Sam's step in the hallway outside the room, and brought him back to the here and now.

Callen brought his head up with a slight smirk, "Not by _you_. _Never_ by _you_."

He brought Bill down in a heap as he swept his leg out, knocking the older man to the ground, struggling for the gun. He managed to overpower the older man and held the gun to his head.

"You did things to a child that should never have been done, you...you destroyed me...you…" He shook as he realized he was just as damaged as Bill was, "You made me just like you."

Bill smiled, "It's only a matter of time. one day you'll find someone as beautiful as you were boy. It wasn't my fault, you know that right? You begged me to love you, and I did. No one has ever loved you like it did."

Callen was vaguely aware of Sam shouting his name as he put his finger on the trigger aiming it at Bills head.

"You know any nice young boys yet? Do you friends know, your colleagues, that you are as twisted as I am? Do they know what you are like deep down, do they know how I made you?"

Callen shook his head in denial, "I'm not...not like that."

Bill smiled up at him, "No matter what you are now, you will always be my boy and I made you exactly what you are...you will never be worthy of anyone's love like I love you."

Callen pulled the gun to Bill temple and went to pull the trigger as Sam clicked the door down with a spray of splinters.

"G...Stop!" Sam shouted.

Callen stepped away dropping the gun, "Cuff him Sam." He sighed, this would be his last job for NCIS, he knew that the second Bill opened his mouth he was done for, there was nothing left anymore. At least though the boy was safe and no child would ever get near Bill again.

"Take him away." Callen ordered, in his mind, doing his last act as the team leader.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Callen said nothing the whole ride to the boatshed. Not even daring to glance in the mirror as Bill sat in the backseat.

"Out!" Sam snapped as they arrived and took Bill through to the interrogation room.

Kensi and Deeks looked up as the man was brought in and Bill pulled up short as he saw the older woman sitting at the main table drinking a cup of tea.

"You helping them bitch." Bill snarled.

Sheila flinched as Sam pushed Bill past her and off to the interrogation room.

"I'm sorry." Kensi said as she moved to shield the woman's view.

Sheila shook her head, "I can't believe I loved him once, he betrayed me in the worst way a man could ever."

Callen stood inside the door, just looking at her. He hadn't said a word and although she had glanced at him, she hadn't recognised him. For that he was grateful.

Kensi opened her mouth to call him and he cut her off.

"Put Mrs. _Wilson,_ in interrogation room two." He said coldly.

"But…" Kensi started.

They had been told she was a victim not a suspect.

"Hetty is on her way to talk to…" Deeks said.

"I said put her in room two." Callen's voice was hard and cold.

Kensi looked confused, but she looked to the older woman, "Would you mind?" she asked politely.

The woman had been nothing but accommodating ever since she had heard the news that her ex-husband was seeing her son and grandsons. She didn't understand the stance that Callen was taking, but he was her team leader and she would follow his lead.

"Of course dear," Sheila said and Callen snorted in derision as she stood up.

"I'm sorry, did I say something wrong?" She asked.

Callen shook his head and walked into interrogation room two and waited as she sat down.

* * *

"I am sorry Agent…?"

"You should be." Callen snapped. "You _knew_ what your husband was like, why did you never warn your son, or his wife when they had children?"

"I never knew." Sheila said embarrassed.

" **LIAR**." Callen thumped the table and made her jump.

Sheila looked up at the man. "Agent...I'm sorry they didn't tell me your name, You don't know me. I am a god-fearing woman, I do not lie."

Again Callen snorted. "Yeah right."

"You _knew_ that Bill Wilson was a pedophile, you _knew_ what he had done to boys in your care, it's the reason you left him. The reason you left a destroyed child and did nothing to help him. You walked out, called child services and left the child to believe that the actions perpetrated on him, was all his fault."

"That's not true, I left Bill because he was having an affair."

" _ **DON'T LIE!**_ " Callen yelled thumping the table again, "You knew, you put your grandsons in danger, you are as much at fault as Wilson is."

"No…" The old woman sobbed, "It's not true."

"Look me in the eye, tell **_ME_ ** that you didn't know what Bill did to boy's in your care. Tell **_ME_ ** that you didn't leave because you caught him in bed with a ten year old in your care."

"I...I didn't I… How?"

She looked at him hard. "Who are you?"

"It doesn't matter." Callen replied, "Why did you wait till your grandsons were ten and eight before you told your son? You say you left your husband, but you didn't leave him straight after the incident in 1980 did you. You changed your name with him, didn't you Mrs. Wilson."

"I...I was pregnant, I couldn't be a single mother, but when I had a son...I couldn't stay with Bill, I couldn't let my son be hurt like…"

"But it was ok for children who weren't yours."

"I loved the kids we had placed with us."

"So, did, Bill." Callen growled out and turned away from her.

"It wasn't his fault." Sheila said quietly.

Callen clenched his fists but didn't turn back. "How long did you know that he was touching boys in your care."

Sheila shook her head. "It wasn't boys… just this one, Bill swore he hadn't meant it, but the boy was like that, so needy and touching him. This boy turned him. He swore he wouldn't do it again, we sent the boy back. Some children just lie about stuff like that you know?"

"No I don't!" Callen snarled slamming the folder onto the table. "You think a child would lie about that?" Callen asked gulping as a lump formed in his throat.

"The social worker told me that the boy lied, you don't know what he was like. He was trouble, they aren't all good kids you know."

Callen gripped the back of the chair his knuckles going white.

He couldn't move and he couldn't look at her.

"I thought _you_ were nice." He breathed.

She looked up at him, the agent before her looked hurt and angry.

"Do I know you?" she asked.

Callen shook his head, "Apparently not." he replied as he walked to the door.

Just before he got there the door opened and a small woman stood at the door. The Agent looked chastised, "Hetty...I?"

"Mr. Callen, outside please." she said.

Sheila looked worried.

"I...Hetty, I didn't…?" He shook his head, not having moved from the spot.

"Sam needs you." She said softly, "Go see him."

Callen nodded and walked out of the room as Hetty moved in.

For a moment he stood outside the door listening.

"Please...can you tell me his name?" Sheila asked Hetty as she sat down.

"That is Agent G. Callen." Hetty said.

"G for?" Sheila hoped that Hetty would not say the words that she came out with next.

"Just G, he grew up in the cold yet well meaning embrace of the foster care system and no one ever told him his name."

As G walked away from the door all he could hear was sobbing.

* * *

At the end of the corridor, G turned about to go towards the other interrogation room where Bill sat, but a hand on his arm stopped him.

"G." Sam said, "No...Granger is coming to interrogate him, Kensi and Deeks will be watching. I need you with me."

"But….Where are we going?" Callen asked.

Sam smiled, "Important debriefing."

Callen was still in a daze and followed without complaint. He sat in Sam's car, paying no attention to where they were going until the car stopped.

"Where are we?"

"Ocean Drive, Santa Monica." Sam walked up to the house with G following.

Turning away he smiled and knocked on the door.

There was no reply. As he knew there wouldn't be. He looked at G. You wanna pick the lock, looks like no one's in.

Callen nodded, still not sure what they were doing. He opened the door and drew his gun. They started clearing the house.

Callen moved ahead, as Sam held back, as soon as he was out of sight, Sam ran back outside and got the bags from the car.

Callen's last call of "Clear!" rang though the house as he got back.

"Good." Sam smiled as walked up behind Callen, turning him and pinning him to the wall, his hands on his shoulders.

"What the Hell Sam?" Callen tried to wriggle out of his grip.

"Need to debrief, remember?" Sam reminded him.

"Who?" Callen asked.

"You." Sam breathed and took him in a heady kiss.

For a moment Callen fought back, then he lost himself in Sam. Sam's touch, his taste, his scent, his safety.

"Sam…" G breathed as Sam kissed his neck tenderly paying attention to the area where his neck joined his shoulder.

Sam stopped and stepped back.

"On your knees, Brat." Sam ordered.

"Here?" Callen asked. He couldn't here, this was a suspect's home.

"This is ours for as long as we need it. All expenses paid."

"But…"

"Brat!" Sam changed his tone and Callen instantly dropped to his knees feeling himself getting hard.

"Bill Wilson." Sam said.

Callen shook his head. "No."

"You will tell me." Sam said gently.

Callen shook his head vehemently. "No...can't tell Sam. Not that please, don't ask me."

"Who am I?" Sam asked.

Callen sobbed and hiccoughed, "My...My SEAL, My safety...my life… but I… I can't Sam."

Sam stroked G's head his hand going down to cup G's chin. He lifted it to look into Callen's cerulean eyes.

"Do you trust me?" Sam asked.

Callen nodded, "With my life."

"What about your heart?" Sam asked.

"My…?"

"What happened with Bill, with his ex-wife in interrogation. You are holding back I need to know."

Callen stood up, shaking in anger, "Fuck you Sam."

"Not yet." Sam deadpanned, "You need to tell me."

"NO!"

"G, you need to talk to someone, if not me then maybe Hetty." Sam waited the hand on Callen's shoulder slowly moving down his back.

"Come sit here." He patted to the large yellow couch in the terrace overlooking the ocean."

Callen sat with Sam sitting next to him.

For a moment he looked out across the road, over the beach, to where the ocean waves were crashing against the shore.

"I...I can't do it." Callen said, "I can't do this anymore."

For a moment Sam's heart clenched. "Do what?"

"I lost my edge Sam. A child was hurt...Bill… he…." Callen couldn't get the words out.

"You knew him a long time ago didn't you." Sam said, it was not a question and he felt Callen flinch.

"Bill and Sheila...were my foster parents. The McPhersons, remember...I told you about them, when the Comescu's came and killed Reinhardt ."

Sam looked over to a corner and gave an imperceptible nod, knowing that at some point Hetty would be watching and would finally know what they had both suspected.

"It's gonna come out Sam, everyone is gonna know. I should have shot him, I shouldn't have dropped my guard, but Bill, he...he did this to me. He made me like this. He was the first." The last sentence was a whisper.

"Your first?"

"The first, the first person to love me. Only...I know now, it wasn't love, was it...it was rape." He hung his head and only after a moment did Sam realize that Callen was silently sobbing.

Not caring that Hetty might see, Sam wrapped his arm around Callen's shoulder and pulled his partner to him for comfort.

"NO!" Callen pulled away and started pacing the room, "You don't understand Sam. I thought it was love...It was love, but it's not...I don't understand. I'm a 45 year old man and I don't understand." He paced unconsciously rubbing his forefinger and thumbs together furiously, an unconscious gesture.

"G." Sam stood and rested his hands on Callen's shoulders. "Talk to me, tell me what is bugging you."

"I thought I…. I mean, if that's not love, how can I love you? Am I wrong? I can't be second guessing myself all the time, I can't be a federal agent, I'm just like Bill!"

Callen wrenched himself away from Sam, threw open the door and ran into the road, narrowly missing a passing car and running onto the sand.

Leaving a stunned Sam standing there and watching him go.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Sam sighed as he closed the phone.

He hadn't taken his eyes of Callen the whole time he'd been talking with Hetty.

Callen looked the figure of dejection, his knees drawn up to his chest and his head bowed. He wasn't even looking at the ocean that was shimmering green/blue in front of him. His shoulders were hunched and his whole posture screamed depression.

He had explained to Hetty what had gone on in Callen's head. How he had thought that his love was wrong, Hetty in turn told him all she had managed to learn from both Bill and Sheila before they had been taken by the LAPD into custody.

Sam sank down onto the chair, he had suspected as much. Mostly from the ramblings Bill had spewed in the back seat of the challenger on their way to the boatshed, but also from the reaction Callen himself had had when he'd seen the man. Bill in turn, had given into Granger's questioning, he'd admitted he was part of a peodphile ring.

However he wasn't responsible for the death of his son. Gunnery Sergeant Wilson's killer was still out there.

Sam was angry, all of that effort, and still no killer. He was glad that Wilson had been stopped, but now it needed to go further and Nell was looking into the ring that Bill had admitted to being a part of.

His gaze darkened as he looked across the street to his partner's form, thinking about how unfair it was that he had had this done to him as a child. For a moment Callen looked up and locked eyes on Sam. Within seconds his head dropped.

Sam knew he still looked angry. His eyes widened in horror as he realized that Callen must be thinking he was mad with him.

Sam dropped the phone on the glass topped boat that had been turned into a coffee table and headed across the street.

Callen looked up as there was a sound of screeching brakes.

He saw Sam move as a van nearly ran him over. He stood up in horror as the doors opened and two men with machine guns manhandled him into the back of the van, Sam desperately trying to get away, one man pointed the automatic in the direction of Callen and with a resigned, but sad look towards his partner, Sam climbed into the van as Callen started running in the van's direction.

"SAM!" He yelled as the van sped off.

He pulled his phone out and called Eric. "Eric camera's on Ocean Drive, Santa Monica. Dark blue transit van, Sam's been ...taken." He choked on the last word, sending the Agent in Distress code he had for Sam.

* * *

Less than ten minutes later, and at least two extra speeding tickets to his name, Callen walked into Ops.

He wouldn't even look at Granger who looked at him with something akin to pity in his eyes.

"Eric, what have you got?" Callen asked a tight ball of fear in his gut.

Nell stood in front of the large screen, "We've back tracked the van to a parking lot in south central LA."

"I don't wanna know where it was, I wanna know where it is." Callen growled.

Eric stepped in front of Nell as if to protect her. "We don't know, the van went down Ocean drive, it turned into a residential street and we lost it."

"We tried Sam's cell phone, it's still registering as being inside a house near to where he was taken."

Callen nodded, his hands balled into fists.

"There has to be something? Is there anything to say why Sam was targeted?"

"Could it be connected with the Wilson case?" Deeks asked.

"No." Callen shut him down, but the more he thought about it, the more he thought it might be connected.

"What about the ring that Wilson mentioned about, do you know anything about that?" Granger asked standing right in front of Callen.

"Why would you think I knew anything about that?" Callen snapped.

"I talked to Mr. Wilson…" Granger started.

Callen stepped up to Granger, everyone in ops stopped as they focused on the rage rolling off the senior agent.

"So you want me to question him again?" Callen snarled. "Give him a thrill and hope he'll talk?"

Granger opened his mouth to reply but Callen stormed out of the building Granger close on his heels.

"Agent Callen!" He called as Callen hit the main hallway.

Callen turned his head for a moment, but didn't stop striding purposely out of the building and roared off in Sam's challenger.

Granger turned to Deeks and Kensi, "Go find Sam's wife, fill her in on what's going on?"

They nodded and headed out to Kensi's car. Granger got in his car and headed to the boatshed.

* * *

Callen got there about three minutes before Granger did.

He walked into the boatshed and slammed the door open to the interrogation room.

"He's not here." Hetty said quietly sitting at the table with a file in front of her. "Sit down."

"Sam's missing!" Callen almost turned to leave.

"I know about Mr. Hanna, but I need some answers from you."

"What answers?!" Callen exclaimed, "What could I possibly know that is more important than finding Sam?"

"I don't know, but someone thinks that you do." Hetty said opening the file in front of her.

Callen stood not willing to move.

"This is linked to the Wilson case, you have the information we need to catch Gunnery Sergeant Wilson's killer and hopefully find Sam."

"I don't know anything Hetty…" Callen slumped in the other chair feeling defeated. "I don't...If I knew, I'd be there with Sam now, getting him back, telling him I…" He put his head in his hands a feeling of dread washing over him, "They took Sam because of me, didn't they?"

"I think so." Hetty stopped as the door behind Callen opened.

"Agent Callen, I need to question you regarding your time with Mr. Wilson as a child."

Callen shook his head, "Never lived with a guy called Wilson."

He shot a worried look at the camera.

"This will be between us Agent Callen, we need you to be honest, more honest than when you were a child."

Callen physically shook.

There was nothing he could do, he had held it in for so long, now to save Sam he would have to rip out the most closely guarded piece of his soul. But to save Sam, he was willing to do it. There was one roadblock, Hetty. He couldn't not in front of her and his throat closed him.

"I will wait outside." Hetty walked out, but turned when she got to the door, "No one blames you Mr. Callen, but you might be able to help us save Sam." She closed the door and Callen found himself on the wrong side of the table facing Owen Granger.

* * *

Sam struggled at his bonds.

"Now now, I know you were military, Marine right?" The man guessed.

Sam shook his head, "Navy SEAL, and as soon as I'm out of here I'll kick your ass." Sam promised.

"Someone's ass is gonna get something." The man replied with a leer, "But not yours."

"What the hell does that mean?" Sam snarled.

"You shouldn't have arrested my brother. My stupid nephew stuck his nose where it wasn't wanted and he ended up dead because of it." The man paced around the front of Sam and looked him up and down, "The boy's got good taste...tell me does he still scream and struggle when you tie him up?"

"What?" Sam shook his head confused.

"Our boy, he was our first, didn't he tell you. Oh he just loves it when you smack him around first. He was our greatest, he even went as far as to be the demonstration model for our entire business. Oh the memories," Sam looked sickened as the man's trousers tightened at whatever sick thoughts were going through his mind.

"I'm not like that." Sam growled.

The man threw back his head and laughed, "Do you think we wouldn't keep an eye on our greatest asset. We know how he has grown, what we trained him to need. We know you are his greatest weakness." The man raised his foot and placed it on Sam's balls, making the man wince with pain as he put pressure there.

"The question is, will be keep his mouth shut to save you." He moved his foot and released the pressure as a small tear left Sam's eyes. The man paid him no attention and he walked over to his cell phone. "I want his number...now." He ordered.

"No." Sam shook his head.

The man walked over to Sam and placed his foot back on his balls and pushed harder.

"That all you got." Sam growled.

"Oh no…" The man smiled, "I can be very creative." He walked over to a table and opened a bag.

He pulled out a knife and cut the front of Sam's trousers.

"Back off Perv." Sam growled.

"You'll appreciate this, we did this on your boy a long long time ago, we found it most effective."

Sam watched in horror as the man thrust his hand down his underwear and released his cock and balls from their confinement. "Get off!"

The man smiled and turned away for a moment busying himself at the table.

"Now," He said, his voice turning almost sexual, as he turned back and Sam's eyes widened in horror.

The man turned back with a soldering iron and solder in his hands as Sam struggled against his bonds in the chair, unfortunately the chair was bolted to the ground.

He pulled the iron and held it over Sam's cock and touched the solder to the red hot tip. Sam screamed as the liquid metal fell onto the exposed skin.

"STOP!" Sam panted as the pain made him pull into himself.

"Number. Now." He ordered.

Sam felt as if he had just betrayed Callen, but the pain was more than anything he had ever experienced before.

He sobbed as he gave him Callen's number.

* * *

Granger looked at the file and the agent before him.

"I have the report from child services and the police, from when you were with the Mcphersons."

"I said everything then." Callen snapped, not looking at Granger.

"Obviously not," Granger said about to open the file, "Bill Wilson didn't kill his son. Who do you know would have wanted Bill's son dead?"

"I don't know, I never even met Bill's son."

"Tell me about Bill, what happened when you were ten?"

Callen looked nervously around. Although he knew he had held something back, there was no way it could affect what was going on now. He couldn't go there.

Granger opened the file, he winced slightly as he read the medical report on Callen that the police had given to child services.

"This is the medical report from the rape kit run on you after you were removed from the McPhersons."

Callen slammed the file shut, "You have no right to look at that! We should be trying to find Sam, not wasting time here."

"Callen, all the information you give to me now should help with finding the men who have taken Sam. He's your partner and his family will be worried. You want to help find him don't you?"

"Of course I do!"

Callen took the file from Granger and with a shaking hand he opened it. "The kit was positive, I know that." He said softly, "At least three different samples, may be more."

Granger waited as Callen looked at the file tracing his finger over the picture of a blank, but tired face, of a traumatized ten year old. "I was terrified in this picture, I thought I was being punished." He said aloud.

Granger pushed down the confusion and the anger he felt at that statement.

"What happened while you were there? Who apart from Bill did you meet?"

Callen opened his mouth to answer when the phone rang.

"Callen." He said for a moment pleased that he didn't have to talk to Granger.

"You wanna see your partner again, you better remember your promise boy. You are as much in this as we are. One word and I swear…." Callen blanched as he heard Sam scream on the other side of the phone, he bit the inside of his cheek and clenched his thighs to stop himself jumping up and screaming, knowing that Granger was watching him.

"You wanna save him, you know where I will be, your favorite spot, come alone. Anyone else comes and they will all know how twisted you really are."

Callen said nothing as he closed the phone.

"Agent Callen?" Granger asked.

"I need something to drink, Can I get a coffee?" He asked.

Granger nodded, "Stay here, I'll get you one." He stood up and walked out.

It only took Callen moments to gather himself. He took the photos from the file and ripped them to pieces. Leaving his cell phone, badge and gun on the table, he opened the trapdoor and within seconds he was gone.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Nick McPherson looked at Sam, after all he had done to the man, he was still defiant.

Granted he was sweating with pain, and soon, if untreated those wounds would be infected.

He had had a call from his brother, worried and shakily telling him he'd been arrested and sent to county lock up.

Nick, as the elder brother, promised to deal with it. He knew the only way they could make the charges stick against his little brother was for that Agent to make a statement. He had followed Callen's career diligently, knowing that the man who had been their first boy, knew far too much. Although, had Nick been a gambling man, he would have bet that his first run in with Callen had caused the boy so much fear there was no way he would voluntarily tell anyone what had happened when he was a child.

One thing he did know was that he had trained that boy well.

* * *

Callen shook his head, water droplets dripping from his face. He peeled off his T-shirt and wrung it out, pulling it back on and hoping he wouldn't catch a cold. But the sun was quite warm and he hoped that his clothes would dry soon. More importantly though his thoughts were focused on one goal. Finding Sam.

He took his wallet out of his back pocket, the little cash he had was ruined beyond saving. However his bank card was fine. Knowing he only had a small amount of time before they had Eric or Nell track him, he walked to the nearest ATM machine and took out as much as the card would allow. It would have to do. Then he broke the bank card up and threw it in the trash.

Walking into a thrift store nearby, he purchased a change of clothes, smiling at the clerk and explaining he'd had a fight with his wife and she'd chucked water at him.

He emerged a few minutes later, wearing dry clothes and a ball cap to hide his face. He dumped his wet clothes in the trash and took off his watch. That hurt the most, Sam had given him the watch for his birthday and had told him it had a GPS chip in it in case he ever went missing. He wasn't sure if Sam had been joking or not, but right now he couldn't take the chance.

He walked through the holiday makers and crowds of shoppers trying to make sure he wasn't spotted on any security cameras. He couldn't afford to be.

He had thought about taking a cab, but that would take money he didn't have and both cabs and public transport had cameras that he could be traced on. There was nothing for it but for him to steal a car. After all, after this he'd be going to jail anyway when they found out his part in the whole thing.

He stole a beat up looking green Honda and headed in the direction that he hoped, Sam was being held.

* * *

Granger walked back into the office, balancing another file and two coffees in his hands.

"Hetty found some information we need you to corroborate." He looked up and realized he was talking to an empty room.

"Damn…" He put the coffee and the file on the table and figured that Callen must have gone to the bathroom, then he saw the open trapdoor.

Sighing he walked out to the main room where Hetty was sitting.

"Problem Owen?" She asked.

"Callen's gone."

"Bugger." Hetty cursed and walked to the monitor. "Mr. Beale." she called.

"Yes Hetty." He replied instantly on the screen.

"I need you to track down Agent Callen. Check Camera's and his GPS in his watch."

"On it." Eric turned to complete his task as Nell shot him a worried look and went to help him.

"Oh and Mr. Beale, if that does not work. Look up a file, Callen82 I will give you the code when and if you need it. You can follow the instructions in there."

"What is it?" Nell asked as she took note of Hetty's instructions.

"It is a chip." Hetty didn't elaborate, and hoped she wouldn't have to tell them that she'd had him chipped as a child.

He had been 12 when he'd been beaten by a foster father and had run away from foster care with a broken arm which had, after they had found him three weeks later, had to be broken and reset by surgery. To make sure that this didn't happen again, Hetty had arranged for the surgeons to implant a tracking chip in his arm when they had pinned and rewired the bones together.

* * *

Callen drove through the streets of Bakersfield, barely recognising the places he had been as a child until he turned into Union Street.

He sat in the car, the engine idling away as he willed his hands to stop shaking. He looked at the single storey converted trailer, on the huge expanse of land. The one building he had vowed never to revisit.

He drove closer, parking outside.

Sam was in there, he knew it as much as he knew that going in there and facing this would probably kill him.

But losing Sam, that was not an option. Michelle, Kamran and Aiden needed Sam just as much as he did, maybe...well no actually they deserved Sam. He didn't...not anymore.

He knew that the second he stepped out of that car, all bets were off.

For a moment he couldn't move. He grabbed the steering wheel and willed the shaking to stop. He couldn't stop the tears, some of shame and some of regret that spilled from his eyes.

He got out, relieved that in this part of Bakersfield there were no cameras, he remembered this was why Nick and Bill loved this place.

Considering it had been more than thirty years since he had first been taken kicking and screaming up the long pathway to the house, he was surprised to find it looked exactly the same.

More than anything he wished he was armed as, with his legs shaking he walked up to the front door.

For a moment he stopped, looking at a small trace of blood and a dent in the doorframe, faded from years of being sunbaked and weathered, to him though it was as clear as the day that Nick McPherson had caught him trying to escape from the horror that was hidden inside the ordinary, but shabby looking house.

He stood there unable to move, fleeting memories of pain and screaming going through his head. He shook his head to clear it and came face to face with his worse nightmare.

* * *

"Hello boy." Nick leered as he stood there holding a gun in Callen's face.

G blanched and raised his hands.

"I'm here, now let Sam go."

"Awww. So brave… inside now!" he ordered.

Sam looked up, pulling on the chains that were linked to a small pot bellied stove in the corner of the room. He was sweating as infection from his burns started ravaging his body.

"G?!" Sam gasped in shock, "No, you need to go G."

Callen moved over and dropped to his knees, his hands checking to see if Sam was injured.

"What did he do to you, are you ok?"

Sam moved uncomfortably, trying to hide the rip in his pants.

Callen's eyes tightened in anger as he saw a hint of the damage that Nick had done to Sam.

He whipped his head back at Nick, "You promised," He hissed.

"You're late." Nick replied.

Sam looked confused at the exchange his look changed to disbelief as Callen stood up, hiding the shaking of his hands by rubbing them on his jeans.

"I got waylaid, I had to dump my phone so I couldn't call."

"G? You know this son of a bitch?" Sam asked.

Callen ignored him for a moment.

"Nick, you promised to let him go." Callen said his voice strong.

"Maybe later."

Callen balled his fists up wanting to launch into the man, Nick raised his gun, "Not yet boy."

Callen's gut dropped, "Not here, please...not in front of Sam." He begged.

"Down boy."

Callen dropped to his knees, tears streaming down his face in humiliation.

"STOP!" Sam struggled against his bonds trying to get to Callen.

"Don't...please." Callen whispered his head still bowed.

"Don't do this too him! What do you want?" Sam asked.

"I _want_ what is mine." Nick walked over to Callen and ran his hand from his head to his shoulder smiling as Callen flinched.

"He's not a thing, he's a federal agent." Sam argued pulling again at his chains.

"Yeah, not for long." Nick laughed as he put his hand down the v neck of Callen's shirt, smiling as Callen shuddered in revulsion.

"Should we share with your partner just how warped you are little boy?" Nick asked as Callen's jaw clenched.

He wanted to scream, to hit him, to do anything but he couldn't. He was too conditioned to say anything without permission. It had been a long time, but the touches along with his old Master's voice had him following orders without question.

"Don't move." Nick said as he walked over to Sam, "Time for relocation for you." He uncuffed Sam and got him to a standing position, re-cuffing him and putting the gun in his hand to Sam's head.

"Walk, boy follow me."

Without a word Callen followed them until he reached what looked like a closet door. Nick stopped and nudged Sam with the gun, "Open the door."

"No!" Callen mumbled, "Please Sir...Don't…"

" _Quiet boy._ "

Sam looked over at him, he had seen many many emotions on his partners face over the years, anger, sadness, joy, sorrow; but until this moment he had never, ever seen terror on his partners face.

"What is this place G?" Sam asked.

Nick smiled, "Tell him boy."

"H...Home Sir."

* * *

The door opened and there was a shuffling noise in the dark.

"NO…" G breathed in horror as he realized what the noise was.

Sam blinked as the light was switched on and a handful of boys, between the ages of eight and eleven went scurrying into the corner, all assuming the same position that Callen had upstairs.

"Boys' we have a special guest here today." Nick said as he refastened Sam's cuffs to a long iron pipe.

"Yes Sir," they said as one, not one looking up as him.

"You've heard tell of the boy, the original one, that you are all unworthy replacements for, the boy with no name. Well!" Nick walked by each blond haired, blue eyed boy one by one and pulled their heads up by their hair to look at the man standing next to the one cuffed to the pipe, "Boys, this is G."

Their eyes widened in horror as they realized that the boy they had been told about was real.

"Sir, let the boys go...please." Callen's gut was turning, this was not what he expected. By now he expected to be dead. He had to rethink his whole plan. Now he needed to say the four boys and Sam. "Please, I'll do anything."

"Later, later…" He grabbed one of the boys by the hair, "Which one are you?" Nick asked.

The boy was shaking in fear, but he knew better than to not speak, "M, Sir."

Nick smiled, "Perfect. Stay." he said.

"Home boys." Nick said to the others and they scrambled into a large crate which had taken over the opposite side of the room. Callen stood, he shook as his body wanted to do as ordered, but the rational part was stopping him, he could almost hear Sam, ordering him not to move.

Nick walked over to him and slapped him around the face, jolting him out of his musings.

"You...you get the punishment cage, you need retraining." Nick pushed him to a cage further around the back, Callen tripped over the bar on the floor and fell face first into the cage, shuddering as the door was shut with a clang.

Callen grabbed the bars as Nick walked over to the terrified boy on the floor.

"Nooooo!" He shook the bars, desperately trying to get out.

"M. Everything i do to you tonight will be G's fault, he has disobeyed, he thought he could be a normal person. He is property that is all, he broke the rules, now...You will be punished for his mistake."

Callen shook the bars harder as Sam looked on confused and the other boys huddled together, comforting each other all sightly grateful that none of them were M right now.

* * *

As the door shut Callen dropped to his knees.

"G?" Sam whispered, "Who is that?"

"His name is...Sir." Callen said, his fear rapidly being overtaken by his anger.

"Are….are you really, the G?" The oldest of the boys in the cage asked.

Callen nodded.

"And….and you escaped, right?" The boy asked.

Callen looked away, he had but he didn't know if he would be able to help them.

"What are your names?" Sam asked.

"I'm J." said the eldest boy.

"I'm Z." said another.

"K." said the third.

The youngest looked up, "I'm S... I used to be Sam too."

The others pushed him, "You know you can't use that! You'll be punished."

J stood as much as the cramped quarters would allow him, "Please Sir, don't tell...S is new, he's only been here a few weeks, he still needs to be trained."

"What about your parents, aren't they looking for you?"

"We don't have parents, boys here never have parents. We are sent from the group homes, by a trainer."

"There are adults in the group homes that send you here?" Sam looked shocked, but the reply shocked him to the core.

"Of course not Sir, The master trains us. The good ones get to go back to the group home and select new boys to take his place. It's always been like that. We are told, it was the idea of the first boy. It was his plan." J said poking a shaking finger at Callen who looked away in shame.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Callen turned his back on them and slumped down in the cage as screaming started to filter down from upstairs.

"G?" Sam struggled at his bonds. "G, is this true?"

Callen turned at Sam, the look in his eyes nearly broke Sam's heart.

"I...I think it is, I...don't remember, not all of it." Callen replied in a raspy whisper.

"They tell us all the time." J said. "The first G, he came to Sir's brother, he asked for it. He begged for what they gave him, he appreciated it."

Callen's shoulders tensed as he listened to the boy.

"He was the best pupil Sir ever had. He had to go away for a while, but Sir found him and taught him, then he got older and while at the group home he contacted Sir, would send them what they needed."

"It wasn't like that." Callen snapped.

Sam swallowed a lump in his throat. "G talk to me."

Callen shook his head, "No…" He concentrated on something in front of him keeping his back to Sam.

Callen was broken, he knew this. Memories he had managed to successfully block were popping up to the surface. Memories of him with Sir, him being sent to the group home. Being picked up the first day there by Sir, who had told him his plan, how he would still be loved and how others could be loved too if Callen would only help him.

He hadn't know what had happened to the boys, he had known that they had been 'adopted' and he had assumed that they had gone onto a happy life, being loved as he had been promised. He also knew that no one would believe it.

Moving as close as his chains would allow him to, Sam called over to Callen. "G, please."

Callen turned and concentrated on the lock, "Shh…" he said.

"G you need to talk to me." Sam said, he needed to know what was going on with his partner.

"Not now, Sam." Callen opened the cage with a small sour laugh, "He never even bothered to get a new home."

"What?" Sam asked.

Callen stepped out shaking his head. "No time, take the boys Sam, get them to safety."

Callen unlocked Sam's cuffs and went to the cage containing the boys.

"You will go with Sam. You will do all he says and you will wait for me to get there."

"Yes sir." All three boys said.

The youngest, S, looked at Callen, "Why?" he asked.

Callen smiled and ruffled his hair, "You'll be fine."

The boys waited as Sam stood up, "Come on then G."

Callen shook his head, "There's a honda down the road. Take that get to somewhere with a camera, Eric will find you."

"Where are we?" Sam asked again.

"Bakersfield. Now, go… this way." Callen walked to a shelving unit and pulled it aside revealing a hidden door.

"How did you know about this?" Sam asked.

"I already told you, been here before."

Callen opened the door, "Now go, stay close to the wall and don't let him see you."

"G I need his name…" Sam pushed, "And I'm not going without it."

"His name is Nick McPherson. Now please Sam, Go!"

Sam held G's hand for a moment, not wanting to let go. "I will be back for you." He vowed.

"Go…" Callen wrenched his hand away and pushed Sam out the door, closing it and pushing the shelves back into position before climbing back into his cage and relocking it.

* * *

He waited, knowing exactly what was going on to the poor boy upstairs, he felt sick as he realized that as a child he had been played. He wondered how many children he had sent to their doom at the hands of this monster? How many more had go on to do the same thing in his name? How many was he responsible for? The thought made him sick and he vomited in the bucket in the corner of the cage.

After what seemed to be an hour he heard movement upstairs.

The door opened and a light shined up in the darkness illuminating the silhouette of Nick and M who was unconscious in his arms.

"Well, it's nice and quiet down here." Nick said as he walked down the steps, "Move away from the cage brats." he called out.

He stopped as there was no movement.

"It's just us." Callen said, "They are gone, safe and away from you."

Nick dropped M on the floor, the boy gave a groan and curled into a ball.

He dragged him into the cage and slammed the door shut with a clang. Walking over to Callen's cage he kicked the door open and grabbed him by the the throat and smacked his head into the bars, getting madder by the second as Callen laughed.

"You know I'm your master boy." Nick snarled, "You haven't saved those kids you know, you've just let them loose, soon they'll be placed in group homes and they'll just send me new boys."

"You son of a bitch!" Callen hit him in the face and Nick stumbled backwards.

Nick put his hand in his pocket and hit Callen with a small hand held cattleprod.

Callen curled into a ball as the electrical impulses overwhelmed him and that coupled with the injuries to his head became too much and he passed out.

* * *

Sam took the boys down the road and found the old Honda, piling the boys into the car they drove down the road until they were pulled over by a sheriff patrol car.

"Hands on the wheel!" The officer called.

He walked to the car as Sam did as he was instructed. The officer looked at the large black man and the small blond boys in the back.

"I'm a federal Agent, these boys are victims in a kidnapping, I need you to call NCIS and ask for Hetty Lange, My ID is in my pocket, I'm going to get it."

The officer nodded, his hand on his gun, "Fingertips only." he ordered.

Sam complied and handed the officer his credentials.

"Ok, Do you want to come to my car while I make the call?" The officer asked.

Sam nodded, "Stay here boys, I'll be in the car behind." Sam said.

J nodded and held the hands of the other boys as Sam left.

The officer looked at the state of Sam's pants, "What happened?" he asked.

Sam filled him in, the officer turning pale as he was informed what had been going on in his county.

"I got some sweatpants in the trunk. They're clean and may be a bit tight, but if ya want them?"

Sam smiled, "Thank you, It's been hard making sure the boys don't see nothin'. You got a first aid kit?"

The officer took the kit out of his car, as he did so he caught sight of one of the higher burns Sam carried.

"They go further down?" The officer asked wincing.

Sam nodded, "The guys a sick son of a bitch. But we have to be careful, there's still a kid and my partner in there. I need to call my boss, Hetty. Fill her in and get back up, I'm not sure how long I've been there, but I think it's been a few days, the boys seem to have been there much longer." The officer nodded and handed Sam his cell phone as Sam sat carefully in the front seat of the car.

* * *

Hetty sat at her desk worried sick, there had been no sign of Callen or Sam for three days. All of her efforts to trace them had come up blank.

Even Callen's chip, which she had been sure he hadn't known about, led her to a rescue dog living with a small boy and his family in Pasadena.

She was worried about the two men, and it showed.

Kensi and Deeks were sitting in the bullpen, helping Eric and Nell go over every camera in Los Angeles, still apart from one sighting of Callen going into a thrift store there had been nothing.

Hetty looked at her cup of tea, it tasted stale to her as her gut clenched. She knew something bad was happening and more than anything she hated the inability she had to control the situation.

She nearly jumped as her phone rang, picking it up she hoped it was Eric.

"Hetty Lange." she said as she noticed it was an outside call.

"Hetty, it's Sam."

"Mr. Hanna!" Hetty smiled, "Are you alright? Is Mr. Callen with you?"

"Hetty…." Sam's voice choked up, "I'm in Bakersfield, need Eric to run information on a Nick McPherson, Callen's still there, I need backup and children's services, I have three boys in the car, one still in the house with G. Need an ambulance. What he did to these kids...G… God!"

"Wait there Mr. Hanna, we are on our way." Hetty told him.

"We?" Sam asked.

"Your team, Mr. Granger and I." Hetty said as she hung up the phone.

In the car Sam looked at the officer and sighed, "Oh Bugger."

* * *

Callen groaned as he came too, his head was killing him.

He looked down and realized he was chained, spread eagled to the bed. Nick sat on a chair looking him up and down.

"You got older boy." He said.

"You got fat." Callen retorted.

"I'm still more than a man than you are slave."

"Bite me." Callen snapped angrily.

"Later." Nick leered.

Callen looked away disgust brewing in his belly.

"Why that look G. You know only Bill and I really love you, that only we really know the real you."

"Sam…"

Nick laughed, "Sam loves you? He doesn't know you. Does he?"

Callen turned his head away.

"Does he know how you would beg for me to take you, how well your body responded to me, do you think it would have done that if you didn't want it?"

Callen shook as silent tears rolled down his face. It was true, his body had responded to Nick's touch, just as it was doing now as he ran his hands over the younger man.

"No!" Callen moved away from his touch.

"I can always go back down and see if M has anything left in him." Nick threatened and smiled as Callen lay back and closed his eyes.

"Just do it." he breathed.

"No….no that won't do it." Nick stopped, stood up and started walking towards the door.

"Please…." He whispered.

"What was that?" Nick said stopping and turning back to Callen.

"Please Sir, T….take me…" He let out a half strangled sob, he couldn't let M be hurt anymore. He didn't want anyone else to be hurt on his account. M had a chance, if he got help, of a good and productive life. He knew that Sam would come and get the boy, but knowing what he knew now about himself, he doubted he would come back for him.

He was filthy and he knew it. As Nick touched him he reverted back to the training that he remembered, Nick's words only reinforcing what was in his head.

He was used, useless, worthless, no one would ever love him as Nick and Bill did, no one ever had and no one ever would.

He thought of the words, the feelings he had for Sam. Sam had told him he was worth something, that he was loved. But that was before all this.

Would Sam really love him, now he knew?

He let out another sob, as Nick turned him over.

"I've missed you boy, and I can see you have missed me. Now your worthless ass is mine."

* * *

Hetty pulled up in a car with Owen to join the small group outside the house.

"What is the state of play, Mr. Hanna."

"Callen, one boy and Nick Mcpherson are still inside. Bakersfield PD were called in, they have a thermal imaging camera, there are two people on the ground floor and one person in the concealed basement. I don't know who is who."

Hetty nodded, "And you?"

"I'm fine Hetty," She looked at him askew as he moved uncomfortably.

"Ok, so not entirely fine, I have been injured. But I can't leave him in there Hetty. He needs me."

"I believe you may be right." She looked at the boys huddled in the back of the stolen Honda. They hadn't stepped foot out of the car, unused to open spaces and Sam hadn't told them they could move.

"Who are those boys?" Hetty asked.

"They were in the basement of McPherson's house, apart from the youngest who remembers his name is Sam. But the others are just initials."

"Like Callen?" Owen asked.

Sam nodded.

"Yeah...I'm wondering if they started this because his name was G, or if they knew his name and took it away from him."

"I have no idea Mr. Hanna, the only person who can answer that is Mr. Callen himself. Are we ready to breach yet and get him out of there?"

Sam shook his head, "I saw a lot of guns upstairs, I told the officer, he's called in SWAT. They are on their way."

"I don't want Mr. Callen, or that boy…"

"M." Sam supplied.

"I don't want either of them with that monster any longer than they have to be."

"I totally agree Hetty, but you also need to know. Boys have been sent here for years, other boys that have been…'trained' by McPherson have been going back to group homes and grooming children of a specific type to be sent to them.

Hetty looked at the boy, all blond haired and blue eyed and shuddered.

"That is awful, who on earth would have come up with a plan like that? Mr. Wilson, or Mr. McPherson?"

Sam shook his head and said nothing. The one thing he couldn't tell her was, right now, he thought it was G's plan.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

G lay face down on the bed, his mind blanking out what Nick was doing to him.

Instead it was turning down a self destructive path of self doubt. He knew that M would be able to be saved by Sam. That was a good thing, but yet again he had proved he was not good enough to be truly loved and cared for by lying with Nick. His body's responses betraying the pain that was ripping his heart out.

He had thought this was love when he had done this as a child, he had thought this was love when he had done this with Pete. It was obvious now, he had been wrong, so it can't have been love with Sam.

Sam was his partner, he had trusted him. But Sam had used him the same as the others. He had used him because that's all Callen was good for, being used.

He had been used by men, used by women, used by the system, used by agencies.

He sobbed as he realized he was nothing more than a piece of meat to be used, a thing not a person.

Nick smiled as he felt Callen sob under him, the breaking of the man helping him to completion.

He got up and cleaned himself up.

"G!" He ordered.

Callen looked at him with dead eyes.

"Clean yourself up, Shower and clean up the bed. Wait for me and don't move from this room. If you leave I will hurt not only the boy, but that little woman who took you away from me."

"Hetty?" Callen's voice broke at the word.

"Hetty, she's not as invulnerable as you might think." He took his phone and showed him pictures of Hetty through a scope.

"We can take her out, I have people watching her. You leave the house, she dies. You attack me, She dies. You allow anyone else to hurt me, she dies, it's _all_ on _you_ boy. Now, do as you were ordered."

"Yes Sir." Callen replied his shoulders slumping, going to do as he was ordered.

Hetty had been the only one, never to use him in the way others had. She was, he thought, what having a mother must be like. He couldn't allow her to be hurt. Not for him.

Nick walked out of the room and went to check on M, the boy wouldn't know his touch again, not until he begged from the lack of it.

After all he had his original prize back. Older, but still pliable.

He didn't care where the others had gone.

He doubted they would come back. Sam had heard what the boys had told him. G was worthless, Sam wouldn't risk his life for him, not now he knew what he had done as a child.

Well, Nick wouldn't and didn't care if G died to save his life.

He looked down at the shivering form of the younger boy, he had gone a bit overboard on the child earlier in his excitement of having G back under his control again.

He felt a sliver of guilt and threw a blanket over the boy. Then he turned and walked out.

* * *

"What the hell is taking so long?" Granger asked the patrol officer who had initially taken charge of the scene.

"There is a child in there, we are not planning on going in all guns blazing, this is Bakerfield, not Los Angeles."

"I should hope not, I have a captured federal agent in there as well." He snapped.

Sam was sitting on the edge of the ambulance, a paramedic injecting him with penicillin to counteract the infection raging through him right now.

"I don't think Sam should go in." Granger said quietly to Hetty, "He's been injured, you can see how much pain he's in."

"I agree, however, Mr. Hanna may not be as accommodating."

Sam looked over, past Kensi and Deeks who were putting on their vests and checking their rifles to the diminutive Operations Manager and the Assistant Director who were looking at him and shaking their head sadly.

"Aww, Hell No!" Sam cursed and painfully got up moving the paramedic out of the way. He looked over at the larger man and decided to deal with another one of the boys instead.

The boys were sat together on a gurney in the ambulance, not moving or talking, while the paramedics tried and failed to get information out of them.

They had said a bit after a nod from Sam, but now he had left, they clammed up and held each other tightly for comfort.

"No!" Sam said as he barged past Kensi and Deeks. "There is no way I'm staying here while G needs me Hetty, I'm his partner."

"Mr. Callen will be in good hands, your teammates are more than capable; along with the Special Weapons and Tactics team. Those boys there need you." Hetty pointed to the frazzled paramedics trying to get vitals off the boys. "They were only co-operating because you were in the ambulance with them."

"They were only doing that because G ordered them too." Sam snapped. "They see him as one of them." Sam said meaning Nick.

"Maybe he is," Hetty replied, meaning a survivor, just like the boys.

"The hell he is!" Sam stood menacingly over the smaller woman.

"Sam, back off." Granger ordered.

"She thinks G is like...Like that man?!" Sam shook his head, "How could you Hetty?"

"Oh, no Mr. Hanna. I meant he is a victim, like those poor boys. He is going to need our help and understanding."

Sam bent down and kissed Hetty's forehead, "I'm sorry, you're right I am just looking out for my brat." He whispered in her ear.

Hetty patted his arm, "So are we Mr. Hanna."

Deeks and Kensi walked up to the group. "We're ready to breach, SWAT will be taking the basement, We will be taking the upper floors."

"Good," Hetty said.

Sam turned to her, "Please, Hetty I need to go."

She sighed, "I know. Allow Mr. Deeks and Ms Blye go with the first wave, You, Owen and myself will be bringing up the rear."

"You?" Both Owen and Sam blurted out surprised.

"Of course, Mr. Callen needs me, where else would I be?"

* * *

Nick walked back up the stairs, his attention was taken by what he thought was some movement in the bushes outside.

He walked into the bedroom, smiling at the fact that Callen was curled in the corner and everything had been done as he had ordered.

He frowned as he noticed Callen was wearing sweatpants.

"What are you doing in those?" He snapped.

Callen's eyes dropped in submission, "I'm sorry, Sir."

Nick threw a pair of thin cotton shorts at him. "Put these on."

Callen pulled off his sweatpants and pulled the shorts down.

"You disobeyed boy." He walked over to the closet. Opening the door he pulled out a whip. "Face down on the bed, one noise from you and the boy will get two for every one you mess up on."

Callen nodded in total silence he lay face down, wincing but not making a noise as he was beaten by McPherson.

Nick stopped as a large bang came from outside the house.

"Protect me." He ordered, "If you talk to them and I don't contact my friend, that little woman will die, do you understand. _NOT A SINGLE WORD_!"

Callen nodded, he took the gun and stood between Nick and the door, praying that the first person through the door would not be Sam.

Deeks and Kensi took point with the SWAT team, entering the house, via the door Sam had showed them on the plans. Both holding back the nausea at the smell of blood and bodily fluids in the basement.

"Take the boy." Kensi said pointing to the child in the cage.

"No!" M shook his head, "I can't leave."

"It's Ok, you can come, your friends and Sam are outside. It's ok." Deeks said, "He won't hurt you anymore."

M looked up, Marty's heart clenched, if he didn't know better he would have sworn that he had seen that look before, on his own face after he had been forced to shoot his father. "Come on kid, it'll be ok, I promise."

M, held out his hand carefully and Deeks swept him up into his arms, "Come on, I'll take you."

"Deeks?" Kensi hissed.

"Take point Kens; I'll take him to Sam and I'll be right back."

Hetty watched as Deeks came out carrying a child.

"Mr. Deeks?"

"We found him inside, the only child there. He needs medical attention."

The boy's hand clung to Deeks' vest.

Granger nodded, "Over there, I'll take point with Kensi, catch us up when you can."

Owen put a vest on and went to join Kensi in the house.

* * *

The team cleared the house, room by room until they came to a room at the end of the hallway.

Granger caught up to them as they opened the door and stopped. Coming face to face with Callen shakily holding a gun and standing protecting McPherson.

"Stand down Callen." Granger ordered, "It's ok."

Callen shot a look at Nick who shook his head and smiled knowingly at Callen.

"Nick McPherson, you are under arrest for child abuse and child trafficking." Granger said as the other officers moved a bit closer.

"Boy!"

Callen moved, He wanted to tell them to stop, if they hurt him Hetty would be hurt, if he talked Hetty would be hurt. He couldn't protect her from whoever it was Nick had watching her.

"Callen?" Kensi was confused, this wasn't the team leader she had known less than a week ago.

Callen opened his mouth, but a look from Nick and the still bleeding welts on his back still burned as a painful reminder of what would happen if he spoke, so he didn't.

A cop took a step forward, "Come on Son, give me the gun." The seasoned officer said.

Callen's hand shook and the officer took the gun from him.

"NO!" Nick growled.

Callen knew he couldn't shoot them, they were, friends? But as the officers moved to arrest Nick he launched at them fighting tooth and nail as Nick went back into the bathroom and climbed out of the window.

"Going somewhere?" Deeks asked as he pointed the gun and the furious looking man, who slowly raised his hands.

As he walked Nick around to the van to have him taken away the police dragged a cuffed and struggling Callen out of the house.

As he caught sight of Nick, he struggled, trying to get to him.

"They know what you did boy, you're done, she's dead." He growled as he walked past.

Callen dropped to his knees. He was done all fight gone he didn't even look up as the sound of someone running towards him filled his ears. He just tensed up awaiting the blows he was sure were about to come.

* * *

Instead he was surrounded in a warm blanket, and two familiar strong arms.

"Come with me G," Sam said softly as he helped his partner up.

Sam scowled at the handcuffs on his partner's wrists, not noticing Callen take a surreptitious look up at him and instantly dropping his eyes at the look of anger on Sam's face.

"You need to see a paramedic." Sam guided him in the direction of the ambulance, concern on his face as Callen refused to look at him or anyone else at the scene.

Hetty grabbed Owen involuntarily, at the state her agent was in.

"Go to him Hetty, I don't know what happened in there but I think he may need you." Owen advised.

Hetty nodded, leaving Owen to deal with Kensi, Deeks and the Bakersfield teams.

Callen walked up the steps of the second ambulance, listening to the sounds of the children in the other ambulance, laughing as Deeks entertained them. For some reason, although it was probably due to M's influence, Deeks had been accepted by the boys as a trusted adult. He didn't look up to see the worried look that Deeks shot Sam and Kensi as Callen walked dejectedly past them.

The paramedic looked up as they entered.

"I'll need privacy to treat him." He said.

Sam nodded, "I'll be outside. Let the man help you G." He said as he sat Callen on the gurney in the ambulance. Then he walked out and shut the door.

The paramedic gave him a shot and then he spoke.

"You failed in your duty to your master." The paramedic said darkly.

Callen's head shot up and he was slapped around the face.

"You think Nick was lying when he said he had friends in this town? That was an overdose of a sedative, soon you will be dead, and so will that little woman we have been watching."

Callen lurched to his feet and slammed bodily into the paramedic, launching him into the wall.

Outside, as Hetty arrived, Sam became concerned as the ambulance lurched.

Hetty opened the door expecting to find an arguing Callen trying to leave. "What she got was a man who had pulled a gun from his back waistband and aimed it at her."

"NO!" Callen screamed and launched himself between the bullet and the gun as it went off.

Hetty staggered back down the steps to be swiftly caught by Sam as another gunshot fired by Kensi dispatched the paramedic.

"G?" Sam set Hetty on her feet and went to Callen's side as he lay bleeding on the floor of the ambulance.

G's eyes fluttered open as the sedative took effect, "I'm sorry." He whispered as they closed again.

The last thing he heard was Sam's anguished cry.

" _ **G!"**_


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11.

Slowly he became aware of his surroundings, a beeping, a feeling of safety and warmth, the smell of home.

He relaxed, not wanting to wake up.

He moved as his pillow chuckled.

"You awake brat?" Sam's low voice broke through his drug induced haze.

"Ummm" Callen sighed, feeling content.

Sam chuckled again, "He's going to be fine." he said to someone else in the room.

Callen tensed as he realized he wasn't alone with Sam.

Sam ran his hand through the hair on Callen's head, it was slightly longer than normal and he loved the feel of it.

"Shh Brat, you're safe."

Callen opened his eyes and immediately locked onto Sam's deep brown eyes.

"Where am I?" he asked, his brain felt fuzzy and muddled.

"In hospital, you'll be ok. The drugs are being phased out of your system and the bullet didn't do any damage."

"Bullet? I was shot?" Callen pulled back to look down, wincing as a pain tore through his shoulder.

"Rest Callen, you'll injure yourself again." Kensi said as she sat up in the chair she was occupying near the door.

Callen's eyes widened in horror as he realized the compromising situation himself and Sam were in.

Sam smiled and dropped a kiss on Callen's forehead.

"It's ok." He said, "We are just all glad we have you back."

"I went somewhere?" Callen asked.

Sam laughed, but then stopped when he realized Callen was serious.

"G?"

"What?" Callen winced as he stretched trying to get comfy, Sam moved off the bed laying him gently down.

"Kensi, go find the doctor." Sam said quietly to her. She nodded, her face a look of concern and left the room.

"What's wrong?" Callen asked. He was concerned, for someone who had been shot in the shoulder, he was hurt in all the wrong places. Places he hadn't hurt in for a long, long time. "Sam... What happened?"

Callen shifted in the bed, putting his back against the wall.

"What is the last thing you remember?"

Callen tried to think. "Some guy died, Geoff Wilson? Was there an accident on the way?"

Sam leaned over, kissing Callen on the cheek, "Rest, the doctor will be here soon, he'll check you over."

"Sam?" G growled, not liking the feeling in his gut.

"Rest babe." Sam walked to the door, "I'll be back in a second."

Callen looked down, apart from the bullet wound, there was nothing on his front to explain the pain he felt all over his body, as he moved one of the dressings on his back snagged and he winced in pain. He was sure he had worn a safety belt on the way there, and if there were glass cuts wouldn't they be on his face rather than his back?

He jumped as the phone beside his bed rang, picking it up and answering it, he paled and dropped the phone shaking in shock.

* * *

Sam stood outside, grim faced as Hetty walked back to Callen's room.

"Mr. Hanna, What's wrong?" Hetty asked.

"G doesn't remember. None of it, nothing past getting the call from Eric about Wilson."

"Maybe that is a blessing." Hetty said, "I have talked to Owen and Ms. Blye about how Mr. Callen was found. I knew last time this happened…" She stopped, realizing what she had let slip.

"You knew him back then?" Sam asked, stepping towards her menacingly.

Hetty nodded, "I wanted to take him in back then, he was so traumatized and refused to go to my home or anyone else's home. He insisted on staying in the group homes."

"He was being controlled, Bill was the instigator, but Nick... Nick was the sadist that controlled him, I know that now." Sam started to pace, "Did he ever talk to you back then about what had happened to him?"

Hetty patted a chair and Sam took a seat away from the main corridor.

"He wouldn't talk, not to adults for nearly six months. He would talk to kids, the ones who found somewhere to go, we knew he would befriend kids for a while, then he would make a call and those kids would be fostered within a week. All boys and all blond."

Sam shook his head. "No... I... No! Callen wouldn't give kids to that monster."

"I'm not sure he was, not willingly anyway. We managed to get him to go to therapy. He wouldn't say anything, except once. He was being talked to by the therapist, who asked him if he missed his parents and his parents love. Mr. Callen, according to the therapist shook his head and said he didn't remember his parents. But that 'they', we assumed it was child services, made him leave the only people who ever loved him. I thought he meant Bill and Sheila McPherson, but I am wondering, what if Mr. Callen actually meant Bill and Nick? What if Mr. Callen was desperately trying to get back to the love he craved."

Sam ran a hand over his face. "God!"

"So you see, even if he did steer those boys in the direction of Bill and Nick McPherson, he was in his mind trying to get them somewhere where they would be loved."

* * *

Callen leaned over the bowl and vomited.

He couldn't believe what he had just heard, Nick McPherson. A voice he hadn't heard in years called him. He described in detail what he had done to Callen and what Callen had done to the boys that had been in the house with him.

Callen shook his head, Nick had to be lying. There was no way that he had voluntarily done that to a child.

Maybe that was why Kensi was there? He thought. Maybe he was under arrest? But if he was, why would Sam have been holding him?

Callen was conflicted, how on earth had Nick McPherson found him? What had happened and how much time was he actually missing?

Callen swung his legs over the edge of the bed, he needed to find out where he was and what had happened.

He pulled out the IV that was pumping into his arm, tying it off so he didn't make a mess. He looked out of his room and saw Sam and Hetty talking down the corridor.

He caught Hetty's words floating down the corridor.

"He wouldn't talk, not to adults for nearly six months. He would talk to kids, the ones who found somewhere to go, we knew he would befriend kids for a while, then he would make a call and those kids would be fostered within a week. All boys and all blond."

Sam's face darkened in anger, he couldn't face anymore and he turned to limp away from the two people he thought he could trust.

"Where are you going?" Owen asked as the elevator doors opened and Granger found himself face to face with Callen.

Callen mumbled and staggered a bit, leaning on the frame of the elevator.

"Come on G." Granger said, "You need to rest, you've been through a lot."

Callen shook his head, "Not going back there." He stated stubbornly.

Owen looked at him kindly, "Why not?" he asked.

"They… know, they blame me… I didn't know honest. I thought…" Callen looked down and a tear rolled down his face.

"Trust them Callen." Granger said.

"Why? You didn't hear Hetty. She told Sam… How did she even know?"

Granger put his arm around Callen, "I've talked to your doctor with all that happened to you, you shouldn't be walking around, never mind alone."

"I can't go back to them, I know now, I know what Sam did." Granger looked over and saw a small lounge which was empty. He steered Callen in that direction and sat him down in a soft high back chair.

"Tell me what's wrong?" Owen asked.

Callen leaned forwards his shoulders slumped, "I thought I could trust Sam. I thought I had finally found a place where I belonged. I was wrong. He's just the same as the others."

"I talked to your doctor Callen, I know what happened to you. Sam and Hetty don't know yet, not about…"

Callen shook his head, "Doesn't matter, wasn't the first, won't be the last."

"What do you need?" Granger asked.

"Shooting?" Callen quipped. "Arresting maybe, all those kids… I didn't know."

"I know." Granger said. "What do _you_ need."

"I need space, somewhere… safe. Somewhere away from them."

"You'll need to face them sooner or later, they don't judge you, you know."

"I judge me, I need to work through this, I can't do it with them. I need to know where I stand?"

Owen stood up and patted Callen gently on the shoulder.

"Wait there."

Owen looked at the two down the hall, talking quietly. He knew this wouldn't be a popular move, but then again, he'd never been popular. But he had been watching over Callen about as long as Hetty had.

* * *

A few moments later he walked back into the room where Callen hadn't moved.

"Come on son," He went to take Callen's arm, but he flinched.

"I'm not going back."

"No, I'm having you moved to a different room, private wing. Under an alias, until you are ready."

Callen looked at him suspiciously. "Why are you helping me?" he asked.

Granger looked hurt for a second. "Because you are a valuable member of this team and the team works better when you all get what you need."

Callen wondered about it. Granger had never hurt him, but he had many a time angered him or pushed his buttons. They always seemed to clash, but now he was helping him.

A porter turned up, "Cal Granger, are you ready to go?" he asked.

Callen looked at Granger incredulous, "Cal Granger?" he asked.

Granger shrugged, "I only had a minute son." he said by way of argument.

Callen nodded and let Granger help him into the wheelchair.

"I'll sort out the others, you go and get settled I'll be by to see you later. Just know, you are not to blame and no one is blaming you. Take the time to rest and heal. We will work through this."

Callen put his hand on Granger's arm, "Why you? Why are you helping me."

"Because you need me son."

Callen sat back in the chair as the porter pushed him away from Sam and Hetty to his new room.

Sam stormed out of Callen's room as he found it empty, he turned to see Granger walking up the hallway.

"G's missing." Sam growled.

"No, he's not." Granger said, looking at the two of them both so different in stature but both determined to find Callen.

"He's not in his room and his IV has been knotted off, he's running!"

"Mr Callen is safe, he's got nursing care and is resting comfortably."

"Where?"

"It doesn't matter where." Owen stood his ground, "This is what he needs to heal, he's going to see a therapist, a good one. He's going to recover from his wounds and when, only when he is ready, then he will see you."

"He needs me!" Sam argued.

"Right now he needs to work through what happened to him. Alone and in his own time."

"And you think you are the right person to help him Owen?" Hetty asked. "When did you start to care about our Mr. Callen?"

Granger turned to go, but not before Hetty heard his parting comment.

"A long time ago."

* * *

Callen sobbed as he was left alone in his room.

He needed to sort out his feelings for Sam. He needed to process and all of his usual coping mechanisms were not working. He blamed it on the painkillers that were still in his system. He curled himself into a ball, his back to the door. He knew that Granger wouldn't tell them where he was. After all Granger wouldn't miss a chance to annoy Hetty or Sam.

But why he would help him was still confusing him.

He was glad he had moved rooms, the last thing he wanted was Nick finding him again.

The door opened and Callen froze, trying to get his emotions inside.

"It's me." Granger said.

Callen slowly and painfully turned to look at him. "How did they take it?"

"Sam's ready to rip the hospital apart to find you." Granger smirked, but stopped at the fear on Callen's face.

"Not like that, he's worried about you, he cares a lot."

Callen scoffed, "Sure he does, he's just…"

"I know about you and Sam, it's the worst kept secret at NCIS."

Callen paled, "How?"

"I caught you a month ago, you looked… contented, I hadn't seen you that relaxed in years… months." He amended.

"You gonna transfer me or fire me?" Callen countered.

"Neither." Granger said, earning him a surprised look from the younger man. "Sam loves you. You love him."

"No he doesn't." Callen snapped. "He's just like the rest, how can I tell? I'm so messed up I don't even know what love is?"

"Love is caring about someone so much that you will put their needs before your own. Like Sam is now. He hates it, but knowing you needed this he acquiesced. He's going to help Kensi and Deeks, but said you are to call him as soon as you are ready."

"It doesn't matter if you love a man or a woman, as long as the person you love truly loves you back."

"Sam has Michelle." Callen snapped.

"Yes, he does, and luckily for you she understands too. Sam will never leave Michelle, but he will never leave you either."

"So… he's not like Nick?"

"God, no!" Granger replied astonished.

Callen lay back with a small smile on his face as he suddenly felt tired.

"He loves me." He sighed as he finally fell asleep.

Granger looked on with a sigh, "A lot of people do son." he said quietly, got up and left Callen to rest.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Sam sat in the small cubicle in the ER, he wasn't sure what hurt the most, his injury or his heart.

What had started out as him giving comfort to a teammate and providing what he needed had, over the years, escalated into love. He still loved Michelle as fiercely as ever, but there was something about Callen. Something about the man that screamed he needed to be loved and nurtured, and his heart had expanded to include his partner.

Hell, his whole family had taken G into their hearts and the thought that Callen wanted space away from them now was killing him.

He lay back as the doctor looked at his wounds.

"You're lucky Agent Hanna, the person who did this was obviously a well practiced sadist. He has avoided and permanent damage and scarring will be minimal, however, I would suggest you and any sexual partner, you have, refrain from any sexual activity for at least six weeks while the burns heal. I will prescribe a topical ointment to help with the healing. Also, I see you are... Well, rather muscular, do you work out a lot?" The doctor asked.

Sam nodded, "I run about ten miles a day, lift weights, swim, spar."

"Well, apart from weight lifting, and only from a bench press I would suggest you refrain from anything that might irritate the scrotum for the same length of time."

He handed him a script for antibiotics. "Take these, finish the course and then make an appointment with your personal physician for a check up after the course is finished." He advised.

Sam nodded, "Thanks Doc." He pulled on his pants and went to find Kensi and Deeks.

Kensi was pacing outside a room as Deeks and Hetty talked to a woman inside.

"You alright?" Sam asked as he saw her bite her lip.

Kensi nodded, "I hope so."

Sam looked worried, "Is Deeks injured? What's going on?" he asked.

"They've found where all the boys, but one came from, they have all been checked by a pediatrician and are being sent to new homes after therapy. But one boy… well, he's not in the system anywhere." Kensi explained.

"Poor kid, what's going to happen to him?" Sam asked.

"Deeks wants to adopt him." Kensi said.

"Seriously?" Sam asked.

Kensi nodded with a smile, "He's a terrific kid, I'm kinda looking forward to being his mom."

"You too?" Sam smiled, "You guys will be great parents."

Kensi grinned, "You'll never guess what his name is?"

Sam cocked his head waiting, "What?"

"Martin." Kensi smiled.

Deeks stood up and shook the woman's hand.

"Thank you." He said, then he wrapped his arms around Hetty, "Thank you." he added again.

"It was young Martin that tipped the scales, He seemed most taken with Ms. Blye and you, Mr. Deeks. He was most insistent that he would only stay with them."

The social worker nodded, "Also with the background you have provided me. I feel you will both be more suitable for the boy. Remember at this stage, guardianship of the boy is temporary, it will be a long time before it is permanent, but I can see it working out."

Deeks smiled and went to the door and opened it, "Kens, she just got off the phone with the judge, we've got temporary custody of Martin."

She ran to cover the space between them and wrapped her arms around his neck. Kissing him deeply she looked back at Sam, "Now you're not the only parent."

"Ms Blye, Mr Deeks, would you like to go and see your boy."

Deeks' face darkened for a moment, "No, you can't call him that not with what he has been through, but we will go and see _our son._ "

Sam and Hetty followed the couple behind as they went to see Martin.

* * *

He was sitting in a private room reading a comic Deeks had brought him earlier holding a trauma teddy one of the nurses had given him. Deeks had been shocked to find out he was just 6 years old.

Martin smiled as Deeks walked in. "Is it true? Are you going to be my daddy?" he asked quietly worried.

"If you still want me to be." Deeks said, holding Kensi's hand tight.

Martin, still hurting from his injuries climbed onto Deeks' lap and wrapped his hands around his neck, "I'm gonna be safe now." He whispered to the bear he still held.

Deeks looked up, the only one who heard the child's statement, with tears in his eyes.

"I promise you, with all that is in me, both Kensi and I will keep you safe." He vowed.

Sam looked at the interplay between the young detective and the boy. He wasn't sure what it was that had bound the two together so tightly, but he was seeing a side of Deeks he hadn't even known existed. His respect for the man grew.

* * *

Hetty pulled him to one side, leaving the new family together in the side room and walked with him out to the hallway.

"How are you Mr. Hanna? I hope you have now taken time to see a doctor for your injuries?"

Sam nodded, "Yeah, I need six weeks before active duty, but I'll be fine."

"I have called Mr. Getz, he's coming to help Mr. Callen and I hope you will schedule some time with him too."

"I'm fine Hetty." Sam argued.

"I'm sure you are, but for my peace of mind, please talk to him. Maybe it will help with Mr. Callen's situation as well."

Sam nodded, "I will see him, Hetty, if for no other reason than for G."

"I have a suggestion." Hetty said, "Mr. Callen is also taking six weeks of leave to heal. Mr Deeks and Ms Blye are going on adoptive parental leave while young Martin gets settled. I have a quiet retreat in the hills. Maybe you and your family should get away for a while. I will call as soon as Mr. Callen asks for you."

Sam was surprised that Callen was voluntarily taking his sick leave, he had hoped that G would have wanted to get back to work, or at least see him sooner than that. He realized he was deep in thought and hadn't replied to Hetty. "Michelle and Kamran are at her sister's, Aiden is at school. I could use the time, though if the offer is still open?"

Hetty nodded, "I think, if I send Mr. Getz with you first, we can help you before Mr. Callen is ready to ask for help."

"You will call if he needs me, won't you?" Sam asked.

Hetty nodded, "Likewise, if you need someone."

"I'll call." Sam promised, "Just… I don't want to leave him, I know he's pushing people away, I just worry that he'll need me and I'll be with Nate."

"Apparently right now, all Mr. Callen wants is Owen."

Sam shook his head in disbelief, "Keep an eye on him, Hetty. I don't know what Granger's angle is, but I don't trust him."

Hetty sighed, "You are not the only one."

* * *

Callen lay in his bed, still trying to get his head around what had happened.

Owen was standing outside talking to a man.

"Callen?" He called as they walked inside the room.

G didn't look at them.

"G, this is Alex Simons, he's a Deprogrammer."

"What the hell do I need a Deprogrammer for?"

Alex walked in, "Mr. Callen." He said as he entered. "I have read your file."

"I don't need a deprogrammer."

"No?" Alex smiled sadly, "No, I don't suppose you do, so… What are you doing in that bed BOY!" He yelled and without a thought Callen was on his knees, head bowed.

"Asshole!" G cursed as he got back up.

"I am sorry to do that to you." Alex said, "I just wanted you to see."

"I see alright, I'm wrong, I'm broken and I'm useless. A poor excuse for a federal agent, a poor excuse for a man." His voice trailed to a whisper at the end.

"No, not at all, you are a victim of circumstance. This happened to you."

"I let it happen to me." Callen groused looking out of the window not seeing the pain on both men's faces at his statement.

"Mr. Callen?" Alex said.

"G." Callen replied.

Alex looked at Granger, who nodded, confirming his name.

"G, you were a child, you didn't know that this was wrong."

"You don't understand." Callen mumbled, looking out of the window. "It isn't that I'm a victim, I'm not. I asked for it, worse, I sent others to the same fate. I should be arrested."

Granger stepped over and put his hand on Callen's shoulder, "That's not true, you didn't know."

Callen shook him off. "I didn't know not a defense and you know it Granger. I'm wrong. I'm broken, it's no wonder my father never tried to find me, he probably knew and didn't want a defective son. He's lucky he's dead, he never has to face me and see what he unleashed on the world."

Granger stepped back as if hit.

"I'm sure your father did all he could to find you, I'm sure he thought about you every day."

"What the hell do you know, you know nothing about me or my father. You have no idea about how he would or wouldn't feel... Why the hell are you here Granger?"

Owen turned away, "Because I care."

Callen laughed callously, "Why the hell would you care?"

Granger looked at him sadly. He opened his mouth to say something, but Alex coughed. Realizing that he was in the room watching the interaction between the two men, Granger turned on his heels and left.

Callen shook his head in wonder. He didn't know why Granger had done this, he assumed it was because he wanted to keep him as an agent or something.

Callen followed him out into the hall.

"Why? Why do all this for me, you hate me."

"I don't hate you Callen, I could never hate you." Granger walked forward again.

"I need to understand, I can't deal with your messing with my head right now. I don't know what your agenda is, but just… please, no more."

"I'm sorry son." Granger said.

"I'm not your son." Callen spat.

Granger sighed as he turned away again. "Yes, you are."

"What?!" Callen stood stock still in shock. _"NO!"_ He breathed in disbelief, shaking his head and moving away.

"I'm your father, I... I'm sorry."

Callen looked him up and down, he could see the similarities now, but, he shook his head.

"You're lying." He took a step back, "You're working with Bill and Nick aren't you?"

Alex stepped forward. "Callen, I can assure you no one here means you any harm and we are most certainly not working with Bill and Nick."

Tears fell from Callen's eyes as he backed himself into a corner not registering the pain in his back as he slid down the wall to curl in a ball.

"Why?" He asked as he rested his head on his knees, wishing he were anywhere on the planet but here. Wishing more than anything that wherever he could be, he could be there with Sam.

* * *

Sam placed his bag down in the hallway of the cabin Hetty had provided for his recuperation as Nate walked around the corner holding a hot mug of tea.

"Nice isn't it?" He smiled as Sam took in the wooden beams and the frontier style decor Hetty had furnished the cabin with.

Sam smiled, "It is, I wonder if Hetty would let me come back sometime?"

Nate shrugged, "I don't know, you'll have to ask her. Come on, I'll show you where the bedrooms are, I picked mine already, you pick yours and put your bag down. I have food going for later and was hoping I could go over the plan for your therapy."

Sam followed him and admired the rest of the cabin as he walked through.

"She doesn't do things by halves." Sam remarked as he saw a door with an envelope and his name on it.

Reading the letter contained inside he smiled as he opened the door and looked at the room she had picked.

"It's perfect." He remarked.

Nate raised an eyebrow in surprise. The room was a mixture of dark woods and different shades of blue fabrics.

"It's nice." He admitted.

"It's G's room." Sam said, handing Nate the letter. "Apparently the cabin is jointly owned by him and Hetty."

Nate looked around, he could see influences of Callen in the whole cabin, small touches here and there. Sam ran his hand over the edge of the bed as he turned to leave the room.

"You miss him don't you?" Nate asked.

Sam narrowed his eyes, wondering just how much Nate actually knew.

"I'm Callen's therapist too, there isn't anything I don't know about you two." Nate clarified.

Sam walked into the kitchen and poured himself a mug of coffee, taking a seat on the stool by the counter he turned to Nate.

"I miss him." He admitted. "I'm afraid that he'll blame himself too much and won't..."

Sam trailed off taking a big sip from his mug, his heart clenching.

"I started this because he needed me, but dammit Nate, I need him."


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

Sam put his mug down and walked to the window, hardly seeing the beautiful scenery outside.

Nate walked behind him and placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Does Michelle know?" He asked quietly.

Sam shook his head, "No… I mean she knows about G and what I do for him. She knows he needs it and I've done it before, but it's never been like this. I still love Michelle and the kids with everything in me. But…" Sam sighed, "I love G, there's something about him, he just… He fills a hole inside me. A missing piece. Do you understand?"

Sam turned to Nate, who nodded in understanding.

He walked to the large fireplace which he had lit an hour ago when he had arrived. Taking a poker he stoked the flames as Sam sat down.

"Have you always been Bisexual Sam?" Nate asked.

Sam shook his head, "Never thought about it. In BUD/S we are trained to be there one hundred percent, for our team. This came about over the years as a natural extension of that. Sometimes we would get someone who needed more than a teammate. Michelle understood, it wasn't love. It was never love."

"Callen changed that?"

"I… I don't know." Sam shook his head and stared at the flickering flames, in the hopes they contained the answers to his questions.

"Do you love Callen?" Nate asked as he sat opposite in a high wing backed chair.

Sam stared at the flames thinking, a small smile played on his lips as he thought about Callen. Evenings they had spent, just wrapped in each other's arms. Times when he had made G lose all sense of self and watched as he had lain contented after an intense bout of lovemaking, knowing he had made his lover feel that way.

He knew now, it wasn't just about giving G what he needed, it had been love.

"I do." He simply said.

"Have you told him?"

Sam shrugged, "I have told him, I'm just not sure he believed it."

Nate smiled in understanding. "Work with me Sam, until I work with Callen, let me know how this works. Hopefully I can work with him and get you both where you need to be."

"I can't leave Michelle, I can't do it to her and the kids." Sam said.

"Do you love Michelle?"

Sam nodded, "I do… God, Nate… I've made such a mess of this!"

"Michelle is ok with you and Callen though, isn't she?"

"She is, she knows G needs this, he needs to feel safe and be touched gently. But she doesn't know that… Dammit Nate, Michelle doesn't know that I _love_ him." Sam started pacing until his injury made it too painful for him to walk and he sat back in the chair.

"Michelle doesn't deserve this, she's been nothing but supportive of the time I spend with G. I don't know if she would be ok with me loving her and G, but I can't live without either of them."

* * *

Nate looked up as a dark jeep drove up the driveway, he hadn't expected Callen so soon, but decided he should carry on with Sam until Callen got to the house.

Sam was still staring into the fire, his mind in a turmoil, he hoped that Michelle would accept how he felt, he wasn't sure if he could live without her.

Nate looked up again, he didn't recognize the man walking towards the house, he had known that Owen Granger was employing a deprogrammer to help with Callen. He wondered if this was that man.

Leaving Sam to his thoughts, he walked to the door, "Alex Simons?"

The man pulled out a gun and shook his head, " _ **No**_...I know you are _not_ Callen, but, I think he will come for you, No?"

Nate stepped back raising his hands. He knew that Sam had not got a gun, and neither had he.

"There is no one here called Callen." Nate replied, "You have the wrong place.

The man laughed, he stepped forward cause Nate to step back and letting him enter.

"We know that Callen is not here now, we cannot get to him where he is now. He will come here for you, and the other."

"Other?"

"Sam Hanna, I was told all about him." The man said his Russian accent pronounced.

"Who are you?" Nate asked, his raised voice pulling Sam out of his musing and causing him to look towards the door.

Four other men moved from the shadow, "We are 'friends' of Nikita Reznikov, we have been looking for him for a long time. However, right now both Reznikov and his son are too well guarded for us to get too, so we will draw out the son and get to the father."

"Now, move inside where we can see you both."

Nate looked over at Sam for instructions, he shook his head, he knew they were outnumbered and he needed to know more about these men and what threat they posed to Callen.

"I hear you have been through some bad times recently and are here to recover." The man who looked like he was in charge said. "We are not animals, we know you need medication Agent Hanna, we will make sure you get what you need."

"He needs therapy with me and I will not, as his doctor allow you to be present during those sessions, you say you are not animals. Prove it. Leave and allow Agent Hanna to heal from his injuries." Nate said, using his height to make him seem more intimidating.

"Nate Getz, yes." The man said, "We know about you. Agent Callen is a friend, no?"

"I work with him, yes."

The man smiled, "Good, he will come for you both, the father will come for him."

"Callen doesn't know where his father is." Sam growled worried about what these men would do to G if he turned up there.

The man laughed, "Agent Hanna, you are a bad liar. Agent Callen knows who his father is, we saw them together in the hospital not less than a few hours ago. Now rest. I believe it will soon be time for your medication."

Sam sat, he knew he couldn't do anything to stop these men, not now. They were armed and he wasn't and he did need his medication. For the life of him, he couldn't figure out why, if Callen had met his father, he hadn't come and told him.

Maybe Callen did blame him for what had happened.

Maybe he had, by leaving with the boys, betrayed him in some way.

"Callen isn't due up here for at least six weeks." Sam snapped, glaring at the men defiantly only looking away as Nate brought his pills, a glass of water and a sandwich.

"Eat first, you can't take the pills without food." Nate instructed.

"Thanks." Sam took a bite, even though his appetite had fled.

"You have a phone?" The man asked.

"We have a phone for emergencies." Nate admitted.

The man nodded.

"I will take it, I think." He turned to a man standing in the corner watching them.

"Alyosha, take the picture, then send it to Callen, get him here. Then Reznikov will pay."

"Who are you?" Sam demanded again, frustration getting the better of him.

"My name is Konstantin Chernov. Nikita used my name and identity to leave the country and ruined me."

Chernov sat back in the chair Nate had been sitting in earlier.

"Now Mr. Getz, If Agent Hanna wants you to live he will give me Callen's cell phone number."

Nate gulped as a gun was placed to his temple.

Sam watched for a moment, but crumbled, "Fine… fine, here." He grabbed a pen and a piece of paper and wrote Callen's number down.

Konstantin smiled. Sam could see that whoever this man was he was ruthless and more than likely a killer.

* * *

Callen had barricaded his door.

There was no way he was talking to Granger right now, he wasn't sure what game he was playing. But there was no way that man was his father. Even if he was, he had lost the right to that title years ago.

Granger was standing outside the window that looked into his room, talking to Alex as his son paced up and down inside the room shooting angry glances at him once in awhile.

"You really are his father?" Alex asked as they watched him pace.

Granger nodded. "I should have told him earlier, I knew this wasn't the right time to tell him. But he's suffered so much, I couldn't stand by and not be here for him anymore."

Alex looked at the older man. The concern for his child was evident.

"Did Agent Callen have no idea you were his father?"

Granger shook his head, "None, it was for his safety."

"You two will need to talk at some point. I know he doesn't know his first name, maybe you can tell him."

"I kept it from him, for his own safety."

"You may not have noticed, but he is a grown man, and a federal agent, I pretty much think he can take care of himself."

"Yet he's here and you're working with him." Granger growled.

"What happened to your son does not make him weak. He was programmed from a young age to believe this behavior was normal."

Granger's face darkened and he turned away from the sight of his son's distress as Callen walked over to his phone.

"You think it's my fault?" He growled.

"Not at all, you didn't do this to him. I am not here to assign blame, I am here to get your son to realize he has self worth. That he is not the product of his conditioning. He is a human being, a person with wants and needs of his own. He will learn that he is allowed to have these without repercussions. That is why I am here."

Both men turned as Callen opened the door.

"Callen?" Granger said, hoping he had changed his mind about talking to him.

Callen glared at him. "I want one word from you… One word only… What is my name?" He asked.

Granger wanted to ask him why the change of heart, but something in his son's demeanor made him not ask.

"Grant. Your name is Grant Owen Callen."

Callen gave a curt nod in acknowledgement and headed for the door.

"Grant; Where are you going?" Owen called after his son.

"To fix a problem." He stopped for a moment to talk to Alex, "Thank you for your help, I know we only did one session, but I'm fine now."

"Agent Callen you are far from well, you can't be thinking of leaving."

Owen grabbed him by the arm, "You are not well enough to leave."

"Sam needs me. After all the times Sam has been there to help me, I'm not leaving him."

"You need to heal, to work through this." Owen argued.

"Work through what? I am what _you_ made me. _You_ hid my name and threw me to the wolves. Now when someone actually needs me you expect me to stay here!"

"Grant, what's going on?" Owen asked.

Callen threw his phone at his father, "Your past is yet again wrecking _my_ life!" he snapped heading for the door.

Owen looked at the message, Nate and Sam sat side by side, both with a gun pointed at their heads.

"You know where this is Agent Callen. If you do not want them to die be here in two hours with the location of Reznikov. A life for a life, yours for theirs will you trade? We are at the cabin you own with the little woman."

Owen looked up, but his son was gone.

"Dammit!" he cursed, running down the hallway looking for him.

* * *

Hetty sat in her office at OSP. She smiled as Deeks and Kensi showed their new son where they worked.

He giggled as Eric allowed him to blow an air horn to attract his new parent's attention after being taken to check out Ops by the technician.

"Mama, Daddy, Look!" Martin giggled as Eric covered his ears.

Deeks took the air horn.

"Martin Donald Deeks, once was enough!" Deeks chided his son who couldn't help but laugh as he was lifted up and twirled in the air.

"I got to say hi to Abby, she's in Washington D.C. That's millions of miles away!" Martin told them.

Kensi laughed, "Not millions Martin, but you're right, it is a long long way."

"Abby was talking to Auntie Nell, she said she's my auntie too."

Kensi smiled, "You have lots of family now." she told him.

Martin walked away and sat on the top step his face curled up in concentration, then he smiled a brilliant smile. If Kensi hadn't known that Martin was adopted he would have sworn to any deity listening that Marty and Martin truly were father and son.

"That means I get lots of presents at Christmas right? Auntie Abby said I would. But how do I get them all presents?"

"Maybe we can make them." Nell said coming around the corner mouthing a sorry to Kensi.

Kensi didn't care, anything that put a smile on her child's face made her happy.

Martin jumped and scrambled behind her as the main door flew open and Owen stormed in.

"Hetty!" he yelled.

Deeks nodded to Kensi, "Take Martin back to Ops." he hissed as he listened in.

Kensi handed Martin to Nell, who moved to comply.

"Owen." Hetty said, looking up at the angry man in front of her.

"You have a cabin with Callen, where is it?" He demanded.

"Mr. Hanna is recuperating there right now. I will not have you disrupting his recovery." She said. She wasn't sure why Granger was so angry, unless he had found out about Callen and Sam.

"Now is not the time to keep secrets Henrietta, I need to know where it is!"

"You will not interfere, I do not know what Mr. Callen has told you…"

"Dammit, Hetty. He's in danger!"

"Who? Mr. Hanna?" She went to pick up the phone.

"Callen's gone alone. He doesn't know who's there, but he knows Sam's in danger." Granger held the phone out.

"I will send Ms Blye and…"

"No!" Granger slammed both fists on the table, "I won't let you do this again. I will not fail him because I trusted you! Now, _WHERE IS MY SON_!" he yelled.

Hetty blinked in surprise. She had thought maybe Owen was a relation, but Reznikov, he was Callen's father.

"Owen?"

"Let the recriminations come later Hetty, Grant needs me now."

Hetty nodded, "We need to go to Ops." She said and walked out of her office.

* * *

Nell took Martin out as Hetty and Granger walked in.

"We have a situation." Granger said.

"Mr Beale can you open file Gavan1, it is a link to a home surveillance system."

Owen smiled, "Haven… Nice."

"Mr. Callen named it." Hetty admitted. Turning her attention back to the screen, she gasped as the picture came up. Instead of just Nate and Sam. There were four armed men, three standing and one sitting drinking a coffee.

"Chernov." Granger growled. "We need to get there now!"

"Who is that?" Hetty asked.

"Major Konstantin Chernov, Ex- Russian KGB. He'll kill Callen I know he will!"

"Why?" Hetty asked the man didn't look like a threat, something in him said he wasn't going to kill him.

"He hates me, he always has."

"Known him long?" Deeks asked.

Owen sighed, "All my life. Konstantin in my cousin. He blames Clara, Callen's mother for my defection. Now Hetty, please, where is this?"

Hetty wrote the address out. "Ms Blye, Mr. Deeks we will watch young Martin, please would you accompany Mr. Granger?"

They both nodded and headed out, Kensi to the armory and Deeks to Martin and Nell.

Granger looked at Hetty, "I have a lot to explain, I will do so when I get back."

Hetty shook her head as she headed for the door, "It's a two hour drive Owen, you can fill me in on the way."


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Hetty drove as Granger looked out of the window, his mind miles away, worried about what his son would do in his current state of mind.

He knew he had made mistakes. Many, many mistakes, some he could atone for he hoped, others would have to just be chalked up to experience.

Hetty let him sit with his thoughts for a while, trying to balance out the revelations in her own head that he was in fact, the father that Callen had been searching for all those years.

"Why didn't you tell Callen you were his father when you found him?" She asked.

Granger shook his head, "I couldn't… He hated me Henrietta, you saw that."

"He didn't know you, you had me 'prisoner' in the boat shed."

"What would I have said, Hey son, I know I'm holding your boss, but it's ok I'm your father?"

Hetty sighed, he was right that hadn't been the right time, but he could and should have said something.

"Why didn't you go looking for him when he was younger?" She asked.

Granger was silent. He didn't want to go there, but he knew he needed to tell someone.

"Clara was supposed to go alone to meet you on the beach that day. I was at the Dacha, packing the last of our things. Amy was being behaved and helping me. Grant was only four, he was having a temper tantrum. He had a nasty temper as a child, It reminded me of my mother. She would sit and stew on something bothering her for days until she blew, Grant was a lot like that." He paused as Hetty negotiated a hard stretch of road, thankful for the break.

"Grant screamed blue murder for hours until Clara gave in and took him with her to meet you. He didn't like staying with me even then. Grant has always been Clara's son more than mine." He said ruefully, Amy had been a daddy's girl, but Grant had been his mother's protector since he could walk. Always spending time with her rather than him.

"I waited for you to come back with them, we waited until it was dark. I stayed with Amy while Hans, who had come to help us out of the country searched for Clara and Grant." He trailed off again as the memory assailed him. "He found Grant an hour later on the beach beside Clara's body. He hadn't moved a muscle, he was frozen in fear. The Comescu's had cleared the beach and we knew that they were waiting for me to show up and take the boy so they could shoot me too. Hans picked Grant up and went on ahead, not meeting up with me, but heading straight to America, he was followed and left Grant on the doorstep of a nearby orphanage. We didn't know the shock had affected his memory. He couldn't remember his name. We thought that would be safer for him."

"Why Callen not Granger?" Hetty asked, breaking his musing.

"I never married Clara, She didn't know me as Owen Granger I didn't take this name till later, She knew me as Nikita Reznikov. I was born in Russia, I was with the KGB until Clara met me and got me to work for the CIA. I said to her that Americanized names would be better for the children as we were planning to go there. So Amy and Grant. By the time Amy and I made it to America I was told Hans had died. Grant had been put into the foster system but I lost touch with him for a while."

"Did you look?" Hetty asked.

An anguished look crossed Granger's face. "I went to work with the CIA, I was sent on assignment soon after. I had to put Amy into the system for a while, for her safety. When I went to get her I found out she had died. I couldn't find Grant. There was no record of a Grant Callen in the system."

"So you stopped looking?" Hetty's hands tightened imperceptibly on the steering wheel.

"For a while, it hurt too much having to bury Amy."

"Did you look for him?" She asked again.

Granger sighed, "I did. I even found him once."

* * *

Hetty pulled over to the side of the road, "You found him, and yet you never took him in?"

"He wasn't my son." Granger said angrily, "That... That boy wasn't my son, he was…" He turned away from Hetty in shame.

"He was sitting on a wall outside the Los Angeles County Children's Services offices. I knew it was him, he looked like his mother, and those eyes, he couldn't be anyone else. I sat in the car and watched him. I was so… He wasn't my son, he was angry, rebellious, sitting on a wall a can of alcohol by his feet and he was smoking. There was a security guard watching him, but he hadn't approached him, like he was afraid of him. It was obvious he was a delinquent and he hated everyone. I watched as his latest foster family approached him, how he was with the mother, how he practically drooled over the elder son, he was manipulative and cunning. I couldn't go to him then."

"Then was when he probably needed you the most Owen." Hetty chastised him.

"I know, I did some background digging to find out what had happened. I knew as much as he ever said about Bill and his brother, I heard rumors about what Grant had done when he had got back to the group home. How other kids had asked to go and stay with Nick after he urged them to go. How over the years only a few would come back. I lost faith in him." It was hard for Owen to admit it, "I didn't want him, not like that. I couldn't get him back and then lose him to prison in the future."

Hetty waited, she wanted to curse him for failing her boy, the boy she had rescued from just that fate and trusted him enough to know he would be a good man.

"Amy had been perfect, like her mother. But I found that Grant, he was damaged. I just assumed it was because he had witnessed his mother's murder. I thought he was… defective."

Hetty sighed, putting her hand on his arm, "Oh Owen."

"I was so wrong, I made so many mistakes and Grant paid for them all. I don't know if he will forgive me. I don't know if I will ever forgive me. I was hurting Hetty and I took that hurt out on everyone around me."

"And Grant paid the highest price?" Hetty asked.

"Not just him, his sister's too, Amy paid with her life, and Jennifer…"

"Jennifer?" Hetty asked, surprised.

"I went back into deep cover, I was sent to Korea as a businessman my contact was a North Korean double agent. I got too close, Mai Lin gave birth to Jennifer my daughter in 1981. We arrested her a few months back. I had her transferred."

"Does she know you are her father?" Hetty asked.

Granger nodded, "I told her as I had her transferred and I paid for her lawyer."

"Are you planning on informing Mr. Callen that he has a younger sister?" Hetty asked.

Granger shook his head, "Not yet. Right now Jen is safe and I want her to stay that way. I need to focus on helping my son before I lose him, although I am worried I may be too late."

Hetty restarted the car, "You will have to deal with this later Owen, but we need to know about Konstantin, how much of a threat is he to Mr. Hanna and Mr. Getz?"

"Almost none, but that temper, I told you about, the one Grant showed. It is the same one my cousin has."

"I hope we get there in time to stop Mr. Callen from doing something rash."

* * *

Callen ignored the pain in his back as he drove to the cabin.

He was furious that someone else had found it. It had been his and Hetty's Haven from the world, the harsh realities of life. It was where Hetty had taken him as a boy and taught him to trust, to be a useful person. Where he had learned self worth.

These men were destroying that haven and he wasn't going to let that happen. Worse, they had put Sam in danger.

Sam may not love him, but what he felt for Sam couldn't be quantified. He needed to make sure he was safe. He didn't know why, but whenever he thought of Sam in danger a scream sounded in the back of his head and a woman's voice telling him not to look and to be brave.

He knew he had failed that voice, he hadn't been brave, he had been scared and nothing had been good since that day, until he had met Sam. Sam was always his home, the place he felt safe. Sam had always protected him. He was not going to let him down. He would gladly lay down what was left of his miserable and broken life if it meant keeping Sam safe. Not only because he had a family that needed him, but because he loved him.

He turned down the dirt road, that he knew was the only track to the cabin and stopped just out of sight. Climbing out of the car, he checked his weapons and ammo he had with him. Then he began the short, but painful trek to the cabin.

* * *

Konstantin looked at the clock, it was already past the time limit he had set the boy to arrive.

"I don't think he is coming, maybe you are not as important to him as I thought you were."

"He'll be here. When he comes you won't see him coming, you have no idea who you are dealing with." Sam retorted confidently.

Konstantin laughed, "I have been watching him for a while. You say he doesn't know who his father is, but I have seen them together. So which one of you is lying?"

"All G has, is a name, he has never met his father. He would have told me if he had." Sam replied.

Konstantin snapped, pulling his gun and walking over to place the barrel on Sam's temple. "Is that right, maybe _you_ are lying to me, maybe Callen does not care as much for you as we thought."

"Back off from him." Callen's voice cut through the tension like a knife.

Nate breathed a sigh of relief and Sam held his breath in worry.

"Callen… I see you got my message." Konstantin snarled, "Where is your father?"

"I don't have one." Callen said flatly. Raising his arms as the others searched him and took the weapons he wanted them to find, not realizing he had been there long enough to hide a few, not including the ones he had already hidden around the cabin years ago.

"It has been a long time Couzin." Konstantin said as he motioned for Callen to enter.

"We've met?" Callen asked.

Konstantin smiled, "It was not only Comescu's on the beach that day. You have me to thank for them not killing you."

Callen's hands balled into fists as his memory released another of its deeply held secrets and he remembered a man talking to his mother and turning his head to make him watch.

Konstantin smiled, "I see you remember. It was a beautiful sight was it not?"

Two men grabbed Callen's arms as screaming he launched himself at the older man.

"Now, now… If you hurt me, you may get to see the same sight again, I wonder if his brains would look the same as your mother's did as they left her."

"Bastard!" Callen snarled struggling in the two men's grips.

"She was Roma, she was trash as are you. We were nobility, related to Pyotr Gorchakov, and he spat on that tradition, on our family. Betraying Russia and our family for a gypsy."

Callen struggled again, but stopped as the gun was pressed again into Sam's temple.

"Stop!" He begged. "Please, let them go."

Konstantin took the gun a fraction away from Sam's head.

"Where is your father?"

"I don't know and I don't care." Callen spat.

"Are you protecting him?" Konstantin asked surprised.

"I don't give a crap about him, but if you think killing me will get you to him go ahead, just let them go. You'll be disappointed though, I doubt he will even bother to come here."

Sam looked at Callen, he was calm, too calm. It unnerved him.

"G?"

Callen smiled at Sam, "It'll be ok." he said, trying and failing miserably to reassure him.

Sam, knowing him as well as he did looked even more worried. Something had happened since he had last seen him. Callen seemed to have given up. As if he didn't care anymore. He didn't want to out himself in front of these men, but he was scared for G.

"I know it will G, because you aren't going to do anything stupid."

Callen laughed, "Too late for that one. Now, Sam… take Nate and leave."

"You think I will just let them walk out of here?" Konstantin asked.

Callen sighed as if he were tired, "You want my father, I'll call him after they leave."

Konstantin looked stunned, but he wasn't stupid.

"You call him now, when I hear his voice, then they can leave."

To Sam's surprise Callen nodded.

He reached over and took Sam's cell phone and hit a speed dial number.

"Granger?" Owen said as he answered the phone.

"Hi, _Dad_." Callen said, sneering the second word.

"Grant? Where are you?"

"I'm with family. They want to say hello."

Both Nate and Sam were stunned at what they were hearing.

"Nikita, Couzin."

"Are on your way here?" Konstantin asked.

"Of course I am Kon, let my son go. I'll come to you willingly."

Konstantin laughed, "I will wait till you get here, I already have made a deal with your son, maybe if you make it in time we can alter the deal."

Callen leaned over and switched off the phone.

"You talked to him, he's coming. Now… Let. Them. Go." he snarled.

For a moment Konstantin looked worried, but he sighed. "I am a man of my word, you may go."

He waved his gun in the direction of the door, Nate took a step towards the door and stopped as Sam didn't move.

Callen glanced at the clock, "Sam, GO!" He ordered.

"No, I'm not leaving you G." He shook off Nate's hand.

"I'm fine, I'm with family." He said grimly.

The other men pointed their guns and ushered both Nate and Sam towards the door. "My car is at the bottom of the drive. Go now."

Sam nodded, "Fine, I'll be back for you." He vowed.

Callen wanted to tell him he loved him, he wanted to tell him he was sorry. But as he locked eyes with Sam all his resolve fled.

"I'm sorry." He said as the three other men ushered Sam and Nate out the door and towards the driveway.

* * *

Callen turned back to Konstantin, "Good, I didn't think they'd be gone in time."

Konstantin looked confused, "In time for what?" He asked.

Callen smiled as the cabin around them exploded.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

At the last moment Callen seemed to step through the fire and disappear as the house exploded around Konstantin and he was no more.

Callen, for his part had stepped past the stone fireplace and into the hidden alcove he had built when he'd had the cabin remodeled a few years ago, hoping that the heavy stone of the fireplace would protect him from the pieces of flying timber and debris that flew with the rest of the cabin. His head slammed against the stone with the force of the blast and as he blacked out his last thought was the hope that Sam was far enough away that he hadn't been hurt.

* * *

Outside the cabin, the others were thrown to the ground.

Hetty stamped on the brake as the car came around the corner just in time to see the cabin explode.

As fast as they could, they got out. Tied up Konstantin's men and tried to rouse Sam and Nate as Granger walked around the outside of the building. He ran up to Sam and started shaking him.

"Where's Callen?" he asked.

Sam looked at the house, his face a picture of defeat.

"He's…" He pointed to the cabin.

Granger took a few steps towards the flaming rubble and fell to his knees. "Grant?" He breathed, "I'm so sorry."

Sam stood up shaking his head, "He's not dead."

Hetty and Nate walked up to him.

"No one could have survived that blast Sam." Nate told him.

Sam shook his head, "It's G, He's not dead." He affirmed.

Sam looked at Nate the grief and anguish written all over his face, "He can't be dead." A tear rolled down Sam's face and his hand clutched at his chest as he felt his heart being torn in two.

Hetty walked up to Owen as the fire department, Paramedics and local police showed up.

He got up, walked past her and showed his badge to the police.

Explaining who they were and what he knew had happened, he watched as the three remaining men were taken into custody, leaving himself, Sam, Nate and Hetty standing watching as the fire department started combing through the debris looking for the bodies of Callen and Konstantin.

Owen was pale and stoic, not an ounce of emotion showed on his face as Konstantin's body was brought out and taken to one of two waiting ambulances.

The firemen went back in, after about ten minutes the radios on the firemen nearest to them went crazy, activity picked up and Hetty's grip on Sam's bicep tightened.

"Hetty?" Sam asked.

Hetty smiled sadly, "I think they've found him." She held her breath fearing the worse.

Then a man called, "We need a paramedic. He's alive!"

The group let out a collective sigh of relief as Owen got up and started running towards the shell of the building as the firemen helped out a dazed and blackened Callen away from the building.

"Grant!" He called running towards his son.

Callen looked at him, his face blank for a second and then he scowled and moved away from him.

"Where's Sam?" He spoke his voice course from all the smoke, he had inhaled, "Sam?" He called again as the paramedic tried to put an oxygen mask on him. "No, I need to know he's safe… Sam!" he called fighting against the paramedics administrations.

Sam pushed his way through the small crowd of people.

"I'm here G. I'm okay."

Callen smiled, "Good." He said, his eyes rolled back and he let the exhaustion and the blackness that was clouding the edge of his vision claim him.

* * *

He knew that smell, he was back in the hospital. He felt a large hand holding his and smiled slightly.

Sam was here. Sam was safe. He knew that for a fact. The other, Konstantin was gone. He had fulfilled his promise. He had protected his family. He knew somewhere, wherever she was his mother would be proud of him. His... Granger, could rot in hell for all he cared. He had known where he was, all those years, not once had he come to find him.

The hand on his squeezed gently as its owner noticed Callen waking up.

"Sam…" Callen croaked, his voice still hoarse.

"Sam's fine Grant, it's me." Owen said.

Callen snatched his hand away.

"Leave me alone." He growled, turning away as much as his body would allow.

"We need to talk. I need to talk to you."

"I've got nothing to say and you have nothing I want to hear. Leave me alone. _Get OUT!_ " Callen pushed, the monitor above his bed started spiking and an alarm sounded down at the nurses station.

A male and female nurse entered the room.

"I'm going to have to ask you to leave." The male nurse said to Granger.

He looked back at the upset face of his son, "I'll be right outside when you need me." He promised, "I'm not going anywhere."

Callen looked away and let the nurse pumped a sedative into the cannula in his hand.

All he wanted was Sam. Sam always made things better, he needed to know that he still would, that he wasn't to blame.

He succumbed to the sedative, as it pulled him down into a nightmare.

* * *

Callen walked into the bullpen to find all the desks gone, the building was empty.

"Hello!" he called turning around, his voice echoing off the walls.

"Sam! Kensi! Deeks!" He called.

Footsteps came from the balcony and Owen stood there a black canvas Holdall in his hand.

"What do you want, _Grant?_ " His name came out as a sneer and Callen stepped back.

"Where is everyone?" He asked.

"They've gone. They don't want to be near you. I don't want to be near you. But, as your father, I suppose it fell to me to tell you."

Callen grabbed at the wrought iron support that had been the enclosure to the bullpen.

"Why?" He asked.

"You're defective, you're wrong. I know what you did. Why do you think I never came back for you. Now they know too."

"I never meant for anyone else to be hurt, I thought it was normal. I…"

"How would you know what is normal you little freak!" Owen raged. "I know you watched your mother die, you did nothing to help her, you're a coward and a coward has no place at NCIS."

Owen turned to go and Callen couldn't hold in the sob lodged in his throat.

"Papa?" he said, sad and confused as his father looked back at him in disgust and walked out of the building. The door closed, leaving Callen alone and in the dark.

The sleeping form of Callen, twisted and turned, the anguish on his face was clear even in his sleep.

"Papa?" The word wrenched from his lips a lone tear falling from the corner of his eye and as so often happened in his life it slipped unnoticed down the side of his face.

* * *

Granger stood in the hallway toe to toe with the male nurse who had ejected him.

"I am not leaving him alone!" he snapped.

"Sir, Your presence is clearly upsetting to our patient, I suggest you wait here and let him sleep."

"You sedated him?" Sam's voice came from behind Granger as the rest of the team showed up.

"We had to, he was upset and fretting." The female nurse replied.

"I need to get in there." Sam said, moving towards the door.

"I'm sorry next of kin only." She informed him.

"That would be me." Granger replied. "Owen Granger."

The nurse looked at her clipboard.

"No, sorry, it's a Henrietta Lange or a Sam Hanna."

"I'm Sam." Sam said, pulling out his ID.

"You're his next of kin?" She asked surprised.

"I'm his partner." He explained.

"Oh?!" She said surprise lacing her voice. She sighed, wondering why all the good men were taken or gay. "Come on then, he'll want you there when he wakes."

* * *

They walked the short distance to Callen's room and opened the door in time to hear Callen's last word.

Sam stepped in and grabbed Callen's hand. "It's ok G, I'm here, you're not alone." He said softly stroking his hand across Callen's forehead.

The nurse watched with a small smile as Callen's heart rate calmed down and his hand tightened noticeably on the other man's hand.

Sam repeated his litany, "It's ok G, I'm here, you're not alone."

Finally Callen fell deeper into an uneventful sleep.

Sam sat quietly, never at any point letting go of Callen's hand.

Deeks and Kensi came in, stayed for a while, but then needed to go to collect Martin from Nell. Hetty sat outside with Owen for a few hours.

Nate walked in and stood silently, his back to the door for a few moments as he watched Sam.

Sam hadn't even noticed the intrusion, he just softly rubbed his hand up and down Callen's forearm, making sure the other man knew somewhere in his head that he wasn't alone.

"Wake up G. You need to come back to me, I can't do this without you. You can't make me do this alone. I love you G. Please, come back to me." He mumbled repeatedly.

Callen blinked as he slowly came back to consciousness, a voice cutting through the haze.

"Come back to me."

"Sam?" He croaked. "Sam, don't leave me? I'm sorry."

Sam smiled as Callen spoke.

"I'm never gonna leave you G." he promised.

Callen opened his eyes, the sedative still in his system as he rubbed his sore throat.

"I'm sorry Sam." He said locking his eyes on the deep brown ones of his partner.

Sam leaned forward and kissed G on the forehead.

"You have nothing to be sorry about Brat. You haven't done anything wrong. Except scare the hell outta me. I thought you were dead!"

"Did my job, what I'm good for, had an escape route." He rasped.

Sam handed him a glass of water with a straw.

"You inhaled too much smoke, you totalled the cabin." Sam said with a slight smirk.

"Did the job. Granger is safe, you and Nate are safe."

"About that…" Nate said, moving from his spot by the door. "Granger is your father?"

Callen's face clouded.

"No." He shook his head.

"But you told Konstantin…"

"I told him what he wanted to hear. Granger is not my father. Nikita Reznikov was… He died."

"You're sure about that?"

"My family died when I was five." Callen coughed, "I… I need to rest… throat." he pointed to his throat and Nate nodded.

"You rest, I'll take Sam to get something to eat."

"I won't be long G, you stay here and rest." Sam kissed him again, not caring that Nate was in the room. "Maybe I'll bring you back some tea."

Callen smiled and gripped Sam's hand. "Thank you." he rasped and lay back down, closing his eyes again.

* * *

Granger stood just outside the door as Nate and Sam exited.

Nate pulled Granger to one side. "I don't know what's going on with you and Callen, but if you are planning on messing with his head, don't."

"I know what's best for my son."

"That's what I mean." Nate snapped back as Sam watched with a newfound appreciation of the man. "He's in a bad place right now and you're telling him you're his father?"

Granger pulled an envelope from his pocket, "Look…" He thrust it at Nate. "DNA proof for you!"

Nate took a deep breath as he looked at the paper, the proof was undeniable.

"Why didn't you tell him earlier?"

Granger shook his head, "I wasn't aware I answered to you, Getz." He snarled.

"You don't, but as Callen's doctor, I can and will protect his well being." Nate squared up to him.

"As his partner so will I." Sam added looking at Nate approvingly.

"What I do or do not tell my son is of no concern to either of you." Granger stalked away, he was mad and there was no way he was telling either of them something he had never worked out for himself.

"Granger!" Nate hurried to catch up to him.

"What?" He scowled as he turned around.

"You are as welcome to use my services as your son is, maybe a group session? Somewhere informal, so you can both talk without recriminations." He offered with a small smile. He hoped that if Callen and Granger both talked maybe Callen could have the family he longed for.

Granger's face softened, "Thank you, if you can get him to agree, I think I would like that."

Nate gave a curt nod and turned his attention back to Sam, who swayed a little, imperceptible to most, but Nate knew he needed food and his medication which he had already skipped two doses in his worry for his partner.

He walked back over to Sam and waited for a moment as Sam glared at Granger's retreating form.

"Come on, you need to take your meds and eat. Callen needs you to be strong." Nate prodded gently and Sam smiled.

"Thanks Nate." He replied and went with him.

* * *

Hetty sat watching her sleeping agent.

Looking at him now she could see similarities between the man and his father. She allowed herself a small smile as he moved for a moment his lip pouting a move she had seen his mother make many times before.

She wished that things had been different for him, but she was determined that from now on he would know that people cared, his team, his family cared for him.

She thought about what Owen had said to her, about finding Callen when he was younger. She wondered, was this the reason that when they had first met Callen had eyed him with such distrust? Deep down had Callen always known?

She wouldn't know anything until he awoke. So she took a small pad and pencil from her purse, while she was waiting she would make herself useful and started planning the rebuild of their cabin.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

Callen sat on the bed, his bag sitting at his feet, waiting.

He wanted to go, but Sam had ordered him to wait. He hoped he was heading home with him. After being in hospital for a month, being reassured by Sam that he was here for him. That Sam's own injuries were nearly healed and that despite what he had thought, Sam loved him. He wanted to go home, or anywhere else where he and Sam could be alone.

Not once in the entire month had he seen Granger. He had put a ban on him knowing anything about him or contacting him for anything that wasn't case or work related.

Hetty and Nate had tried, but Callen had stuck to his guns.

Even Sam had tried talking to him, even at one point ordering him, but Callen had stuck to his guns and used his safe word.

"I'm not talking, not about this Sam." Callen had told him, "I'm not saying never, just not right now, ok?"

Sam had put his hands on his lover's shoulders and looked deep into his eyes. "You will talk to me when you are ready though, right?" He asked.

Callen smiled sadly. "I will." He promised, reaching up and pulling Sam into a kiss that left them both wanting more.

"Stay here." Sam had said, "I'm getting your discharge papers and we are going home."

Callen had smiled at that word, home with Sam. No matter how temporary his time with Sam was, he was still his home and he relished in every moment of it.

He had spent the last week with Hetty going over ideas for the rebuilding of Haven. Callen had himself insisted on a bigger bedroom and a hot tub and sauna, hoping that once it was rebuilt he'd be able to take Sam there to show him the surrounding area.

The view from the top of the mountain above the cabin was the place where Callen went to recharge his soul, more than anything he wanted to share it with Sam.

Sam had taken a long time reassuring Callen that he wasn't to blame for what Nick and Bill had done to him. It took him another three days and a few sessions with Nate to prove to him that what they had was nothing like he'd had with them.

Callen still had a niggling doubt, but was trying his best to quash it, every day he spent with Sam.

* * *

Granger paced the outside of the hospital, he knew Callen was being discharged today. Hetty had let it slip. He wanted to, at least, see his son had healed. He had a lot to tell him, things he needed to explain, but Grant wasn't giving an inch, he wasn't even picking up his calls.

Every time he had tried in the last month to see him, he had been told that he was banned. He'd gone to see if Sam or Hetty could talk to Grant to make him change his mind. But his son had been adamant that he was not going to even meet with him. He even tried going through Nate offering to be available for a family therapy session. Apparently Callen's reply to that had been if he had a family that needed therapy, he would do it, but as _his_ family was dead, he was good. Making Granger sure that he would probably never find out why his son, who had wanted so much to have a family and a father, had pushed him away.

Callen sat in the wheelchair as Sam wheeled him to the entrance to the hospital.

Finally, he stopped and Callen looked up, the look of trust on his face when he looked at Sam pulled on Granger's heart.

"Can I get up now?" He asked, barely suppressing his grin, both his joy at being released and the fact that Sam had just brushed his fingers down his jawline radiating off him like a beacon in the dark.

Sam nodded, "Cars in the lot, I'll take your bag." He picked up Callen's holdall and held his hand out for him.

For a moment Callen hesitated, but Sam gave him a knowing look and Callen smiled.

Sam had promised him what they had wasn't wrong, he wasn't going to hide it and he wasn't going to leave him. This was Sam's first proof of that outside of the hospital room.

Callen took a few steps out of the hospital and stopped, sitting for a moment on a low wall just outside the doors. He looked wistfully at the sky as Sam watched him worried.

"You ok?" he asked.

Callen smiled and nodded.

"I didn't think I was going to make it Sam. I hoped you'd got far enough away, but I wasn't sure I was going to make it." He admitted.

Sam sat next to him his arm resting lightly on Callen's leg.

"I wouldn't have made it without you." He admitted. He turned and kissed Callen gently.

For a moment Callen smiled, then his face clouded and he stood up.

"Which way is the car." He said his voice hard and flat.

"G?" Sam was worried until he saw what Callen was glowering at.

Granger was watching them from his car about twenty feet away.

"Did you tell _him_ I was being discharged today?" Callen asked.

Sam shook his head, "I haven't talked to him in about three weeks. Not since he tried to get me to lift the ban on his visiting you."

Callen stopped and turned taking his attention away from Sam in surprise.

"He wanted to see me?"

Sam nodded, "But you were insistent that you needed space."

Callen balled up his fist for a moment controlling his anger. He turned and walked up to the car.

Granger wound down the window.

"Grant, I…"

"Leave me alone, you are _not_ my father, you are nothing more to me than the assistant director, do you understand? My name is G. That's it, nothing else. Now if you don't stop following me, _Assistant Director Granger,_ I'll have you up on harassment charges." Without another word he turned and headed back to Sam.

"You good G?" Sam asked, looking back at the anguished look on Granger's face.

Grimly Callen nodded as he walked past Sam heading in the direction of the car.

* * *

Sam pulled up outside Callen's house.

"I added to the bed." Sam admitted as they walked to the door.

"You changed the bed?" Callen asked worried. He'd gone to a lot of trouble to pick out the perfect bed for him and Sam.

Sam pulled him in close in the alcove by his door. "I would _never_ change that bed. You showed me how much you loved me by buying it. I said, I _added,_ G." He put the key in the lock and opened the door.

Callen stood in shock, there was furniture in his house.

Lived in, recognizable furniture.

"That's your couch!" he said, pointing to the well worn leather couch in the center of his living room, "And your rug, Sam?"

Sam pulled him in and closed the door.

"I'm not living with Michelle anymore. It wasn't nasty, but she could see how much I was hurting without you."

Callen sat on the couch, a part of him was ecstatic. Sam was his, but Michelle? He didn't want her hating him.

He jumped as she walked around the corner.

"Welcome home Callen."

"M... Michelle, I..?" He stood up having no idea what to say to her.

She walked up to him and wrapped her arms around him. "It's ok Callen, Sam and I haven't been together… well, like that, in a while. I'm ok with this."

"What about Aiden and Kamran?" Callen asked amazed.

"They understand that we still care about each other and love them, they still love you too, you are and always will be uncle G. We raised our kids not to be bigots, they know their father loves them and he loves me, but he needs to be with you."

Callen sat heavily down on the couch in shock.

"I knew you were both going to end up together the day I went with you to buy the bed. Why did you think I was so picky on what type of bed you two needed?" Michelle added.

"You're living with _me_?" Callen asked in shock. It was the one thing he had dreamed about.

Sam smiled and sat next to him. "If you'll have me?"

Callen pulled him closer and kissed him. "Yes." he breathed when they finally broke apart.

Michelle stood there with a goofy grin on her face.

"You two are sweet together. Well, I'm picking Kam up from school, I'll see you both later for dinner?" She asked.

Sam nodded, "Sure 'Chelle, we'll be over at 7."

She turned and left.

"What was that?" Callen asked.

"That was a super amicable, kinda split." Sam said. "I still love Michelle, but I couldn't sleep with her anymore. I felt like I was cheating on you. She's smart she knew it was coming, she prepared the kids. They are fine, I see Kam everyday keep things as normal as possible for her. Aiden understands and he's fine with it." Sam laughed, "When I told him he just hugged me and said it was about time and that it was the twenty first century now, and it was about time I made an honest man of you."

Callen laughed, "So... You're here, like, forever here?"

Sam wrapped his arms around Callen making him feel calm and protected, "Yes G. I'll never leave you. Nearly losing you was a wake up call to me. I love you G. Callen."

"I love you Sam." Callen stopped as he realized what he said. "I do… I do love you." He braced himself, not sure what reaction he was going to get.

Sam said nothing, he didn't need to, the smile and the way his arms enveloped Callen said it all for him.

* * *

Granger sat down the street in his car as he watched his son and Sam walk back into their home after what had been a good evening with Sam's ex-wife.

He watched as they went inside and lights went on, his eyes straying to the other cars parked near their home. Instantly alert when cars drove past the house.

He needed to talk to his son, to explain, but even that was on the backburner right now.

He looked again at the email on his phone.

It was from an unknown sender to a little known email account in his name. It was just two words, but those two words sent chills down his spine.

 ** _' THEY KNOW!'_**

He'd received it three weeks ago and hadn't let Grant out of his sight, as much as was humanly possible since then. He wasn't going to let his son's outburst earlier stop him from doing what he had been doing most of his life, protecting him.

He had recommended him for the job in the office of special projects, knowing that the undercover work they did would keep him off the radar as he wouldn't be living with his own name but an alias. For the most part it had worked, until Marcel Janvier had told the Comescu's of his son's whereabouts and they had popped up on Hetty's radar forcing her to go to Romania to protect him. He sat thinking back to the day when his son had been born.

Amy had been with him in the main room of their little Dacha, while the midwife was in the bedroom with Clara.

She had been concerned with her mother's screams until he had sat with her and explained her new brother or sister needed to hear the loud noises, so he or she knew which way to go to be born.

* * *

"But papa?" Amy asked, "Why not just give the baby a map?"

Nikita smiled, "The baby is too small to read, so this way he or she hears your mother's voice, like when she needs you and calls you, well your mother needs the baby so she's calling."

Amy shrugged, "Ok papa." she turned back to the picture she was making for her mother, ignoring the noises until a shrill cry echoed around the house.

The midwife walked out wiping a bloody hand on a towel.

"You have a son Nikita." She shook her head, "I am sorry."

He walked up to her, "I have paid you enough, you will speak of this to no one. Anyone finds out about either of my children and I will find you. Vy ponimayete?"

The woman nodded, fearfully. "I will tell no one Nikita, I was your Kormilitsa and I will always be loyal to you."

He hugged the woman, "I know Anya, and I to you and your family."

"I will miss you when you go." She said sadly.

Nikita sighed, "I can't stay here. The KGB are after me, Clara needs to get back to America with our children and my father and brother are still looking for me."

She smiled sadly. "Come child, see your son. He is beautiful, however, he does look like your father."

Nikita walked into the room to see Clara holding the newborn child, he was struck by the cobalt blue eyes, they looked just like his father's.

He dampened down the feelings he had while looking at him and realized that if he were to be raised without any of the coddling his father would insist his son had, indoctrination into the party and the way of life he had lived, he needed to make sure his son was far far away. He kissed Clara gently.

"Are you going home?" She asked.

He nodded, "This will be the last time. I have a few things left to sort out. They have no idea yet that I am leaving. They don't know about you or Amy. We will leave Russia as soon as you and the baby are fit to travel, I have friends in Romania who will take us in, there is a small Dacha there we can stay until the children are old enough to travel. I still have a few people who need my help and I cannot leave them stranded."

Clara nodded, "I know my love, I will contact Arkady, he has offered to get me more supplies."

"I don't like him." Nikita said.

Clara smiled, "I know my love, but he is a valuable contact and my handler here. He has kept our secret and he will protect our children, of that I am certain."

Nikita shook his head sadly, "You do not have to see him with my father."

"It is a cover, just as mine was. He has the same goals as we do."

"I know, but I don't like how he goes about it."

Clara sighed as the baby sniffled looking for milk and she placed him at her breast. "We do what we can to protect our children." She said calmly.

"Always," Nikita vowed kissing her and then he left to bring his daughter to meet her baby brother.

* * *

Granger's focus shifted back to the present as he watched a lone figure exit an SUV and head towards Callen's home.

He exited the vehicle and followed him, getting the man into a headlock.

"Who sent you?" He asked, his voice angry and hushed not wanting to disturb the two men inside.

"Marcel and Anatoly. I was not to harm the boy, but to make contact with you. I am not armed." The man said, raising his arms to show he was in fact unarmed.

"What do they want."

"They want what the boy has, they want the list."

"Marcel knows your son has the list, he got a very close look at him last time your people had him, he saw the 'birthmark' he knows what it is."

Granger paled.

"You will give me the list or the next person to see your son will kill him."

"Where were you to meet them?" Granger asked.

"Santa Monica, by the pier." The man replied. "I need to take him your reply."

"Oh, you will." Granger smiled sadistically as he snapped the man's neck.

* * *

Sam watched Callen sleep, memorizing every inch of him from his face, to his body, to the small lump on his left earlobe, a birthmark he'd had since birth.

Sam had asked him about having it removed, but Callen had shaken his head.

It was a part of him and it didn't hurt, it never even bothered him, it was just there. Sam stroked the earlobe lovingly. It was as if he was wearing an earring, showing Sam in his own undercover way that he was taken, and by Sam no less.

It being permanent meant it was there forever like Sam's love for Callen.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17

Nate sat in his office going over Granger's file after managing to get Director Vance to release as much personal information as he had on the man.

He wanted to know why Granger had requested to join NCIS over three years after Callen had joined, what it was that had motivated him to move closer to his son.

Looking at the picture of the two men he could see vague similarities but nothing that screamed father and son. He looked at the pictures of Granger's/Reznikov's family. There he could see the resemblance.

Callen was the spitting image of his grandfather.

He looked into the background of Anatoli Reznikov and shuddered. He had been high in the Presidium, friends with Brezhnev and a Major General in the KGB. He had been responsible for the disappearance of a few Russian Dissidents over the years.

Anatoli Reznikov was by all he could see a hard line Communist. He used the search program that Eric had written for him and looked up Nikita's file. Such as it was. A lot was redacted by the CIA, but it seemed that Nikita was a model son, he'd been slated for a top job in the KGB riding on the success of his father.

Nikita/Granger had joined the KGB in the mid 1960's and had quickly climbed the ranks, earning the rank of Major in 1968. Then in the early 1970's he was denounced as a separatist and a traitor, working with the CIA. He disappeared early 1974 about the same time Owen Granger joined the CIA.

"What are you hiding?" Nate asked himself as he reviewed Granger's files.

He had risen up the ranks of the CIA only those at the top had known his true name. None had made the connection between him and Callen. But his name popped up from time to time when Callen was sent on assignments. Looking at these Nate could see where Granger had pulled strings to get assistance sent to Callen's aide once or twice.

Then in 2009 Callen had been shot after an assignment which was a joint NCIS operation with the MCRT in D.C.

Granger had still stayed behind the scenes, assigning a CIA unit to discreetly look into the shooting, liaising with Lara Macy.

Until two months after the shooting.

Granger had had a meeting with SecNav, after which Director Vance had been called in to see him and they had insisted that the Office of Special Projects be disbanded. Nate looked up shocked at the turn of events, he'd had no idea how close the elite team had been to being disbanded.

Lara Macy had been fired and Hetty had seemingly appeared from nowhere and been assigned operations manager. That same day Granger had quit the CIA and joined NCIS as assistant director, apparently calling in a few favors.

Nate's investigations showed that even though Jerome Kirsch was already the assistant director, they had created a parallel position for Granger specifically for the Los Angeles office.

"Why did you do that?" Nate mused aloud as he decided to take a break while he mulled the thoughts over in his head.

* * *

He walked out of the office Hetty had assigned to him to go and get a coffee. Stopping on the balcony for a moment he watched as Granger, using Callen's desk while the team wasn't there was typing on his laptop but watching Hetty at the same time.

Granger slammed down the lid in frustration and Hetty looked up at him, She lifted her tea cup and motioned him to go over.

Nate had not watched them interact before with the amount of scrutiny he was directing to their attention now. He noticed a slight tightening of Granger's jaw before he softened his face and nodded going to join her.

Hetty… Nate turned and walked back to his office to pull her file as he bumped into Nell.

"You alright Nate, you look worried?" She asked, concerned for her friend.

"You got a minute?" Nate asked.

Nell nodded and followed him into his office.

"What's up?" she asked.

"I need your help." Nate replied honestly, "I am trying to find out about Granger and Hetty."

"What do you need?" she asked.

"Hetty took this job in '09 after Callen was shot." Nate started.

"That was before my time." Nell reminded him.

Nate nodded, "I know kid. But the day Hetty was given the job of Operations Manager, Granger quit the CIA and moved to NCIS. I know he pulled strings for this job, he turned down the job of Director of NCIS and went for this one, wanting to watch over OSP. Why?" Nate asked.

"To watch over his son?" Nell posed, she smiled. She and Nate did this a lot bouncing ideas off each other, they hadn't done it in a while and she missed it.

"Maybe, but if he knew where Callen was, and it seemed he did; why wait till after he was hurt to move to NCIS?"

Nell looked puzzled, "I don't know what else changed? Maybe he wanted to meet him after nearly losing him?"

Nate shook his head, "No, that's not it, he would have told Callen he was his father years ago if that had been the case."

"So If Granger didn't come to NCIS because of Callen, why did he make the move?" Nell asked.

Nate shrugged, "I'm not sure. Macy was relocated… There was no need for that. Callen wasn't shot during a mission. But Macy was reprimanded, orders from high up, who?"

"Granger?" Nell asked.

Nate shook his head, "I don't think so, at the time of Macy's reprimand, Granger was still CIA."

"Hetty maybe?" Nell asked.

"She has been watching over Callen, for a long time." Nate said.

"Would Hetty's move to NCIS make Granger want to be closer?" Nell asked.

"Maybe… Maybe Granger was watching Hetty, but why?" Nate asked.

Nell shifted uncomfortably in her seat.

"What do you know Nell?" Nate asked.

Nell shook her head, "I don't know if it's real or not. I saw it when Hetty went to Romania, it's in her file, the non redacted one that the Director had. But, it can't be real, I mean… She would have acted on it… wouldn't she?"

"What?" Nate asked.

Nell looked around even though she knew they were alone.

"Hetty is a Comescu. Distantly related, but she has the tattoo."

"Really?"

"Director Vance told me not to mention it to anyone." Nell said worried that by telling Nate she could have just cost her, her job.

Nate smiled, "Consider this doctor patient confidentiality."

"You're not my doctor Nate." Nell replied.

Nate smiled, "But I _**am**_ Callen's and this is for his benefit. I need to know why Granger came here. Why he didn't contact Callen as soon as he found him and why Callen is refusing to even sit down and talk with him now he knows he's his father."

* * *

Callen stretched as Sam tightened his grip around him.

"Sam…?" He yawned and looked over at the clock.

"It's nearly ten a.m." Sam said, "I wondered if you were going to wake up."

Callen turned and kissed Sam gently.

"I was enjoying sleeping. I actually don't want to get up." He admitted.

Sam sat up with a small laugh, "The man who never sleeps, doesn't want to get out of bed?"

Stretching Callen nodded, "It's comfy, you're here and it's warm... And safe." he added quietly.

Sam pulled him into a hug, "I'll always keep you safe." He promised.

Callen sighed contentedly until he realized he actually did need to get up. He swung his legs over the bed and sat up, "What are we doing today?" He asked as he got up and walked into the bathroom, leaving the door open a crack so he could hear Sam's reply.

"I took Kam to school while you were sleeping, told Michelle I'd take her in tomorrow seeing as we are both on sick leave." Sam called out as Callen entered the bathroom. "Nate called."

"NO!" Callen called back. "Just tell him no."

"You have to talk to him sometime." Sam pointed to the floor as Callen walked back in, he got down on his knees while Sam stroked his head.

"I'll talk to Nate when I'm ready. I'll talk to him about anything you want…" Callen agreed as Sam ran his hand down Callen's spine.

"Will you talk about Granger?" Sam asked softly.

"NO."

"Why not?" Sam asked him, he felt Callen tense up and turn his face away. "Talk to me Brat." he urged.

"I remembered him." Callen's voice was low and his head was turned away.

"Granger?" Sam asked.

Callen nodded. "I was a teenager, just before I went to live with the Martins. I had just been through a really tough meeting with child services. I was at my lowest ebb. I felt lost, alone and unwanted, they were planning on sticking me with a new family, even though I had not wanted to go into a family again. I was sitting on the wall and I noticed this man watching me. I had seen him a few times just after I had left… you know, _them_ …" He looked up for a second and Sam saw the devastation in his eyes. "He was there after that, he'd been in the group homes I was in, I thought he was a social worker. Sam, he knew me as a child, he could have taken me in. He left me there!" Callen gave a sob and dropped his head in shame. "I wasn't sure it was him when I first saw him with Hetty, but I _knew_ I couldn't trust him." Forgetting himself Callen stood up and started pacing.

Sam watched, but said nothing for a moment.

"Dammit, Sam! He's my father, if he didn't want me how could you!"

"BRAT!" Sam's voice reverberated around the room and Callen instantly dropped to his knees.

Callen's breath came in harsh pants as he fought for control over his emotions.

"G, you have questions. But not asking him, not finding out will eat you alive. You need to talk to him. I will be there for you as will Nate, you are not alone."

"You still want me?" Callen's voice broke.

Sam lifted up his face and kissed him, "Always, I already told you I couldn't live without you in my life."

He wrapped his arms around Callen and pulled him close for a moment. "Will you talk to Nate and Granger?"

Callen nodded, his body shook and Sam knew he was afraid, but he smiled proud of him.

"We will do this together ok? You are and always will be the only man for me G." Sam vowed.

* * *

Granger couldn't believe what he was hearing, "Hetty, you're sure your information is right?" He asked.

She nodded, "We knew years ago, when we made this pact that someday he would come looking for that list, what you have told me about your encounter the other morning outside Mr. Callen's home has just proved it. Anatoli Reznikov is in Los Angeles."

Granger paled, "I thought he had died years ago, we buried him."

Hetty waited as Granger mulled over what she had said.

"It took me a long time to trust you Henrietta, I'm still not sure if I fully do." He admitted.

"I will always pay for what happened in Romania to Clara. I have tried my best over the years for your son and I would give my life for him in a heartbeat to atone for what I failed to do."

"You'll never atone for that Hetty." Granger snapped the pain in his voice all too evident. "You left my children without a mother. Just like I will never forgive myself for the loss of my daughter."

"And Mr. Callen?" Hetty asked.

Granger looked away.

"He needs you, and you need him. I know you've been watching him for a long time."

"That doesn't matter now." Granger brushed her off, "If Anatoli gets his hands on Grant and gets the list from him a lot of people will be in danger."

"You told Mr. Callen about the list?" Hetty asked surprised.

Granger shook his head, "He has the list. It's under his birthmark on his left ear is a microdot, it has the list on it."

"Why didn't you tell me earlier?" Hetty asked.

Granger looked at her in surprise, "I wasn't sure if I trusted you. I still don't know if I can, but my father is dangerous and he won't hesitate to kill anyone to get to the list."

"How did your father find out that Mr. Callen had the list?" Hetty asked.

"Janvier." Granger admitted, "He was the one who injected the list into Grant in the first place."


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

Callen paced as mad as hell. Sam sat there watching him as his brat paced his hands clenching and unclenching as his rage ran through him.

Owen and Hetty stood just inside the front door as Callen glared at Granger in anger and Hetty in disbelief.

"You brought him here?!" Callen snapped.

"Mr. Callen." Hetty said in that maddening way she had when she knew she had to calm him down. "I couldn't wait for you to get over your anger. Your father and I need to talk to you now." She watched as he screeched to a halt.

"I'll talk to you Hetty, about almost anything but I don't need to and I won't talk to him!"

"Enough!" Hetty snapped, "This isn't about you or your ego."

Callen looked at her as if she had slapped him around the face.

"Hetty?" He said, surprised and hurt.

Sam moved further into the room as if to protect his partner his eyes never leaving Granger.

"You have a bigger threat out there to you than me son." Granger said.

Callen laughed sourly, "And you care?"

Granger shook his head, "Of course I care, everyone in this room cares. This isn't a case, Eric isn't in Ops to back you up and this threat is bigger than the Comescu's."

Hetty flinched slightly at that as Granger shot her an annoyed look.

"What was that?" Callen asked.

"Nothing." Granger growled.

Callen walked up to his father and stood nose to nose, "If you won't be honest with me, then leave. I'm sick to death of all the secrets and lies."

"Please sit down Mr. Callen." Hetty said.

"Henrietta, no?" Granger interjected.

"It's about time we told him, he needs to know the truth for his own safety. Anatoli is not like my family." She said as Callen sat.

"Who are your family?" Callen asked, pointing at Hetty, "And who is Anatoli and why are you…" He looked at Granger pointedly, "Afraid of him?"

Hetty looked uncomfortable and Callen looked worriedly at her.

"Mr. Callen you have to understand, there has been a lot of secrets at play in your life, but everything that has been done was with the express goals of protecting you and your sister."

Callen sat back, seemingly unconcerned, but Sam noted the extra tension in his shoulders and stood behind him, resting his hands lightly on his shoulders.

Hetty sat stiffly, "I will understand if after this you do not want to talk to me again, but please… hear me out while I explain."

Callen nodded and waited.

* * *

"I made a huge mistake in 1974, I took the word of my family over the truth. After I found out I regretted my actions or inactions as they were and I spent the rest of my life trying to atone for the mistake I made. I was told an enemy of my family, a woman I had known for a while. A woman I had on the orders of my family befriended for information, was about to take the family out. When this woman came to me for help, I did nothing. She told me about her children, I was told this was a lie, to make me want to help her, it wasn't until afterwards I found out the awful truth." She waited as Callen watched trying to comprehend her words.

"I failed your mother, a wonderful woman, who had no intentions of hurting my family at all, a stupid feud that should never have been continued, this is why I went to Romania for you Mr. Callen, to my home, my cousin, Alexa."

"You're a Comescu?" Callen moved to stand up, but Sam's strong arms held him tight. Callen shot a look of fear at Sam.

Had he turned, had he been lying to him.

Sam looked at him with love and understanding, "You are not in danger, stay, listen to them." He said quietly in his ear, brushing a kiss to the side of his ear as he finished.

Callen sank back down, he knew from experience there was no fighting Sam when he made his mind up. He lifted his hand to hold the one on his shoulder and waited.

"Yes, Mr. Callen, I am a Comescu cousin. I do not believe in their blood feud at all and I will lay down my life if that is what it takes to keep you safe. A long time ago I made a deal to protect you."

"With who?" Callen asked.

"With me." Owen replied.

"You knew?" Callen turned his attention to the one person he had trusted for the longest his gut plummeting, she had known Owen was his father?

"No, Mr. Callen until a month ago I had no idea that Owen was your father. But I did know he was with the CIA and that he had been keeping watch for you and your family."

Callen looked confused.

"Anatoli Reznikov, he is a bigger threat than the Comescu's, bigger than Janvier even. Until a month ago, I thought he was dead and that you were safe."

"Another cousin?" Callen asked derisively, his sneer all but palpable as he addressed Owen.

Owen took a deep breath and sighed, "No. Anatoli Reznikov is my father. You see son we are alike, we both have father issues."

"What does he want with me? If you have issues with him I doubt he wants a family reunion."

"He doesn't. He wants something you have." Granger admitted, "A list of Russian families that were helped by myself, your mother and Arkady Kolcheck from Russia in the late sixties and early seventies, the list has their new names and identities."

"I don't have a list like that." Callen said, shaking his head, he would have known if he'd had something like that.

"Yes, you do, it's a microdot. Janvier implanted it in you when you were a baby, back when your mother trusted him."

"Janvier _implanted_ it?" Callen shuddered at the thought of this man knowing him so well.

He shrugged himself off from under Sam's hands and ran to the bathroom, he peeled off his shirt looking to see where it could have been implanted, the thought that Janvier had had his hands on his body as a child made him physically sick and he vomited. Washing out his mouth, he stood looking at his torso in the mirror, checking every mole and freckle he could see.

"Grant?" Granger hammered on his bathroom door and rapidly stepped back as the door was wrenched from his grasp.

"Where, where is it? Where…. Where did he touch me?" Callen's voice was shaky, but he held on, his hands on the doorframe in a vice like grip.

"Your ear, it's not a birthmark." Granger said softly.

"My…?" Callen reached up and stroked a finger over the lump on his left hand earlobe. "This?" he asked.

Granger nodded.

"And this Anatoli wants it?"

Granger nodded again, "He's sent people here already for it." He admitted.

"Why implant it in me?" Callen asked, his eyes flashing in anger and confusion, "Why make me a target? You hated me that much?"

Granger shook his head, "No… No, not at all, they were going to be less inclined to search a child and they weren't going to hurt one to see if your birthmark was real, we had planned on taking it out before you were ten and delivering it to those who needed it. But I lost you."

"Poor planning on your part then wasn't it." Callen snapped. "So when you found me as a teenager, why didn't you take it then, you obviously didn't want me, but this list was important you should have taken it then."

He looked at Granger, there was something in his eyes. He didn't know if it was regret that he hadn't taken the list earlier or regret that he'd done this to his child. Callen didn't know and he didn't care.

He needed to talk to Sam.

"Can we have a moment?" Sam asked as he noticed the unspoken plea.

Granger nodded and moved out into the hallway.

* * *

Sam pulled Callen into a hug and for a moment Callen closed his eyes and breathed in the calming scent of the man. Then he pushed away.

"Get it out of me Sam." Callen said.

"Sorry?" Sam asked, confused.

Callen picked a razor from the sink in the bathroom and handed it to him, "The chip, get it out, give it to him. He doesn't want me he just wants that damn chip and Hetty, she's a Comescu? How in the hell am I supposed to trust people if they all lie to me?" Callen stepped back and looked at Sam, "You…?"

Sam took the razor and dropped it in the sink, pulling Callen into a passionate kiss, leaving Callen panting against the cold porcelain.

"I will never lie to you, I will never betray you and I love you with every fiber of my being. But I won't take that chip out of you with a razor."

"Why not?" Callen asked, still slightly blushing over the declaration Sam had just given.

"Because you have been hurt enough, we will go to the hospital together and we will have it removed safely. If that's what you wish."

Callen nodded, "Please."

"Get some clothes on, we will do this together, I'll tell them."

Sam walked into their living room and looked at the two older people who were sitting worried on the couch.

"G's agreed to have it removed. We are going to the hospital and then you two can take the microdot and leave."

"I want…" Granger started.

"Right now Granger, I don't care what you want. My partner is hurt and upset, there are people coming after him, there have been all his life because of things beyond his control, he was a kid, you should have been there for him, Granger and you!" He turned to Hetty, "You mean the most to him, you should never have lied to him, you should have told him about the Comescu's and your connection to them. He was willing to put his life on the line for both of you and you both screwed him royally. Well, I love him and he and I are together now, which means if either one of you hurt him again, you will have to answer to me." Sam scowled at the pair of them.

"We want to make things right Mr. Hanna." Hetty said.

Granger stood up and walked over to Sam, "You stay protecting my son. I know I've done wrong, but I have always wanted to keep him safe. Talk to him Sam, get him to listen to me. I don't expect him to forgive me, but I will make sure my father doesn't hurt him, I do care and I hope one day he'll forgive me. But this list is important many lives depend on this list being kept safe."

Callen walked around the corner, bag in hand. "You'll have your damn list, then I'm done." He looked at Sam and opened the door, "I'll meet you in the car."

He walked out towards the Challenger and looked up at the sound of tires squealing and a speeding car sped down the road.

"G!" Sam yelled, running for the door.


	19. Chapter 19

The light was blinding as the hood was removed from Callen's head and he found himself in a ornate hotel room.

"So, I assume you are not planning on killing me, it would ruin the rug." Callen quipped at the man standing in front of him.

The man scowled and turned away.

"Who are you?" He asked.

Still no reply. The man walked to the window and looked out of it.

"Where am I?" Callen tried again.

Again the man said nothing, but picked up his phone and sent a text.

"Just tell me what you want?" Callen said, hoping that if he acted innocent enough, they would think they had made a mistake, although his gut told him they had exactly who they were after, "Who are you? Comecsu?" He asked.

The man by the window laughed quietly, but still said nothing.

Slowly Callen started to feel more and more uncomfortable. He had no idea how long it had been since he had been taken. He had at first assumed that it had something to do with that chip in his ear, but no one had asked him anything. The man in the room hadn't spoken to him at all.

He looked at the clock on the mantel in front of him. By his reckoning he had been gone about 5 hours. He could see the sun starting to rise over the city.

He knew Sam would be looking for him, he hoped so, but the others? He didn't know.

* * *

Another man in a suit walked in and looked at Callen sat on the chair.

"Why is he tied up, Pyotr?" He asked. "Untie him at once and get him some food."

Anatoli looked kindly at Callen, "I am sorry, they were asked to bring you here, but sometimes…. Help is hard to get." He smiled, spreading his hands in apology. In many ways he reminded Callen of Arkady.

"Who are you?" He asked.

"My name is Anatoli Reznikov, I am your Grandfather." Anatoli said as he took a seat at the table by the window. "Come join me as we breakfast. You must be hungry, I remember my Nikita as a child was always hungry in the mornings."

"Who?" Callen feigned ignorance, which to be honest, while he thought of Owen as the assistant director and not as Nikita Reznikov, it wasn't hard.

Anatoli looked confused, "Your father."

Callen shook his head, "I don't have a father." He said, "As far as I know my mother died when I was five," For a moment Callen stifled a smirk as he replied, "No one has introduced themselves to me as my father."

Anatoli let a moment of annoyance cross his face; he sighed, this would be harder than he thought. He stopped for a moment, thinking, maybe it would be easier.

"I am sorry it has taken us so long to meet, moy vnuk." Anatoli stopped as one of his men came in with a tray full of breakfast foods and two pots of coffee and tea. "Please, sit." Anatoli said again as Callen, who hadn't moved an inch just looked at him.

With a curt nod Callen sat down. After all, he knew from long experience, he should take nourishment while he could. Maybe he could play this to his advantage. Maybe Anatoli wasn't as bad as he had been made out to be.

"So…" Callen sat down and looked at the man, "So... You're my grandfather?" He asked, "Why did you have me kidnapped?"

"Like I have said, I am sorry for the way my men handled it. In the motherland they would have called that an invitation." Anatoli looked at the younger man, "Tell me about yourself?" He asked.

"Nothing to tell." Callen shrugged.

Anatoli smiled, "I beg to differ, my sources tell me you are in law enforcement of some kind."

Callen shrugged, "Security, for a data server warehouse, nothing fancy." He lied.

Anatoli nodded, "Still, you are employed, no? This is a good thing with jobs as hard to come by as they are."

"What else do you know about me?" Callen asked.

Anatoli took a sip of his coffee.

"I spent a long time looking for you."

Callen gave a short, barked laugh, "Well, I could have used you when I was a child."

Anatoli looked sad. That surprised Callen and only his training kept it from showing on his face.

"I had a private detective try to look into your past." Anatoli admitted, "I was saddened at what I found."

"I'm sorry," Callen said automatically. He didn't know why, but after his meeting with Constantine, he had expected Anatoli to be ruthless and cold. He found himself warming up to the older man.

"No, child, I should be sorry." Anatoli reached out to take Callen's hand, but Callen pulled away. "I am so sorry, you were… are a part of my family, had my son told me about you I would have found you earlier, like I did with your sister."

"Amy? You found Amy?" Callen was shocked at that.

Anatoli shook his head, "No… Jennifer. I am responsible, I should have raised your father better."

"I don't have a sister called Jennifer, I had a sister called Amy, she died when she was eleven. I found this out when I was an adult."

"Jennifer is your younger sister. Your father didn't love your mother, I am afraid, he left you and your sister to grow up alone. He married another woman and had a child with her. Jennifer is your younger sister." He pulled a lot of pictures of a young woman that Callen recognized. He kept his surprise hidden.

Anatoli waited, soon he would play his trump card.

* * *

Granger had deliberately left him out in the cold? He'd had another family? He had lied to him, told him about the evil man that was his grandfather and not told him about his sister.

He took a sip of the coffee in front of him trying to hide the warring emotions that were going on in his head.

"I know you recently found out that my son… who now goes by Owen Granger, is your father. Did you know he found you years ago and decided to leave you, not to be your father?"

Callen had remembered seeing Granger, but the man hadn't told him why he hadn't taken him in.

"I do not lie Callen, I do not steal, I am not the man your father paints me to be. However, he lies; this is why your father didn't come for you."

He took a small digital recorder out of his pocket and placed it on the table, "I think you have trust issues, yes? I hope this will prove to you that I am not the enemy." He pushed it towards Callen who took it and turned it over in his hand.

He heard the sound of a car engine as it stopped and Hetty's voice over the speaker….

Hetty pulled over to the side of the road, "You found him, and yet you never took him in?"

"He wasn't my son." Granger said angrily, "That... That boy wasn't my son, he was…" His voice stopped for a moment and Callen's heart clenched at the venom in Granger's words.

"He was sitting on a wall outside the Los Angeles County Children's Services offices. I knew it was him, he looked like his mother, and those eyes, he couldn't be anyone else. I sat in the car and watched him. I was so… He wasn't my son, he was angry, rebellious, sitting on a wall a can of alcohol by his feet and he was smoking. There was a security guard watching him, but he hadn't approached him, like he was afraid of him. It was obvious he was a delinquent and he hated everyone. I watched as his latest foster family approached him, how he was with the mother, how he practically drooled over the elder son, he was manipulative and cunning. I couldn't go to him then."

"Then was when he probably needed you the most Owen." Hetty chastised him.

"I know, I did some background digging to find out what had happened. I knew as much as he ever said about Bill and his brother, I heard rumors about what Grant had done when he had got back to the group home. How other kids had asked to go and stay with Nick after he urged them to go. How over the years only a few would come back. I lost faith in him. I didn't want him, not like that. I couldn't get him back and then lose him to prison in the future."

Callen couldn't keep the pain from his face as he listened.

"Amy had been perfect, like her mother. But I found that Grant, he was damaged. I just assumed it was because he had witnessed his mother's murder. I thought he was… _defective._ "

Hetty sigh was audible, "Oh, Owen."

"I was hurting Hetty and I took that hurt out on everyone around me."

"And Grant paid the highest price?" Hetty asked.

"Not just him, his sister's too, Amy paid with her life, and Jennifer…"

"Jennifer?" Hetty voice sounded surprised.

"I went back into deep cover, I was sent to Korea as a businessman my contact was a North Korean double agent. I got too close, Mai Lin gave birth to Jennifer my daughter in 1981. We arrested her a few months back. I had her transferred."

"Does she know you are her father?" Hetty asked.

"I told her as I had her transferred and I paid for her lawyer."

"Are you planning on informing Mr. Callen that he has a younger sister?" Hetty asked.

Granger shook his head, "Not yet. Right now Jen is safe and I want her to stay that way."

* * *

The conversation cut out as Anatoli took the dictaphone from Callen's hand. "I am sorry." He said as he looked at the shocked man. "Your father has been abusing you his whole life, he left you with those animals in the system, he used you as a mule to hold his lies and left you alone. I want to be here for you Callen. I know about you and your lover Sam."

Callen flinched at that.

Anatoli smiled, "He is handsome, no?"

Callen shook his head in shock, "No…. I mean, Yes… yes…" He let out a small smile.

"I do not judge as long as he makes you happy." Anatoli said, "My friend Kirkin, he likes men too." He shrugged, "It is a whole new world, who am I to fight it." He smiled and then looked at Callen sadly, "I know your father put a chip in you. I know you want it out. I have someone who can do that for you."

Callen looked worried at his grandfather, "Then I give you the chip I suppose?" He asked angrily.

"No, I do not care what you do with it. Keep it, destroy it, give it to the authorities, it is up to you. But all your life people have been chasing you, killing those you care about to get that chip. Do you not think it is about time it was gone, is your Sam not important enough that you want to protect him from this?" His grandfather asked softly.

For once Callen stopped and looked at the man, there was kindness and concern in his eyes. Was the concern for him? He didn't know, but taking the chip out would be one way to ensure no one tried to kill Sam.

Callen took a deep breath as he thought about his reply and then turned to his grandfather.

"Ok, I'll do it."


	20. Chapter 20

"I'll do it under one condition." Callen said. "Bring Sam here. I don't mean kidnap him, tell him where I am and bring him here. Let him stay with me. I need to know he's safe."

Anatoli looked at his grandson with a wry smile, "Of course, my boy, I will bring him to you and he can watch over you to make sure we do not harm you. I would appreciate it if you could call him first though, I do not want any of my men harmed by a misunderstanding."

"Of course." Callen said and waited as Anatoli handed Callen his cell phone.

Callen sat and dialed Sam's number smiling as it took less than a ring for Sam to answer.

"If you've hurt him; I'll kill you." Sam growled as he picked up the phone.

"I haven't hurt anyone Sam." Callen replied.

" _ **G?!**_ " Sam's voice was a mixture of relief and worry.

"I'm fine," Callen didn't want to give too much away, "Got some guys coming for you, can you pack a bag, for you and me for a few days. Tell Hetty and Granger not to try and find me, I'm fine." He reiterated.

"Where are you? Who took you?" Sam asked.

Callen could hear the worry in Sam's voice, but he could also hear movement in the background.

"I'm fine, I'm safe Sam, with family. Trust me… Just, I need you here, _please_?" he asked.

"I'll be ready, where do they want to meet."

"Go to drop spot number two, near Venice Beach, I'll give them directions. I need you Sam, do this for me."

"I love you G, you know I'm coming for you."

"I love you too." Callen said as he cut off the call.

"Is he coming?" Anatoli asked.

"He is." Callen wrote down an address, "Send your men here, Sam will be waiting."

Anatoli nodded and taking the piece of paper, handed it to his man who left to pick Sam up.

"I hope your father doesn't do anything silly, Nikita was always impulsive."

"Not my father." Callen snapped. "I mean, I'm sorry… I know he's your son, but I can't think of him as my father."

"I fully understand." Anatoli replied, "He should have raised you, put you and your sister's beyond all other things."

Callen flinched again at the thought he had another sister out there, even if she was his half sister; She, like him, had been abandoned to the winds of fate by Granger.

He remembered their meeting, she had got the skills he had to admit, she had kicked his ass, although he would never admit to that. He needed to find out where she was after this microdot was out of him. She needed to know she wasn't alone and that she had family.

* * *

Sam paced outside the meeting place where Callen had told him to wait. He felt uncomfortable, knowing that he had a tracker in his shoe made him feel at least a bit better.

Owen had nearly lost it when Sam had told him that Callen was ok, but he wanted Sam to join him and that he was with family.

"Family? That means… He has to be with my father. Damn it, Grant is in danger, Sam; I don't care what he tells you Anatoli is a ruthless son of a bitch and will kill my son the second he has that microdot."

"Callen seems to feel he's in no danger. He just wants me there."

"Did he tell you where _there_ is?" Owen asked.

Sam shook his head, "No, just to grab us both some clothes and meet him at the second emergency rendezvous spot in Venice."

Owen put his hand in his pocket, "Take this, put it in your shoe."

"What is it?" Sam asked.

"It's a GPS Tracker, I can find you with it." Owen explained, "Activate it when you are ready and Grant is with you and we will come and get you out."

Sam nodded, his face taut with worry. "How dangerous is this man, your father?"

Owen looked grim, "He's killed before, I know he'll kill again. He hated Grant's mother and I'm sure, although I can't prove it, that he had something to do with Clara's whereabouts being leaked to the Comescus, which resulted in her death."

Sam looked angry, "Does G know that?"

"I don't know, I doubt it." Owen growled as Sam picked up the bag he had packed and headed for the front door.

"I'll bring him home." Sam vowed as he walked out the door.

* * *

Callen paced his room, waiting for Sam to arrive.

He wasn't a prisoner, far from it however he was worried about how Sam would react when he was picked up.

He jumped as the door knocked.

"Callen?" Anatoli's voice came, "May I come in?"

"Of course." Callen replied as he opened the door, "Is everything ok? Was Sam…"

"Your friend Sam was at the rendezvous point, he's enroute now." Anatoli said, "I have talked to the surgeon at the clinic, we can fit you in in two days if that is agreeable with you."

Callen nodded that will be fine.

"When he gets here, I will bring him to you and leave you to yourselves for the day, although I hope you will both join me for dinner this evening?"

Callen smiled, "We would love to Grandfather."

Anatoli smiled back at him, "Thank you Grandson."

For Callen the waiting was the hardest part. He wanted this microdot out and he wanted his life back. More than that he wanted Sam here. Although his grandfather was being nice and accommodating Callen knew from past experience that nice and accommodating would usually turn and bite him in the ass. Despite the facade he put on with his grandfather, he didn't trust the man an inch.

Having Sam to have his back would help ease his worry.

The one thing he did want, however was to get the microdot out of the lump in his ear, he didn't want anyone to get their hands on it, but he did want it gone. Besides, it had been over forty years since Janvier had implanted the microdot in him, the people involved were probably dead or moved on by now. So he doubted anyone could make use of the information, it was probably the fact that they had been looking for so long that they needed to just find closure themselves by having the microdot in their possession.

Either way he knew one thing. When this was over and the microdot was out he would be talking to Granger and making sure that he stayed away permanently. He hadn't asked for this to happen to him and he'd had enough.

* * *

Before long there was a knock at the door.

"Yes." Callen called.

The door opened and a man Callen hadn't met walked in, "I have your man… Hanna…? Here, may I send him up?" He asked.

Callen nodded, "Please do, tell my grandfather we will join him for dinner."

The man nodded and left, Callen couldn't help it, he found himself pacing knowing Sam was so close.

The door knocked again and Sam walked into the room. "G?" he called.

Callen's smile was blinding, "SAM!" he crossed the room in a few short strides and pulled him in for a kiss.

"God, Sam… I've missed you."

Sam chuckled, "It's been less than 48 hours, and you missed me already?"

Callen nodded and held him tight. "Yes, yes I did. I'm sorry Sam." He mumbled his face buried into Sam's chest.

Sam cupped his hand under Callen's chin and lifted his face to look at him.

"Brat?"

Callen's head dipped and although he moved to drop to his knees, Sam's arms held him tight.

"I missed you too Brat, I thought I had lost you." Sam held him tighter and breathed in his scent reaffirming himself that Callen was indeed alive and for the moment safe. "Is it ok to talk here?" Sam asked.

Callen nodded, "The room isn't bugged and…" He got up and walked to the door locking it with the key. "And the door's locked." He smirked. He pulled his shirt off and stood in front of Sam, who licked his lips hungrily.

"We have a few hours, now we could unpack or…." Callen was cut off as he was grabbed from behind by Sam who threw him down onto the bed.

"God… I missed you!" Sam exclaimed as he relaid his claim on the man he loved and spent the few uninterrupted hours they had making sure that he knew it.

* * *

Callen woke and lazily stretched, revelling in the feel of Sam's arms encasing him and making him feel safe. He didn't want to move, but he had to. They had to shower and change before Sam met his grandfather. Most of all G had to fill him in on his plan.

Sam leaned forward, his eyes half closed and sleepily kissed G.

"Better Brat?" Sam asked.

"Yessir." Callen grinned.

"Good, now. You shower and I'll go in after you then you can fill me in on what's going on." Sam said.

Callen sat up, "Great minds think alike Sam. You have that dresser over there for your stuff."

As Sam got up Callen grabbed the sheets off of the bed for the laundry.

As he turned the sheets bunched up in front of him Sam smirked at the sight of his naked ass. "You look good like that, it's nice that we've had this time. You know I love you, right?" Sam reaffirmed.

Callen nodded, "I hope soon all this mess is over, I can't wait till it's just you and me again." He said as he walked into the bathroom, not noticing the look that flitted across Sam's face.

Sam watched as Callen walked into the bathroom and a knot hit his gut, 'When this was all over?' was Callen planning on leaving NCIS? What had his lover planned with Anatoli? Sam wouldn't put it past his lover, to put himself in danger to save others, but right now all Sam wanted to do was grab Callen and leave with him.

" **STOP IT!** " Callen called from the shower.

Sam ran to the bathroom, worried.

"G?"

He smiled as he saw his lovers naked form the other side of the shower screen.

"Stop worrying Sam, I'm safe here. I have what they want, they are not going to hurt me."

Sam sighed and shook his head, "Yeah, but what about when they have what they want, what happens to you then G?"

Callen shrugged in the shower, "Who cares, let's just deal with now."

"Now?" Sam asked.

Callen smirked and stuck his head out of the shower stall, "Yeah… Now, pass me the soap?"

Sam laughed and grabbed a fresh bar off the countertop and followed him into the stall.


	21. Chapter 21

Callen walked into the room where Anatoli was sitting waiting for them to join him.

"Sam, this is my grandfather, Anatoli Reznikov." He said indicating the older man.

Sam smiled and extended his hand. "G tells me you've been nothing but kind to him."

"He is family." Anatoli said, as if that explained everything.

Sam looked worried for a moment and Anatoli noticed. "Ah, but then family has not been kind to my grandson and you are concerned no?"

"G is my family, I am concerned for him." Sam said glaring at the older man.

Callen moved and touched his hand to Sam's arm.

Anatoli nodded, "I understand, you love my grandson and he loves you, this is a good thing. As to my place in his life, I fully intend to earn it. I do not expect for him to trust me, especially if his father has told him about me, but rest assured Mr. Hanna, I care a great deal for my grandson and intend to prove it to the best of my ability."

Callen blinked in surprise, as he measured the truth of the old man's words. His grandfather really did care about him.

With a smile he could not contain, he moved to sit next to Sam at the table as Anatoli took his seat.

"Shall we eat?" The old man asked. "I took the liberty of ordering a selection so you may eat what you want. Also, my men tell me that you are a Muslim Mr. Hanna. I do not know much about the religion, but I do understand that you are forbidden pork products, as such I have made sure that none are in this selection."

Although Sam studied the Qu'ran, he was not a fully practicing Muslim, however, he did appreciate the gesture and told him so.

Anatoli smiled back at the larger man, "I like to make sure my family is well taken care of." He said. "You as my Grandson's partner are now a part of my family."

They did not talk about the upcoming surgery at all during the meal, instead Anatoli asked about Callen's thoughts and views on a wide variety of subjects, listening intently and agreeing where he did.

Callen found himself liking this man more and more as the evening progressed.

In the end, Sam made his excuses and went back to his room, sensing that Callen wanted to talk to the older man alone.

* * *

Sat in two wingback chairs watching as the sun went down, they looked out of the huge picture window that adorned Anatoli's main room and sipped on a glass of bourbon each.

"This has been a pleasant evening." Anatoli said as he sipped his drink.

Callen nodded. "I am sorry." He said quietly.

"For what?" Anatoli looked at his grandson worriedly.

"I think I misjudged you."

"You do not know me well enough to have formed a real opinion of me. I understand that." Anatoli shrugged. "All you know about me is what you have been told by your father. I heard you had a run in with his cousin as well. Konstantin was always a handful, ran with the wrong crowd."

"I thought he worked for you?" Callen said, confused.

Anatoli laughed, "No… not at all. I was until my retirement a loyal KGB officer. I toed the party line, but never… never crossed it."

Callen looked over at him, he just knew instinctively that this man was telling the truth. "So… tell me what you know about this chip?" he asked.

Anatoli sighed, "A man… Marcel Janvier, he worked with an underground subversive group to help destabilize Russia. I believe he worked with my Nikita to smuggle people out of the country. These were not good people. These were people wanted for crimes inside of Russia."

"I know my father… Nikita, helped families escape persecution from Russia for their political beliefs." Callen said. "My mother met him while he was doing that."

A dark look crossed Anatoli's face, but he said nothing.

"What?" Callen asked.

Anatoli shook his head, "It is not for me to say."

"Please, I've had enough of people hiding stuff." Callen sighed as he stood up. It had been a nice evening, but if Anatoli too was going to lie to him, he might as well leave now.

Anatoli put his hand on his elbow. "I apologize, it is wrong of me to keep things from you, but… it is hard, he is moy syn. A parent always wants to see the good in their child, but…" He trailed off as Callen turned back.

"Tell me what you know." Callen demanded.

Anatoli nodded and motioned for Callen to sit in the chair again.

"I assume that you have talked to Nikita about me," the old man said "He told you about my career as a KGB officer, maybe he told you about his career as well?"

Callen nodded, "Some of it. He told me you were dangerous and not to trust you."

Anatoli nodded, "I do not blame him. I am dangerous."

Callen looked concerned as Anatoli continued, "I am dangerous to him."

Callen turned and looked confused at his grandfather. "To him? Why?" he asked. "He told me you were responsible for the death of my mother." Callen snapped.

"I did not hold with him mixing with a Roma woman that was true," Anatoli admitted "However, I did not know he had fathered children with her; he kept that from me. I was a good KGB officer and I toed the party line. I never did anything to betray my country, but your father did. He worked with your CIA and I found out that the woman he was seeing was a CIA officer. I told him to leave her and that she would probably arrest him, but he said he was going to deal with her and to leave her to him. The next thing I know, he's disappeared with state secrets and I don't hear from him for thirty years. He had met up with Marcel Janvier and burned the woman he was seeing to a local crime family…" He stopped as he saw Callen understand what he was telling him.

"Granger… Nikita… he burned… NO?" Callen shook his head in disbelief, "No… he… he loved her."

Anatoli placed his hand on his grandson's shoulder, "I am sorry, I have a letter he wrote. He told me he had children, and that I would never see them and that he was going to take them to America."

Callen looked shocked, "I…I need…" He could not finish his sentence and stood up. "I need Sam." He gasped out as he found himself falling to his knees trying not to vomit.

* * *

After what seemed like hours to Callen, but in reality was only moments, Sam was thundering in the room. "What's wrong, what did you do to him?"

"We were talking, I told him something that he didn't take well." Anatoli stated, matter of factly.

Sam bent over Callen and rubbed his back hoping to even out his breathing, "G… G? What happened…?"

Callen shook his head, unable to tell him, he reached up and grasped his hand like a lifeline.

"Gran…." He stopped as he tried to breathe again.

"I was telling him about Nikita," Anatoli said, "and how he was responsible for the death of his mother."

"Granger killed your mom?" Sam gasped.

"He… He said so." Callen shook as Sam pulled him into his arms.

"You don't know this for a fact." Sam replied.

"I have never lied to him," Anatoli said affronted. "I can prove it. I don't know what you think you have been told about me, but I was never a double agent. Nikita is and he is still being paid by the FSB, he is selling secrets to Russia. I would not usually betray my country, but my family comes first and what Nikita has done to my grandson is unacceptable; he must be stopped."

"He told me the chip in my ear was a list of the Russian people that had been freed, but that Russia would still want to imprison." Callen said.

Anatoli shook his head, "From what I know, the list is a list of sleeper agents and double agents in the United States. Your father and Marcel Janvier are on that list. I think your mother found out that he was a double agent and not for the US. I think she was trying to leave without him. From what I have on the letter, Clara was trying to take you and escape from him. She had wanted to bring Amy, but she wouldn't leave your father. So she had taken you ostensibly to the beach for the day. In reality she was going to be extracted by her team, save you and try and rescue your sister."

Anatoli looked over at his bodyguard. "Call my lawyer, have them release the Clara Callen file." He turned back to the two men. "I know you do not trust me, but I am sure that at no point has Nikita shown you any evidence. I will never lie to you and I will show you the proof as soon as it arrives."

Sam helped Callen up and supported him. "I'm taking him back to our room, he needs time to process this."

"Of course," Anatoli replied. "My room is down the hall if you need me. Please do not hesitate to knock. Are you going to be ok Grant?"

Callen nodded, "I will be… after all it's what I'm used to."

Sadly, Sam nodded in agreement and helped take Callen to their room. He hoped that Callen could work through all of this, before he went into surgery and had the chip removed. His operation had been scheduled for a few days. Right now, Sam did not know who to trust, Granger was a man he knew could not be trusted altogether a man who had lied to his partner, lover and best friend for his whole life. Sam was not even sure he could trust Anatoli, the grandfather who had just appeared out of nowhere. Information from Granger had him pegged as no good, but so far Anatoli Reznikov had been straightforward and honest with Callen. Sam desperately needed to know who to trust, and whom he could safely trust his lover with.


	22. Chapter 22

Callen woke up, he was a bit disorientated and blinked as he looked over at Sam.

"Where am I?" He asked.

Sam smiled, "Hospital. You had the chip removed from your ear."

Callen looked confused, feeling his ear and wincing slightly at the gauze patch covering the small wound. "But that's not for a few days." He replied.

Sam crossed the room in a few quick steps, "You had a bad reaction to some news that Anatoli gave you. He had his doctor sedate you for a few days. You agreed to it as you needed to rest before your operation."

"Anatoli? Did he… Has he got the chip?" Callen asked his throat suddenly feeling dry.

Sam handed him some ice chips, his hand carding through his hair.

"I have it. Anatoli wouldn't take it when the doctor handed it to him. He said it was yours to do with as you saw fit and he said he wouldn't take it without your say so."

Callen blinked in surprise then his face darkened.

"What about Granger?"

Sam shook his head sadly. "He's been texting to ask if you are alright and when I would be handing the list over to him."

"We need to know how to read this thing. I need to know Sam." Callen stated.

"Soon... G, you need to rest babe. I have been worried about you. You haven't been well, you were dehydrated and had an infection when Anatoli's doctor looked over you."

"It's been so much Sam, one thing after another." Callen sighed.

"You trust me Brat?" Sam asked.

"With my life." Callen replied without hesitation.

"Then please, let me take care of you. Trust me to know what's best for you." Sam offered.

"You want to pick between Granger and Anatoli?" Callen asked, even though the question was posed sarcastically Callen really hoped that Sam could help him choose who to give the chip to.

* * *

"Possibly…" Sam smirked as he lifted the lid of a laptop he'd had on the small table that sat across the bed Callen was in.

"Hi Nell." Sam said as Nell's face appeared on the screen.

Nell wasn't in Ops, she was sleepy and her hair was slightly awry, it was obvious from the background that she was at home.

She smiled as she saw them and rubbed her eyes slightly. "Hey guys, long time no see. How are you feeling Callen? Sam told me you'd been operated on."

Callen smiled, still slightly dopey, "Sam's looking after me." He said shooting a look full of love at his partner.

Sam couldn't help the warm feeling that look of love and trust gave to him, but he needed to get back to the matter at hand. "What did you manage to dig up?" Sam asked.

Callen looked over at him confused, unsure as to what Sam had asked Nell to look for.

"I have been looking into Grangers file." Nell started, waiting for a moment as she let the shock settle on Callen's face, waiting for a small nod of approval before continuing. "His files don't add up. There are a lot of things missing or just wrong in his timeline."

"What do you mean?" Callen asked, worried for the safety of his team.

Nell looked over at Sam worried. "I'm not sure that I should say. I mean, he is the Assistant Director?"

Callen sighed, "Nell… He's my father, I want to know if he is responsible for my mother's death. I need to know if I can trust him."

Nell looked shocked for a moment and then guilty. "I thought the Comescu's were responsible for your mother's death?"

Callen shrugged his shoulders, "They killed her, but I think Granger may have been lying to me. I have information, but I want to make sure it gets to the right person." He told her.

Nell bit her bottom lip as she considered his request.

"I will look into it, just one thing Callen, I looked into Anatoli Reznikov's files as well," she told him, "Everything checks out, names dates and places where he said he was. He really was in the KGB. He was tasked with finding sleeper agents from the US. His son was accused of being a double agent, then he disappeared."

Callen nodded his gut sinking.

Nell continued, "Clara Callen was looking into double agents in the late 60's when she disappeared, then as you know surfaced in Romania trying to get her children out of the country and she…" Nell trailed off as she couldn't say it.

Callen nodded, "I know. Any information on who set her up?"

Nell nodded, looking apprehensive, "She called her handler at the CIA."

"Hetty." Callen interrupted.

"Yes… but Callen, I found a recording… I… I'm not sure if you're up to hearing it, I won't play it now but I will download the MP3 file."

Callen shook his head, "Play it. I need to know Nell, before I give this chip to the wrong person."

"I'll send it to you now, you play it and text me when you need me again, I will be available."

Sam nodded and closed the laptop.

"SAM!" Callen exclaimed.

"No G, Not yet, you're not ready to hear it." Sam argued.

"I'm fine, I need to hear this… Please Sam, I need… For once in my life I need to make the right call." Callen lay his head back on the pillow physically exhausted.

* * *

A few hours later Callen woke, Sam was asleep in the chair at the foot of his bed. If he'd had to bet he would have gambled on the fact that Sam in fact hadn't moved the whole time he was asleep. Quietly he sat up and reached for the laptop on the table by his bed, plugging in the headphones beside the laptop he powered up and opened the email Nell had sent him.

The quality of the recording was scratchy, but it was clear.

"Archibald's bookstore?" A woman's voice came over the headphones.

"Hello, this is Clarina Martinescu in Romania, I want to book an overseas delivery?"

"Ah, yes…" The woman paused as some clicking was heard. "A returning customer, one moment please I will pass you over to the mailing department."

"Clara?" Hetty's voice, although younger sounding was instantly recognizable.

There was a small sob of relief as Clara realized that Hetty, her friend was on the other end of the line. "Clara? We thought you were dead, what happened? Where have you been, it's been six years?!" Hetty sounded surprised and worried at the same time.

"Hetty? You've got to get me out of here. I made a mistake… Please…" Clara sobbed, "Nikita, he's ... danger… we're all in danger…"

"Clara… Calm down where are you?" Hetty asked, the slight wobble in her voice that Callen knew so well told him she wasn't anywhere near as calm as she sounded.

"I'm in Romania, Constanta… near the Black Sea. We trusted him… I didn't know." Clara sobbed again, "I need an extraction... Three of us."

"Three?" Hetty sounded surprised.

"Mama?" A small voice came and the phone rustled as Clara moved it.

"Hold on Hetty," She said. "Hey G, what's that?"

"I found a shell Mama," The little boy's voice came bright and happy. Callen's heart clenched as he heard his mother talking to his younger self. "I'm hungry Mama, can we go?"

"Soon my beautiful boy, you sit there for a moment, Mama's on the phone to Aunt Hetty."

"I have an Ant?... Mama's What's an Ant?" Callen asked.

"A friend of Mama's, someone you can always trust." she told him.

The phone moved again, "Sorry Hetty, Like I was saying I need an extraction, myself, my son and daughter." Clara said, "I'll be on the beach tomorrow, we need to get out as soon as possible, there is information you need."

"I will get someone to come to you." Hetty promised.

"No…" Clara sounded scared, "No… Hetty please, just you? I have to keep the children safe."

"Mama, why are you crying?" The small voice beside her asked.

"I'm ok little man." Clara replied, "Hetty please, I trust you with my children's lives, it's not safe here. A crime family, Comescu, are after me… us… something to do with a blood feud. Someone told them who I really am."

"But where have you been?" Hetty asked, "We lost contact with you six years ago."

"I was in Russia, I infiltrated the Reznikov family, met the son, he's agreed to be an asset to help me. He has contacts, we have a list… it needs to get out… But Hetty I'm not sure if I trust Nikita. He's been talking to a man called Janvier. I'm worried about his interest in my son. Amy is attached to her father, but before I bring him back to the US I need to make sure he isn't playing us."

"He wants to defect?" Hetty asked, "I'll need his name."

"Reznikov, Nikita Alexsandr. Major in the KGB." Clara replied. "Please… Hetty… I have to go, I'll be on the beach every afternoon, find us soon, please." The line dropped out from Clara's end but the recording continued.

"No, Hetty… Reznikov is not a man to be trusted. We won't allow him access to the US."

"But William?" Hetty argued with her boss. "Clara is one of our top agents."

"She's been in the wind for six years," The man's voice argued. "Who do we have in Romania, or nearby that can help?"

Papers rustled as Hetty presumably looked through a file.

"No active agents… but I do know someone." Hetty replied.

"Send them then, I want to see this list." William said as the recording cut off.

* * *

Again and again Callen played the recording, silently crying as he heard his mother's voice, he hadn't even noticed the time until Sam placed a hand on his shoulder.

"G?" Sam asked worriedly as his lover sobbed.

"She loved me Sam, she was worried and she was trying to get us to safety."

Sam wrapped him in his arms, "Do you think she didn't trust your father?"

Callen shook his head, "I don't know… I still don't know Sam." Callen closed his eyes and breathed in his lover's scent.

"I have an idea." Sam smiled as he pressed a kiss to Callen's head, "How about we get Nell to decode the list and let you look at it, then you can decide what to do."

Callen nodded, "I think it's a good idea, I'll call her now."

"G, wait… Anatoli is outside." Sam told him.

"Why?" Callen asked, instantly on the defensive.

Sam smiled, "He doesn't want the list, hasn't even asked about it, he just wants to see you, to see if you're ok."

"You'll stay?" He asked, his hand tightening slightly on Sam's arm.

Sam nodded, "Of course I will stay. I've been talking to him while you've been recovering G, he is very worried about you."

"What about Granger?" Callen asked, his hand shaking imperceptibly.

"He's been calling Hetty asking about you, but he's been asking if she's heard from either of us and if we've handed over the chip yet."

Callen closed his eyes and sighed, but said nothing for a moment. "Sam… Ask my grandfather to come in, I'll see him. Take the list to Nell, get her to transcribe it, then we will go from there."

"You sure about this G?" Sam asked.

Callen nodded, "It's time. I've been carrying that thing around for forty years, I want to know what my mother died for."


End file.
